Trans people share their feelings of loss at not experiencing childhood as their true gender

London Trans Pride announces June protest: 'We march for trans life'

Trans people are sharing their feelings of loss at having come out later in life in a moving thread on Twitter.

“How many trans people, especially those who started transition as adults (doubly so if older than I), feel a lost youth? Missed on a childhood that matched with your real gender, wish you didn’t had to be your agab [assigned gender at birth]?” asked Brittany, a non-binary trans femme.

Since asking the question on 14 October, her post has been liked over 900 times.


“I started transition when I was 21, so a young adult, but even I feel a sense of lost youth… well more so wasted than lost. I had my youth, but I was depressed and fucked up and I wasn’t being myself,” said Catherine Bernard, a 26-year-old trans woman.

Many of the Twitter users replying had come out as trans or transitioned later in life – in their 40s, 50s, or 60s.


“I transitioned at 41 and I don’t really feel a sense of a lost *childhood* so much as a lost young adulthood! I’d do anything to go back and live as a young woman in her twenties!” said one Twitter user.

Others said that transitioning later was part and parcel of a tough life.

“I transitioned in my 50s,” said Lesley the Leither. “A survivor of childhood sexual abuse, raped in my teens. I’ve had cancer. I had my life. It was tough. I have children. They’re amazing. I am an addict / alcoholic in recovery. I’m pissed off that Hearts weren’t champions in ‘65 and and ‘86. That’s it.”


Another Twitter user added: “I’ve been dressing for 50+ years and only recently really accepted it. Yes, I wish I could relive those years.”

Non-binary people also replied to the tweet. One non-binary person wrote: “I really don’t even know what a non-binary teenhood would have been. It’s hard to answer the tweet because of that, but I think the enormous amount of grief I feel in response to the question is probably telling.”

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