Underwear designed to be worn during oral sex act as a ‘barrier to tastes and fluids’
Hey you, there, person who enjoys oral sex and has a vagina.
Just a quick q for you: have you ever felt so ashamed of the scent and fluid that comes out of your vagina that you’ve wanted to wear thin pants while your partner goes down on you so neither of you experience these repulsive drawbacks?
Hmm, we at PinkNews HQ haven’t either.
But, is a day truly a day if we haven’t created another thing for women to worry about?
Cue Lorals, a new selection of pants *so* thin that you can wear them and experience a mild form of oral sex with a vanilla set and inherent source of shame – i.e. your vagina’s real existence – no longer involved.
Yes, you’ve read this correctly. A company named Lorals is launching a set of very thin scented pants for women to wear during oral sex so they don’t have to worry about what their undercarriage smells or tastes like.
“We engineered Lorals to give you the ultimate freedom,” say the creators on their IndieGoGo page.
“Lorals are made of non-porous material that serves as a barrier to tastes, fluids, or anything that’s holding you back from completely enjoying your experience. The stretchiness of the material and its full coverage keep Lorals in place, so you can move around and go with the flow. And speaking of flow, tight seams on the bottom help contain fluids and ensure your private parts are covered,” they added.
Lorals, which “smell like vanilla,” have come with an array of troubling testimonials.
“I could feel waaaay more than I thought I would,” said one tester.
“It was so awesome to get it on after coming home from the gym, without having to worry about sweat or anything else.”
However, there is one benefit to putting on the pants if you menstruate – you can wear the pants if you want to have less messy oral sex on your period.
“Oral sex on your period (or anytime) just got easier,” writes the company.
The pants, which come in a bikini and shortie style, can be bought for £18.79 for a four pack.
But remember folks, you can only use them once.
Although we can applaud the company for encouraging women to seek out their pleasure, it’s difficult to challenge that notion if that can only be done through the help of vanilla-scented panties.
In the meantime, we’re looking at applications for the next body item of repulsion to be altered.
Hold tight, toe surgery.
