Lesbian raped by her father, uncle and friend to ‘make her straight’
Updated March 2019 | This article has been updated to reflect that the Twitter thread in question has since been deleted.
A lesbian has said she was raped at the age of 15 by her father in order to ‘make her straight.’
The South African woman, known only as Mubizana, also accused her uncle and his friend of raping her on the same day, when her grandmother had left home to visit relatives in Dennilton, Limpopo, in the north-east of the country.
The heartbreaking Twitter thread—which is no longer online—comes as South African LGBT people struggle to come to terms with multiple horrific attacks on the community, including the torture, rape, murder and burning of married lesbian couple Joey and Anisha van Niekerk.
Content warning: The following contains graphic descriptions of rape.
Mubizana wrote: “I was 15 years old when my father came into my room intoxicated and forcefully had sex with me. I never thought a father could do something like that to their child, their own blood.”
She continued: “He said to me ‘my child I hate what you’re doing and today I’m going to prove to you that you’re a woman, you’re not a man you’re a woman so you need to like one.’
“I knew what he was on about because my father hated the fact that I am a lesbian he was actually homophobic.
“He then pull off his shoes and took off his pants, while I was still in bed trying to understand why is he taking off his pants he said to me ‘Take off your clothes so that if you decide to open a case I will tell the police I didn’t rape you, you seduced me.’
“I tried to talk to him but he couldn’t listen, he even slapped me for begging him not to do it, he slapped me for asking him not to rape me,” Mubizana wrote.
“I was young and couldn’t fight him back, I was even afraid to scream so I couldn’t, he took off my clothes and then pushed me into the bed, by that time I was fully naked and he was wearing his t-shirt but nothing to cover his private parts.
“He then came on top of me, he took his penis and placed it into my vagina and then he raped me, I’ve cried and cried but he couldn’t stop, every time I close my eyes I remember what my father did to me and I always blame myself for everything that happened.”
She recalled that after her father raped her, he used the Bible to justify his actions.
He said a phrase in Zulu which translates as: “Your dad loves you and wants you to be a wife for all women, God created Adam and when he saw him lonely and formed Eve to live with her as his wife.”
Later the same day, she said her uncle came to her house with some friends, walked in on her naked and proceeded to rape her.
“His friends too were as bad as him and they helped him rape,” wrote Mubizana.
“One of them went to check if there was anyone coming, meanwhile the other one grabbed my hands and held them tight to the floor.
“They were older than me, I’m a woman and they overpowered me I couldn’t fight them back, I was so weak that I couldn’t even cry anymore, after my uncle was done. His friend came on top of me and then did the same.”
She said she had attempted suicide on more than one occasion since the attacks.
“I felt helpless, useless and like I could just die. Why didn’t they just kill me and save me from this pain?” she asked.
“It wasn’t easy and it’s not easy, I’ve tried to kill myself several times because this pain is too much.”
Mubizana went to her neighbour for help that night, she said, but though they went to the authorities, her father was never arrested.
LGBT people have long enjoyed legal protections and rights, but attacks are still prevalent (RAJESH JANTILAL/AFP/Getty)
“My neighbour took me to the police station to open a case then to the hospital, but still my father is a free man even today he’s still is a free man. Only my uncle and his friends were persecuted and not my father. But Why? ” she wrote.
After being raped, she said she “became a bad child in my family, my paternal family, everyone called me names, saying I hated my father because he left my mother.”
Mubizana said that every time she gets a new girlfriend, she has to explain why she’s not a virgin, and that the trauma from the rapes often stops her dead during sex, “because it reminds me of what my father, uncle and his friend did to me.
“It reminds me of everything I should forget about, it brings back memories and not just memories but bad memories.”
In February, a South African church was accused of beating gay men half to death and forcing them to pay for ‘damages’ after their sexualities were revealed.
LGBT rights protesters in Cape Town (RODGER BOSCH/AFP/GETTY)
And in the same month, a same-sex couple was allegedly abused and told to stay naked by police in a horrific viral video.
In April 2017, Nthabiseng Mokanyane’s close childhood friend Nonkie Smous was raped and murdered because she was a lesbian, leading 25-year-old Mokanyane to fight for LGBT equality.
Rape Crisis England and Wales works towards the elimination of sexual violence. If you’ve been affected by the issues raised in this story, you can access more information on their website or by calling the National Rape Crisis Helpline on 0808 802 9999. Rape Crisis Scotland’s helpline number is 08088 01 03 02.
Readers in the US are encouraged to contact RAINN, or the National Sexual Assault Hotline on 800-656-4673.
Readers in New Zealand encouraged to contact Rape Crisis on 0800 883 300, while readers in Australia can phone Rape & Domestic Violence Services Australia on 02 8585 0333.
Suicide is preventable. Readers who are affected by the issues raised in this story are encouraged to contact Samaritans on 116 123 (www.samaritans.org), or Mind on 0300 123 3393 (www.mind.org.uk). Readers in the US are encouraged to contact the National Suicide Prevention Line on 1-800-273-8255.
If you live in New Zealand, you can contact the Suicide Crisis Helpline on 0508 828 865. Readers in Australia are encouraged to phone Samaritans on 135 247.
