The ultimate same-sex wedding guide for LGBT couples

Tijen Butler April 25, 2019
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A gay wedding cake representing same-sex marriage

(Getty Images)

If you’re thinking about your future same-sex wedding, there are so many things to consider from the wedding location to the invitations, wedding cake and honeymoon.

We’ve therefore put together an ultimate same-sex wedding guide to help you during your preparations.

Who proposes in a same-sex relationship?

You’d be surprised how often this question is asked.

Many heterosexual relationships follow the tradition that ‘the man proposes to the woman’. However, things are done a little differently in queer relationships within the LGBT+ community. The difference is… anyone can pop the question without a single raised eyebrow. That’s what you call equality.

A lesbian couple from Portland get engaged in a Harry Potter themed proposal
Heather Pearson, of Portland, decided to pop the question to her girlfriend and fellow Potterhead, Kelsey Stacy.

The beauty is that LGBT couples don’t have the old fashioned pressures that go in line with general societal expectations. If you want to marry your partner, you can propose regardless of gender.

So, the answer is… whoever.

Same-sex wedding locations

If you’re engaged to your same-sex partner, you will no doubt be weighing up several gay wedding ceremony ideas.

japanese lesbians marry

Unfortunately, the world hasn’t progressed to the extent where same-sex weddings can be held anywhere like a straight wedding. Instead, you need to research the venue and ensure they are LGBT friendly.

Here are some ideas for gay wedding locations where there are many LGBT friendly ceremony venues:

  • London, England
  • Manchester, England
  • Kent, England
  • Toronto, Canada
  • Sydney, Australia
  • Melbourne, Australia
  • San Francisco, California
  • Miami, Florida
  • Fire Island, New York

The engagement and wedding rings

Your wedding ring should reflect whatever you wish it to be. Indeed, you could go down to a typical jeweller as a ring can just be a ring regardless of what kind of relationship you are in.

gay wedding rings marriage hands

Or you could find a specific jeweller that will take pride in having LGBT customers, creating beautiful rings to demonstrate love.

Often, same-sex couples will get matching rings with stunning designs, and an inscription inside the ring.

Gay wedding invitation ideas

Wedding invitations are so fun to prepare and there are thousands of themes to pick from.

Often, couples will keep the invitations in tone to the actual wedding theme.

Wedding theme ideas:

  • Vintage: Vintage style weddings are utterly gorgeous and classic
  • Whimsical: Playfully quaint and imaginative, a whimsical wedding won’t be forgotten
  • Rustic: Wooden and homely, a rustic-themed wedding is stunning
  • Bohemian: Inspired by the beautiful outdoors, a bohemian wedding can look like it’s from a mythical enchanted fairytale
  • Romantic: Think pink, red, white and floral, a classic romantic wedding fill look like love is literally in the air
  • Movie: If you each have a shared passion for a movie, such as Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings, many couples choose to have a movie themed wedding

Once your wedding theme is chosen, your invitation should reflect it. So, if you’re going to have a whimsical wedding with purple flowers, it could be cute to have a similar invitation.

So, what kind of invitation do you want to have?

Gay wedding cake

The wedding cake is considered one of the most important parts of the big day. You should line up cake tastings so you can have the perfect one, whether it’s grand and spectacular or simple and delicious.

Couple cutting cake

It would also be worthwhile to search up local bakeries before you go into random places. Be warned that there have been cases where bakeries refuse to create wedding cakes for same-sex couples so you should try to seek one you know is LGBT-friendly. This way, you know your mood won’t be ruined by ignorance during the wedding planning.

When it comes to decorating the cake, have a groom-and-groom or bride-and-bride go on top. It really is an adorable touch and gives tradition a nice, progressive twist.

Otherwise, you can go for other classy, beautiful cakes that reflect your own style.

Consider registering for gifts or asking for money

You’d be surprised how many people actually search for “gay wedding gift ideas” as if it could be much different from a straight couple.

So, unless you want something insanely stereotypical that your aunt and uncle picked out from the Amazon ‘gay’ section, you might want to consider registering for gifts you’re actually interested in.

Same-sex honeymoon locations

Canada and New Zealand are considered the best countries for same-sex couples to visit for their honeymoon. They are LGBT travel-friendly, have marriage equality, forward-thinking mindset and a romantic setting.

Other LGBT honeymoon destinations include:

  • Switzerland
  • Ireland
  • France
  • Greece
  • Australia
  • South Africa
  • Costa Rica
  • Spain
  • California, USA

It’s very important that LGBT couples look up the specific location (and indeed, the hotel) that they will be going to. It would be awful to go on your romantic honeymoon only to face homophobia. This happened to Stephen Fry and his husband while in Honduras, Central America.

Watch Gok Wan play a wedding themed ‘Would you rather…?’: 

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