After the break-up, what about the lake house?
IT was a perfect party — vodka lemonade on a dock overlooking a lake, dozens of close friends, a cool misty night in the country a couple of hours north of New York.
Inside, the house spoke of a passionate interest in style, and of a committed relationship. Silhouettes of the couple who owned the house hung on a wall in the master bedroom; the couple’s nickname — Benford — was spelled out in large letters leaning against a wall in the kitchen.
But the couple, Benjamin Dixon, 31, and Bradford Shellhammer, 33, who had planned the evening as a commitment ceremony, had broken up three months earlier. Still, with airplane tickets purchased by some of the guests, a catering deposit paid and a house they haven’t been able to sell, they figured it made sense to go ahead and have a party anyway.
Their tale of lost love has a familiar arc — love sparks, then blooms; lives intertwine; moments are lost and misunderstandings creep in; eventually the two begin to live as strangers — and an epilogue that has become increasingly familiar as well, as unwanted houses become prisons rather than cocoons.
Rather than being a glossy testament to their taste and their partnership, their house in Stanfordville, in Dutchess County, is now a dead weight that entangles them and makes it impossible to move on. Having bought it and an apartment in Manhattan at the height of the real estate boom (and having made an agreement with a third partner in their lake house property not to sell it until December 2009), they are left with joint custody of two large mortgages. They are also left with two carefully decorated homes filled with one-of-a-kind accessories found on eBay and quirky furnishings by high-end designers like the Dutch collective Droog that are reminders of what came before and, Mr. Dixon said, “big reminders of what was supposed to be.”
See After the break-up, what about the lake house?
New York Times
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As of Wednesday, gay couples in St. Paul, Minnesota, can get domestic partnerships. The state capital joined two other cities in that state in approving a resolution that allowed for domestic partnerships
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Gay marriage and the date debate
Nearly nine months after California voters banned same-sex marriage in the state, gay marriage supporters are ready to ask them to overturn Proposition 8. They’re just not sure when to ask: In November 2010 or November 2012.
Choosing a date involves more than sifting through the polling, community meetings and consultants’ reports that have filled the time since last fall’s election with soul-searching and finger-pointing among supporters, culminating in a meeting of the movement’s leaders Saturday in San Bernardino.
Generating enthusiasm for a grassroots campaign will also be a heart-based decision, one that has split same-sex couples even in Kern County, where 75 percent of voters backed Prop. 8.
Bakersfield resident Jade Haley wants an initiative in 2010. Her partner Alee Gamino thinks that’s too soon. Gamino’s Catholic mother still refers to Haley as “she” and has no contact with them as a couple, who are raising Gamino’s teenage daughter from a previous relationship.
Churches’ influence
On Sundays, Gamino, 34, goes to church twice. She attends a Catholic service solo with her mom in the morning and goes to a Metropolitan Community Church with her partner in the evening. “The churches have thousands and thousands of people ready to go against us,” said Gamino. She looked at 70 people who came to a Unitarian Universalist Church on Thursday to talk about the movement’s next step. “All we have is what’s in this room.”
Still, Gamino was among only a dozen people at the Bakersfield meeting called by Marriage Equality USA who supported waiting until 2012. The sentiment for a vote next year echoed one at a similar gathering in San Francisco, while gatherings in liberal bastions such as Oakland and Berkeley leaned toward 2012.
“The reaction was really mixed,” said Pam Brown, Marriage Equality USA’s political director, who compiled information from the organization’s “Get Engaged” tour of 40 California cities over the past several weeks. “A lot of people who wanted to wait until 2012 wanted to see what the plan was first before they committed.”
A nonbinding straw poll of leaders gathered Saturday in San Bernardino to plan the movement’s next step found that 93 people voted to go in 2010, 49 in 2012 and 20 were undecided. Organizers expect to officially decide when to return to the ballot in a couple of weeks. If they decide on November 2010, the deadline to have ballot language submitted to the attorney general is Sept. 25.
