YouTuber says he was sexually assaulted at gay bear week: I feel ‘humiliated’
A YouTuber has spoken out about an alleged sexual assault at Sitges Bears Week in 2017, saying his abusers left him feeling “so violated,” “physically sick,” and “humiliated.”
Brad Guy uploaded a video to YouTube on Wednesday, explaining that he had gone to the gay bear festival with two friends, a couple, in the coastal town of Sitges in Spain’s Catalonia region.
The Australian said that he and his friends got talking to a group of men in a busy alleyway, where people were partying on the first day of the festival.
Guy explained that one of the men in the group “grabbed” his buttocks, which, although not consensual, “didn’t really register high on my warning scale.”
However, the situation worsened when another man allegedly pulled down Guy’s pants, exposing him to the crowd.
Guy said he started to shout to his friend for assistance because he was holding a drink and his wallet, and so was unable to pull his pants back up immediately.
He said that one of the guys gave him “another pinch” on the bum, which he said was “totally f***ing uncalled for, especially after my reaction.”
Guy then claimed he was assaulted by another man, which left him feeling like an “absolute wreck.”
He explained: “Another guy on the other side of me, f**k, he just put his hands on me in a place I didn’t want to be touched, and in a way that was totally uncalled for, in no way was there any, any slither of consent.
“Especially when I am in that situation raging, screaming, and yelling: ‘Pull my pants up.'”
Speaking to PinkNews, Guy said he “felt incredibly humiliated” after the alleged incident.
“There were so many people around and it was quite confronting,” he told PinkNews.
“Afterwards I just blamed myself and felt disgusted and ashamed. I literally broke down and hysterically sobbed to my boyfriend on the phone straight after. It was scary.”
The YouTuber, who said that he has had no response from Sitges Bear Week since he went public about the alleged incident on Wednesday, explained that the traumatic episode had “left a scar.”
Guy continued: “It’s taught me a lot about consent and how we should respect the personal space of others, especially in an environment like that.
“But I have lost confidence in befriending other gay [men] because I’m terrified it’ll happen again.”
Sitges Bears Week is an annual festival – attended by around 5,000 people – that takes place in September.
PinkNews has contacted the organisers of Sitges Bears Week for comment.
Revellers at Sitges Bears Week in 2015. (BOOM Sitges/YouTube)
In his video, Guy explained that the incident left him feeling “so violated” and “physically ill.”
Guy said he then ran away to the beach, where he called his boyfriend and was left “hysterically sobbing” down the phone.
He explained how, at first, he had thought he might have “invited that sort of behaviour.”
Guy said: “It took me so many months to process what had happened and whether my feelings were valid. And I felt like I deserved it, I felt like I put that sort of message out there that that’s the type of behaviour that I wanted to receive.
“And that is not how it works. That is not the world of consent. And that is not the world of sex.”
Guy opened up about the emotional impact of sexual assault. (Brad Guy/YouTube)
However, he said that his sadness “eventually turned into full-blooded, steam out of the ears, anger. And I wanted revenge.”
The YouTuber, who said he hoped that by going public with his experience of sexual assault he would help others, continued: “I don’t deserve that. I don’t deserve anyone to mistreat me and disrespect my body and disrespect my right to be in a place and feel safe.”
And the star had a message for his alleged abusers.
“Don’t f***ing touch me. Don’t ever f***ing touch me, unless I invite you to,” he said.
“Don’t ever touch anyone, unless they invite you to. Even when they invite you to, ask them again to make sure because consent is the most f***ing important thing.
Watch the video below:
“Don’t you ever violate anyone’s space. Don’t you ever violate anyone’s body. They don’t deserve it. They’re just trying to be themselves and have a good time.
“As soon you step into their space and touch them without their consent you are giving them the most extreme level of disrespect and you are causing trauma for that person.”
Guy added: “We need to open the dialogue and we need to talk about this. Don’t touch anyone without consent.”
