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Trans man is first person to give birth both before and after transitioning

Jess Glass December 13, 2017

Intersex children are often operated on (PHILIPPE HUGUEN/AFP/Getty Images)

A transgender man has made history by being the first person to give birth both before and after transitioning.

Kaci Sullivan gave birth to his second child, named Phoenix, earlier this month after his first child was born prior to his transition.

Speaking to the DailyMail, Kaci, a 30-year old from Winconsin, described his second pregnancy and the moment the child was born.

He said: “The moment the baby came out and I got to hear them cry was indescribable. It’s incredible to think that I had made this little human.

“After 26 weeks of morning sickness and seven days in labour it was such a beautiful moment.”

He continued: “We are just so happy and grateful and enjoying spending time together as a family. The baby is delightful, loving and sweet.

“The connection I’ve felt to them throughout my pregnancy has been an incredible privilege and the last nine months have brought my partner and I so close together.”

Kaci had previously given birth to his first child, named Grayson, in 2011. This was whilst Kaci was presenting as female and married to his ex-husband.

pregnant

He described how difficult the pregnancy was when faced with the gendered expectations that he did not truly meet.

Kaci said: “Throughout the experience, I prayed to connect with womanhood, to identify with what was happening to my body, but I couldn’t.

“I felt so hopeless and lost. I wanted to die. I fell into such a dark place and I was terrified to bring a baby into that darkness with me.

“But the moment they put him in my arms it was bliss. Immediately I loved him like I had never loved anything or anyone and I felt such a surge of duty to him.”

A few months after the birth of Grayson, Kaci came out as transgender. This lead to his relationship with his ex-husband breaking down, and the pair divorced.

In 2014, Kaci met his current partner Steven. After a pregnancy scare in 2016, the pair decided to actively try for a baby.

Baby kiss

Navigating pregnancy as a trans man can bring its own challenges but Kaci was able to work past some of the gendered expectations.

He said: “Because I don’t see pregnancy as inherently feminine, and because I don’t subscribe to make-believe gender roles, I wasn’t threatened by the idea of pregnancy.”

“It didn’t make me feel any less masculine.”

Kaci continued: “As my bump grew bigger and bigger I got nervous going out in public because people would stare. They noticed my abnormal shape.

“There was a lot of anxiety but the most important thing for me was sending the message that pregnancy is not a gendered thing.”

Kaci and Steven plan to raise their child without gendered expectations, and when asked the question ‘is it a boy or a girl’ about Phoenix, Kaci has a simple answer: no.

He said: “I wish people realized that they’re not asking me about the baby’s gender identity.”

“There is no way anyone could know that. They’re asking me what my baby’s genitals look like. This is a creepy question when we break it down.”

He continued: “We don’t need to be sexualising little children. Nobody but your child should be revealing their gender.”

Line of stuffed toys
(Photo: Creative Commons)

The couple will give their child non-gendered clothing and a wide variety of toys, so that they can “express themselves in the way that feels right”.

Kaci added: “Our sex and gender identity have nothing to do with socially constructed gender roles. These are three entirely separate concepts.

“The architecture of your brain does not change depending on what color you are dressed in as a baby.”

This summer, a BBC experiment showed just how much gender stereotypes affect how we play with children based on their name and the clothes they wear.

More: Equality, LGBT, Trans, trans family, trans man, trans parent, Transgender, transgender parent, US

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