Faults not addressed
This month, several groups of same-sex marriage supporters said not enough has been done to address the faults of last year’s campaign in time to mount a winning drive next year.
See Gay marriage and the date debate
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Original source : http://gay_blog.blogspot.com/2009/07/gay-marriage-…
Homosexuals dispel myth of “progressive”
Each year in Germany, from the end of June through August, gay and lesbian rights’ activists celebrate the “Stonewall” uprising – named after a gay bar on Christopher Street in New York, where homosexuals fought back against police brutality in 1969.
Participants in the German parades known as “Christopher Street Day” join other activists around the world who take to the streets to demonstrate gay pride and demand greater freedoms.
Some of those freedoms would include expanded civil rights. In Germany, civil unions, for instance, have been permitted among same-sex couples since 2001, but full marriages are not. Homosexual couples therefore do not enjoy the same rights as married heterosexual couples when it comes to taxes, retirement, civil servant benefits, or adoption law.
For more on gay and lesbian rights and the community in Germany, click on the links below, or listen to this week’s “Living in Germany” program to hear a more personal account of a homosexual civil union.
DW-WORLD.DE
Audios and videos on the topic
See Homosexuals dispel myth of “progressive” Germany Deutsche Welle
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Original source : http://gay_blog.blogspot.com/2009/07/homosexuals-d…
Swedish lesbians suck sperm banks dry
Sweden’s fertility clinics are racking up a serious backlog of people waiting for artificial insemination, due in part to a “spike” in demand from lesbian couples for vital supplies of man juice.
So bad have things got that expectant customers at Sahlgrenska University Hospital in Gothenburg are now forced to wait 18 months for treatment.
See Swedish lesbians suck sperm banks dry
Register
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DC Law Helps Lesbian Couples Become Moms
A new D.C. law is making it a lot easier for a newborn to have two mommies from birth. According to the law, which went into effect on July 18, the District of Columbia will confer “the status of legal parent on both lesbian mothers who plan a child using donor insemination,” Nancy Polikoff reports.
In the past, the birth mother’s partner would have to go through an adoption process to become a legal parent of the child; now, the second mommy just needs to fill out some paperwork to demonstrate her “written consent” of parenthood. Polikoff notes that the new law is “marital status-neutral and gender-neutral,” so it will change parenthood policy in a couple of other situations as well:
See DC Law Helps Lesbian Couples Become Moms Washington City Paper
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Married lesbian couple seeks protection in India
LUCKNOW: Even as the country debates pros and cons of legalising the same sex marriages and the Central government finds itself in a fix over the issue, a lesbian couple tied nuptial knot defying all social norms in Muzaffarnagar, known for honour killings and fundamentalist diktats by caste-based panchayats.
This is not all. Two days after the incident hit the headlines, the Muzaffarnagar district administration received another application for same sex marriage from another lesbian couple. While in the first case, officers have provided security to the newly wedded, they have not given permission to the second couple fearing a backlash from the community. Significantly, in both the cases, the couples belong to low income group and are not highly educated.
In the first case, Komal Sharma and Pinki Kashyap entered into wedlock and left their families to live together. The couple hails from Dayanand Nagar, a small locality in Shamli tehsil of Muzaffarnagar district. While Komal belongs to a Brahmin family and is educated till class XI, Pinki hails from an other backward class family and has studied only till class VIII. Komal’s father Rajendra Sharma is with home guard and Pinki’s father Hariram runs a small dairy.
The two girls met three months back in a vocational training centre where both had enrolled for a course in stitching. The friendship soon turned into love and they got secretly married through Arya Samaj rituals at a temple in Muzaffarnagar. They also to have entered wedlock legally through a court marriage in Delhi. While Pinki posed as the groom, Komal dressed as a bride.
