Pansexual nurse wants everyone to stay home so coronavirus gets under control and he can have sex again
A pansexual nurse said he wants everyone in his hometown of Seattle to stay home so the city can get coronavirus under control and he can have sex again.
The nurse, who identified himself as “Nurse Belly Button”, wrote a letter to Portland Mercury columnist Dan Savage to explain his predicament.
He wrote: “Hi, Dan! I’m a hot single pansexual cisgendered male nurse here in Seattle.
“My dating life sure has taken a hit the last few weeks with working so much and the self-isolation.
“Any advice how we can get all of these sexy springtime Seattleites to GO THE F**K HOME ALREADY (#GTFHA) and stop congregating so we can get COVID-19 under control and I can have sex again?”
Savage made the practical suggestion of Seattle closing the parking lots at its public parks, but added: “It looks we’re in for days of rain, which should help keep people inside.”
He continued: “Sorry about the your dating/sex life being on hold, thank you for the work you’re doing, and I hope you have someone to sext or video chat with when you have the time and energy to rub one out.
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“If you don’t, Nurse Belly Button, let me know and I’m sure we can find a steady stream of volunteers who’d be happy to help a hot male nurse out.”
Coronavirus is wreaking havoc on the sex and dating lives of people around the world.
One heartbroken British man found out his fiancé cheated on him after his husband-to-be admitted that he was placed in quarantine with his lover over fears they had coronavirus.
Matt Hillier, from Warrington in Cheshire, was set to marry Brazilian doctor Octavio Santos, in only week’s time, on April 1.
But their impending marriage was gripped by the coronavirus pandemic after Santos, 33, was put in isolation with another man.
“I am angry and bitter,” said Hillier. “He is a cheat and this is a total slap in the face.”