Breaking up is rough. Whether you are the one being dumped or the one doing the dumping, it can be hard to move on. So, here are five tips to help you get over someone after a break up.
Everyone will have to go through it at some point in their lives and if you’re not sure how to deal with your break up, YouTuber foxyhotmess, also known as Jade, shares her five top tips for getting over an ex.
From being honest about how you feel to setting your boundaries, Jade—aka F0XY on YouTube—shares her tips for processing breaking up with someone and dealing with the feeling of being alone.
Watch Jade’s tips on how to get over someone in the video below:
Be honest to yourself about why the relationship ended
Jade’s top tip is being honest with yourself and your partner about how you feel in order to move forward.
Jade also stresses that it’s important to remember that just because you “didn’t end up getting married and having a kid… doesn’t mean that it was a waste.” All relationships teach us something about ourselves and what we do and do not want.
Set your boundaries, and stick to them
Decide what you need to help you move on, whether that’s cutting off contact completely or deciding who gets which coffee shop. “Be strategic about what your boundaries are and what’s going to be comfortable for you… but don’t be petty,” says Jade.
Don’t call them
Don’t get in contact with them whenever you feel lonely or “because you want a hug.”
You are bound to miss them if you are used to spending time with them and doing things with them. Hang out with your friends instead or take up a new hobby to keep yourself busy. “You have to actually work to fill some of the void that you may be feeling, you don’t just break up with somebody and then that’s it.”
Expect your life to change
“Prep yourself for a complete shift… your finances might change, you may have to move, your friends might change,” says Jade.
Being single means you have a lot more freedom to learn about yourself and enjoy doing things you might not have done before. Now you no longer have that person as part of your life and “you’re not worried about trying to please this person or trying to keep this person happy” you can focus on yourself.
End your relationship with love
Your break-up doesn’t need to be messy and full of hate. Remember that you were in love with that person at some point so you should “end your relationship with the same amount of love that you started it with.“