The couple kept their marriage a secret till July 23, the day they left their families. According to police, Pinki came to Komal’s house in the morning of July 23 when Komal was alone with her two younger siblings. The duo gave sleeping pills mixed in cold drink to the Komal’s younger brother and sister and left the house. The two girls also filed an application in the office of Senior Superintendent of Police (SSP), Muzaffarnagar, complaining that they have threat to their lives from their families. See Married woman marries her ‘girlfriend’ in west UP Times of India
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Original source : http://gay_blog.blogspot.com/2009/07/married-lesbi…
New straw poll of gay marriage leaders: Overturn Prop 8 in 2010
A straw poll of same sex marraige leaders gathered in San Bernardino Saturday just came in: The majority want to return to the ballot in 2010 to try to overturn Proposition 8. Final count of the nonbinding measure: 93 people voted to go in 2010, 49 in 2012 and 20 undecided.
The next step: Leaders will return to their organizations and then a final decision will be made in a couple of weeks. If they’re going to go for it in 2010, they’d better hurry. Ballot language is due to the Attorney General by Sept. 25.
Oh, yeah. And they still need a leader. And a leadership structure. And a decision-making process.
With that in mind, here’s a juicy rumor for you: Would President Obama confidante Steve Hildebrand be interested in coming out to California to lead the next same sex marriage ballot iniative campaign?
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Original source : http://gay_blog.blogspot.com/2009/07/new-straw-pol…
Gay spouses to get AAA discounts Florida Times-Union -
AAA Auto Club South will now allow same-sex married couples to receive spousal discounts under AAA’s Associate Membership program, a rights group that advocates for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people announced Thursday.
The company met with members of Equality Florida on Wednesday after the group received calls from gay couples who had been denied family memberships.
“Our policy does include gay and lesbian spouses, wherever they were married. Whether in other states or countries, they qualify,” said Tom O’Brien, president and chief executive officer of AAA Auto Club South, in a statement.
Gay marriage is not legal in Florida but has been approved in other states.
See Gay spouses to get AAA discounts
Florida Times-Union -
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Human Rights Campaign PAC, Gay & Lesbian Victory Fund Endorse Anthony Woods For U.S. Congress
The Human Rights Campaign PAC, the nation’s largest lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender civil rights organization, and the Gay & Lesbian Victory Fund, which works to grow the number of openly LGBT elected officials across the U.S., announced today the endorsement of Anthony Woods for U.S. Congress. Woods, who is running in the September 1 Special Election for California’s 10th Congressional District, earned the Bronze Star after serving two tours in Iraq in the U.S. Army. He was honorably discharged after challenging the military’s “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” law.
“The Human Rights Campaign is proud to endorse Anthony Woods, a veteran of the Iraq war and steadfast advocate for our community, to become the next U.S. Congressman from California’s 10th district,” said Human Rights Campaign President Joe Solmonese. “Anthony hasn’t just shown his support on issues of LGBT equality, he’s lived them — especially the repeal of ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.’ Anthony’s support of marriage equality will also be important as we work to repeal Proposition 8, which stripped marriage rights away for California’s same-sex couples. There is no doubt that Anthony will be a role model for LGBT youth, and we applaud his continuing service to our country.”
“Anthony Woods is an exciting candidate with a tremendous record of accomplishment. He’s also running an impressive campaign. Anthony has assembled a solid campaign team that understands what it will take to win this extremely competitive race. We need more leaders like Anthony Woods in the U.S. Congress, so we are proud to endorse him,” said Chuck Wolfe, president of the Gay & Lesbian Victory Fund. “His will be an authentic voice not only for the people of California’s 10th Congressional District, but for the millions of Americans for whom the promise of equality remains unfulfilled.”
“I am honored and proud to earn the support of Human Rights Campaign and the Gay & Lesbian Victory Fund,” said Anthony Woods, candidate for California’s 10th Congressional District. “They’re working to make sure America lives up to its promise of equality under the law, which is something I’ll fight for in Congress.”
