Fun

This is the ‘days without sex’ meme that’s taking over the internet

  • Jul 16 2018
  • Written by Josh Jackman

We’ve all been there at some point (pexels and twitter)

There’s a new meme for sexually starved people – and it’s hilarious.

From the gender-neutral big dick energy to the proliferation of bisexual lighting all over your screens, 2018 has been a stellar year for memes.

Atomic Blonde was one prominent user of bisexual lighting (Atomic Blonde)

And that’s without even mentioning the endlessly gratifying “I’m straight, I’m bi, I’m gay” meme which became ubiquitous on Twitter in May.

Pete Davidson and Ariana Grande, who inspired the phrase “big dick energy” (petedavidson/instagram)

But it’s apparently time to make some room in the meme universe for those among us who haven’t enjoyed any carnal pleasures for a while – whether it’s been less than a week or more than a year.

Or several years. No judging here (Pexels)

The basic format is to start your post with the phrase “day x without sex,” replacing the x with either your actual tally or a random funny number.

For instance, one person has tweeted: “day 30 without sex: i’ve been going to starbucks for the past three days straight just to hear somebody scream my name.”

Hey, whatever works for you.

Another version of the meme reads: “day 498 without sex: the demon i see in the corner of my room when i have sleep paralysis looking kinda cute now ngl.”

Considering that sleep paralysis is a condition in which the sufferer will occasionally awake to find their body paralysed and convinced there’s a dark presence near them, that’s a very thirsty tweeter.

Another person wrote: “196 days without sex: I ate a family size bag of hot Cheetos so something could tear my ass up.”

And again, it’s not for us to judge someone’s sexual preferences, as long as they don’t hurt anyone else.

One tweeter said: “24 days without sex: This cop told me to turn around and put my hands behind my back, i said ‘Yes daddy’ and bit my lip.

“He let me go and gave me the 1-800-sex addiction line.”

Another person wrote: “3 days without sex: wtf does a dick look like.”

It can be hard to remember, we guess.

One said: “369 days without sex, my mom hit me with a belt today and i moaned a little… were currently not speaking ‍♀️.”

That is more than a little awkward.

One particularly hilarious tweet read: “214 days without sex, f**k/marry/kill zodiac signs edition” before listing all the star signs with “f**k” beside them.

One person wrote: “Day 73 without sex: the voices in my head are starting to seduce me.”

Troubling.

And one said: “Day 279 without sex: going to a club just to start on a bouncer to get put in a choke lock.”

If you can relate to that – fair enough.

Yet another tweeter wrote: “Day 147 without sex: ate fruit gushers so I could feel something squirt in my mouth.”

Again, we get it.

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