This woman wanted to wipe her girlfriend’s debt away as a birthday present but it seriously backfired
A lesbian whose girlfriend owed her $400 decided to wipe the debt as a birthday present and thought she was being “generous”, but it seriously backfired.
Wanting to know if she had done the wrong thing, she posted the story on the subreddit ‘Am I the A**hole’, a community on the social media platform Reddit which describes itself as: “A catharsis for the frustrated moral philosopher in all of us, and a place to finally find out if you were wrong in an argument that’s been bothering you.”
She said she had given her girlfriend the $400 as a loan for a flight and car repairs, but was yet to see it repaid.
She wrote: “It’s important to note that we’ve been dating for about 10 months, and we’re not at the point in our relationship where we share finances. I’m not exactly broke but I’m not rich either.
“I asked her, nicely, about two months ago whether she was going to be able to pay me back and she was adamant that she would. I mentioned it again about a month ago and she told me not to worry and that she would pay me back.”
Her girlfriend had mentioned that she wanted AirPods, but the lesbian said she “didn’t once ever make her believe that I was getting them for her”.
She continued: “Her birthday rolls around, and I took her out to a nice fancy dinner and got her flowers and a card. As her ‘gift’, I decided to wipe her debt away.
“It was starting to drive a wedge between us and I didn’t want it to be hanging over the both of us going forward, as I intend to be with her for a while.
“She was pissed about this, and told me that it isn’t a gift and I’m an asshole for even considering it. Am I in the wrong here?
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“I genuinely thought I was doing something nice, and $400 is much more than I would have spent on a gift.”
The comments were divided between those who thought the poster was insensitive to give such a “practical” birthday present, and those who thought the girlfriend was ungrateful.
One person, who decided the poster was in fact “the a**hole”, wrote: “Her debt to you and her birthday were unrelated. There was no reason to relate the two… I just think what you did was stupid. You didn’t want the conflict of confronting her so that she repaid you immediately.
“But you then decided that you can’t just let the money go because that’s a loss to you. So gift her the fact that you are willing to let the money go and got no other present.
“You can’t really tell me that you can’t understand why she would be upset with that, right? Put it this way: ‘You owe me money but as a birthday gift, I’ll let it go. You’re welcome.'”
But another commenter thought the birthday present was thoughtful, writing: “My girlfriend (also both lesbian) gifted me $30 when I was struggling with bills. I cried. I think you were being thoughtful, I don’t really understand her reaction… She can buy AirPods if she wants now.”
Last week, a gay man wanted to know if he was “the a**hole” for wanting to have nothing more to do with his sister after she refused to invite his partner of five years to her wedding because her soon-to-be husband comes from a religious family.
He was advised by a commenter: “Crash the wedding with your partner dressed as Elton John in pride flag capes and be the gayest gay you can be. Fuck those a**holes.”