Director Desiree Akhavan is tired of hearing tropes about bisexuality.
The Iranian-American filmmaker, who recently tackled the issue of gay conversion therapy in the film The Miseducation of Cameron Post, has been outspoken about her experience as a bisexual woman.
She recently addressed the issue of bi-erasure ahead of the release of Channel 4’s TV comedy series The Bisexual, which she wrote and directed as well as playing the lead role.
“It’s complicated—there isn’t a face of bisexuality and it feels disingenuous,” she said at an event at London’s BFI Southbank earlier this month.
She continued: “If I’m walking down the street with a woman, I’m a lesbian.
“I realised recently every time I did anything people said ‘bisexual Desiree’ and I felt like it was a deeply embarrassing thing. They always said: ‘she f***s men and women.’ If they’d said lesbian I’d have been like f*** yeah but it was embarrassing.
“There are a lot of openly bisexual people, but you identify them with who they’re holding hands with in that moment.
“When you don’t see something often, it becomes hard to relate to.”
Speaking to PinkNews, Akhavan busted five ridiculous myths about bisexuality that need to die off already.
You never want to be in a monogamous relationship
“I’ve had a lot of straight men tell me: ‘well you can date anyone, why would you settle down? You don’t have to worry about marriage or a family because you’re incapable of monogamy.’
“I mean, I’m still figuring out my own feelings about monogamy but I think that’s a bulls**t assumption.
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bisexuals love threesomes
“If you love pizza, and you love mac ‘n’ cheese, wouldn’t you want them together? That sounds disgusting, I would not want pizza and mac ‘n’ cheese together.
“No, as a bisexual you do not just crave nothing but threesomes.
“I mean, I love carbohydrates but I like to pace them out.”
You’ll never be fully satisfied
“It’s weird because all it means to be bisexual is that gender is not part of your attraction to someone, or gender is not the biggest outlier.
“Being bisexual means that there are other things that attract you to people.”
You’re attracted to everyone
“No, I don’t think bisexual people are attracted to everyone. I think that it’s quite simple – gender isn’t the outlier.
“You value other things, and gender is just not one of them. There are things you find beautiful in men and women but not all men and all women.”
Bisexuals are just massive sluts
“People assume bisexuals are just massive sluts. I don’t think most people are.
“I think I am a massive slut but not all people are. I’m not, I’m being silly…”