Anthony Woods was born and raised in Fairfield, California. He is a graduate of West Point and earned his masters degree from the Kennedy School of Government at Harvard University. In addition to his years of service in the Army, Woods has worked on economic policy issues in both the public and private sectors. To learn more visit: www.AnthonyWoodsForCongress.com.
The Human Rights Campaign is America’s largest civil rights organization working to achieve lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender equality. By inspiring and engaging all Americans, HRC strives to end discrimination against LGBT citizens and realize a nation that achieves fundamental fairness and equality for all.
The Gay & Lesbian Victory Fund is the only national organization dedicated to increasing the number of openly LGBT elected officials at all levels of government in the U.S.
* Tags = gay men gay news lesbian news transgender bisexual
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Original source : http://gay_blog.blogspot.com/2009/07/human-rights-…
As of Wednesday, gay couples in St. Paul, Minnesota, can get domestic partnerships. The state capital joined two other cities in that state in approving a resolution that allowed for domestic partnerships
* Tags = gay men gay news lesbian news transgender bisexual
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Original source : http://gay_blog.blogspot.com/2009/07/st_26.html…
Gay marriage and the date debate
Nearly nine months after California voters banned same-sex marriage in the state, gay marriage supporters are ready to ask them to overturn Proposition 8. They’re just not sure when to ask: In November 2010 or November 2012. Choosing a date involves more than sifting through the polling, community meetings and consultants’ reports that have filled the time since last fall’s election with soul-searching and finger-pointing among supporters, culminating in a meeting of the movement’s leaders Saturday in San Bernardino. Generating enthusiasm for a grassroots campaign will also be a heart-based decision, one that has split same-sex couples even in Kern County, where 75 percent of voters backed Prop. 8. Bakersfield resident Jade Haley wants an initiative in 2010. Her partner Alee Gamino thinks that’s too soon. Gamino’s Catholic mother still refers to Haley as “she” and has no contact with them as a couple, who are raising Gamino’s teenage daughter from a previous relationship. On Sundays, Gamino, 34, goes to church twice. She attends a Catholic service solo with her mom in the morning and goes to a Metropolitan Community Church with her partner in the evening. “The churches have thousands and thousands of people ready to go against us,” said Gamino. She looked at 70 people who came to a Unitarian Universalist Church on Thursday to talk about the movement’s next step. “All we have is what’s in this room.” Still, Gamino was among only a dozen people at the Bakersfield meeting called by Marriage Equality USA who supported waiting until 2012. The sentiment for a vote next year echoed one at a similar gathering in San Francisco, while gatherings in liberal bastions such as Oakland and Berkeley leaned toward 2012. “The reaction was really mixed,” said Pam Brown, Marriage Equality USA’s political director, who compiled information from the organization’s “Get Engaged” tour of 40 California cities over the past several weeks. “A lot of people who wanted to wait until 2012 wanted to see what the plan was first before they committed.” A nonbinding straw poll of leaders gathered Saturday in San Bernardino to plan the movement’s next step found that 93 people voted to go in 2010, 49 in 2012 and 20 were undecided. Organizers expect to officially decide when to return to the ballot in a couple of weeks. If they decide on November 2010, the deadline to have ballot language submitted to the attorney general is Sept. 25. This month, several groups of same-sex marriage supporters said not enough has been done to address the faults of last year’s campaign in time to mount a winning drive next year.Churches’ influence
Faults not addressed
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Original source : http://gay_blog.blogspot.com/2009/07/gay-marriage-…
Homosexuals dispel myth of “progressive”
Each year in Germany, from the end of June through August, gay and lesbian rights’ activists celebrate the “Stonewall” uprising – named after a gay bar on Christopher Street in New York, where homosexuals fought back against police brutality in 1969.
Participants in the German parades known as “Christopher Street Day” join other activists around the world who take to the streets to demonstrate gay pride and demand greater freedoms.
