Comedian Joel Creasey reveals his carby coming out story

Joseph McCormick November 15, 2017
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Australian comedian Joel Creasey opened up about his coming out story on Wednesday, hours after Australians voted Yes to same-sex marriage.

61.6 percent of Australians said Yes to same-sex marriage in a non-binding plebiscite.

Speaking at the GQ Men of the Year Awards in Sydney on Wednesday, hours after the results were announced, Creasey talked about his own coming out story.

He started with an account of how he thought the coming out might go, saying: “I was 16 and I was going to sit my parents down and say, ‘mum and dad, I’m gay.’ And they’d say, ‘get out of here you homo,’ and I was going to run away from home … and then two weeks later they’d come and find me on a street corner singing, ‘It’s a hard knock life.'”

But going on he told the funny story of how it actually happened.

He said: “I sat my parents down and told them I’m gay and they said, ‘cool, we’re having pasta for dinner.’ I said, ‘I don’t think you heard me, I said I’m gay. I can’t eat f**king carbs anymore can I?!'”

Going on, Creasey said he regularly used to ask at what point his parents suspected he might be gay.

“Was it when I was four and my mum was singing me Mary Had A Little Lamb and I said, “do you know anything from Cats?'” he said.

“Was it when I was seven and I was banned from watching 101 Dalmatians because I used to cry at the end when Cruella de Ville DIDN’T win? I was like, ‘give her the puppy coat, it’s gorgeous.’

“Was it when I was one and my mum was breastfeeding me and I stopped her and said, ‘look, let’s just be friends’?”

Creasey recently opened up in his autobiography about having a relationship with an AFL footballer.

And as with top-flight soccer, that certainly doesn’t mean that there are no gay players, just that none are out.

That was confirmed this week by Australian comedian Joel Creasey, who has spoken about a romance with a gay AFL footballer in his new memoir Thirsty: Confessions of a Fame Whore.

Aussie Rules Football (Getty Images)
Aussie Rules Football (Getty Images)

An excerpt from the book has been printed in the Herald Sun and Creasey told the newspaper that he wouldn’t out the player in question.

Related: These Australian football players really want a gay player to come out

“I’m very good at keeping secrets so he will be all right,” he said.

“I give just enough away. He’s a lovely guy.”

The issue of gay footballers has been rumbling in Australia for several years, and the conversation has only got louder during the debate over same-sex marriage as the postal vote continues.

Back in 2010, one player said that any gay players should remain closeted because the AFL is “not ready for it”.

“Imagine the publicity associated with a current player admitting he’s gay,” he said.

“It would be international news and could break the fabric of a club.”

Two years later another player suggested there was a “sick fascination” with players’ sexuality among some in the public while the game itself had moved to a culture of “great acceptance”.

The AFL launched a major anti-homophobia drive the same year.

However, the problem of homophobia still continues in the game. One commentator labelled a player a “big poofter” for apparently over-celebrating his 150th game.

Soon after, the AFL publicly declared its support for same-sex marriage.


An Aussie Rules Footballer (Getty Images)
An Aussie Rules Footballer (Getty Images)

“The AFL will keep saying no matter how many times it takes, that our game does not tolerate discrimination in any form, be that sexual identity, gender, race (or) religious views,” said league boss Gillion McLachlan.

“We also support the position of marriage equality for all people.”

The League publicly restated that support last month as the campaign for equal marriage continued.

Related: What the hell is going on with same-sex marriage in Australia?

In his book extract, Creasey talks about the lack of out players and why he knows there’s definitely at least one gay AFL star.

“I know there’s been a push for years for an AFL player to come out of the closet, too,” he writes,

“A player coming out would certainly help stigma, but I don’t think anyone should be forced into coming out.”

He continues: “It always makes me laugh when conservatives say, ‘There aren’t any gay players in the AFL’.

“As I mentioned, I live near Etihad Stadium. I can assure you there are – I slept with one.

“I’m not in the business of outing people either, though. And we only slept together a couple of times.

“But I always did love the juxtaposition of him coming over after a game to me lying on the couch watching The Devil Wears Prada.”

Meanwhile, despite initially being nominated to play, transgender footballer Hannah Mouncey was blocked by the Australian’s Women’s Football League from its draft.

Related topics: afl, Australia, Australian Football League, comedian, joel creasy

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