Brian Normoyle: Gathering Storm: Miss California Trying to Redefine Traditional Breasts for the Rest of Us

For many thousands of years, across every culture and continent, women have known traditional or “natural” breasts to be those that God — or nature — gave them. To think otherwise flies in the face of millennia of human history and spiritual doctrine. Prejean’s Bible repeatedly reminds us we are made in God’s perfect image while warning us against exchanging the “natural” use of our bodies for those deemed “unnatural.” And, while one could argue the rights to privacy and personal freedom are inherent in our nation’s founding democratic principles and that every American has a right to his/her own life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, organizations like NOM — for whom she’s now a spokesperson — Focus on the Family and the Family Research Council repeatedly admonish us that life in America would be better if theology and biblical doctrine were the primary determinant of civil law and personal liberties.

While someone else was footing the bill, Prejean made the choice to defy her God’s perfect design and creation of her and to rebel against the intended and “natural” purpose of her mammaries: namely, the nursing of babies rather than the visual attraction sufficient enough to win a vanity contest. Moreover, if her teeth aren’t capped, I’m betting they were braced; and I’d also put money down on the fact that Prejean has, at some point, performed other “unnatural” acts with her organs like chewing gum, wearing eye-glasses, enjoying a Diet Coke or two or even… um… er, well, you get the idea.

So, Carrie, you may find full civil equality for all Americans to be “unnatural” and not “Biblically correct,” but, frankly, neither are your Jugs for Jesus and your Caps for Christ. “No Offense.” See Brian Normoyle: Gathering Storm: Miss California Trying to Redefine Traditional Breasts for the Rest of Us