Menu

InstagramTwitterYouTubeFacebookSnapchat
Globe Icon
Join and support LGBT+ journalism

Join

and support
LGBT+ journalism

Community

This trans woman spent years living in fear because of her gender identity

Meka Beresford February 5, 2017

This trans woman has bravely opened up about how she lived her life in fear because of her gender identity.

35-year-old Allysa Call said that she lived in secret for 10 years because she was scared of peoples reactions, a product of growing up in a small town.

“I kept everything a secret because I was ashamed of my past and of the potential of what people would say,” she told the Exeter Express & Echo.

“I was five years old when I realised that I was different. When you are younger, you start to develop your personality and who you are and at the age of five I just wanted to do girly things. I wanted to dress up in girl’s clothes and I felt like I just didn’t fit in with boys.

“When you are a teenager, you know who you are attracted to and I knew at the age of 16 I was attracted to boys.

“Even back then I felt very feminine and that is when I came out as gay but I realised very quickly that I didn’t identify as being male. It was like my body was not in line with my brain.”

Call struggled at school, but began to grow used to her identity at college where she said she made a lot of friends.

“I was so self-conscious when I was at high school and I tried my best to fit in but that wasn’t really me so I just went back to trying to survive in high school.

“College is where I felt most comfortable education wise and I made lots of friends there with whom I am still friends today.”

Allysa struggled to be open with her family and friend about her gender identity, but after eventually coming out they were nothing but supportive.

“When I was growing up I wasn’t very confident and I found it hard telling my family. When it all came out they would sometimes make mistakes.

“Other people didn’t realise how long that I had been feeling like that and it does take time for people to get used to you being one way and then suddenly being another way.

Allysa and her family suffered homophobic abuse during her transition, and at one point they had to move house because of an incredibly homophobic and transphobic neighbour.

“When Allysa was younger when she was having everything done she had bricks thrown through her windows, her front door kicked in and eggs chucked at her,” said Allysa’s twin brother Matt.

“It’s the hardest thing as a family because you just feel helpless and we were not brought up to be like that why people behave like that. It’s unacceptable and disgraceful.”

The NHS worker decided to go public with her story after she was invited onto Jeremy Kyle with her twin brother. The ITV show was looking to share inspiring stories such as Allysa’s.

Since then, she has been thrust into the public eye and is having to learn how to cope with some negative comments online.

“I still have feelings and obviously the nasty comments do affect me but over the years I have learned to build a thicker skin.

“And as you get older you learn about people more and the people that leave the negative comments I don’t think that they have a problem with me, but instead I think that the problem is with them,” she added.

More: LGBT, Trans, Transgender

Click to comment

Swipe sideways to view more posts!

Dismiss

Loading ...

Close icon