Some of those freedoms would include expanded civil rights. In Germany, civil unions, for instance, have been permitted among same-sex couples since 2001, but full marriages are not. Homosexual couples therefore do not enjoy the same rights as married heterosexual couples when it comes to taxes, retirement, civil servant benefits, or adoption law.
For more on gay and lesbian rights and the community in Germany, click on the links below, or listen to this week’s “Living in Germany” program to hear a more personal account of a homosexual civil union.
DW-WORLD.DE
Audios and videos on the topic
See Homosexuals dispel myth of “progressive” Germany Deutsche Welle
* Tags = gay men gay news lesbian news transgender bisexual
| Published by |
|
Original source : http://gay_blog.blogspot.com/2009/07/homosexuals-d…
Swedish lesbians suck sperm banks dry
Sweden’s fertility clinics are racking up a serious backlog of people waiting for artificial insemination, due in part to a “spike” in demand from lesbian couples for vital supplies of man juice.
So bad have things got that expectant customers at Sahlgrenska University Hospital in Gothenburg are now forced to wait 18 months for treatment.
See Swedish lesbians suck sperm banks dry
Register
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Original source : http://gay_blog.blogspot.com/2009/07/swedish-lesbi…
DC Law Helps Lesbian Couples Become Moms
A new D.C. law is making it a lot easier for a newborn to have two mommies from birth. According to the law, which went into effect on July 18, the District of Columbia will confer “the status of legal parent on both lesbian mothers who plan a child using donor insemination,” Nancy Polikoff reports.
In the past, the birth mother’s partner would have to go through an adoption process to become a legal parent of the child; now, the second mommy just needs to fill out some paperwork to demonstrate her “written consent” of parenthood. Polikoff notes that the new law is “marital status-neutral and gender-neutral,” so it will change parenthood policy in a couple of other situations as well:
See DC Law Helps Lesbian Couples Become Moms Washington City Paper
* Tags = gay men gay news lesbian news transgender bisexual
| Published by |
|
Original source : http://gay_blog.blogspot.com/2009/07/dc-law-helps-…
Married lesbian couple seeks protection in India
LUCKNOW: Even as the country debates pros and cons of legalising the same sex marriages and the Central government finds itself in a fix over the issue, a lesbian couple tied nuptial knot defying all social norms in Muzaffarnagar, known for honour killings and fundamentalist diktats by caste-based panchayats.
This is not all. Two days after the incident hit the headlines, the Muzaffarnagar district administration received another application for same sex marriage from another lesbian couple. While in the first case, officers have provided security to the newly wedded, they have not given permission to the second couple fearing a backlash from the community. Significantly, in both the cases, the couples belong to low income group and are not highly educated.
In the first case, Komal Sharma and Pinki Kashyap entered into wedlock and left their families to live together. The couple hails from Dayanand Nagar, a small locality in Shamli tehsil of Muzaffarnagar district. While Komal belongs to a Brahmin family and is educated till class XI, Pinki hails from an other backward class family and has studied only till class VIII. Komal’s father Rajendra Sharma is with home guard and Pinki’s father Hariram runs a small dairy.
The two girls met three months back in a vocational training centre where both had enrolled for a course in stitching. The friendship soon turned into love and they got secretly married through Arya Samaj rituals at a temple in Muzaffarnagar. They also to have entered wedlock legally through a court marriage in Delhi. While Pinki posed as the groom, Komal dressed as a bride.
The couple kept their marriage a secret till July 23, the day they left their families. According to police, Pinki came to Komal’s house in the morning of July 23 when Komal was alone with her two younger siblings. The duo gave sleeping pills mixed in cold drink to the Komal’s younger brother and sister and left the house. The two girls also filed an application in the office of Senior Superintendent of Police (SSP), Muzaffarnagar, complaining that they have threat to their lives from their families. See Married woman marries her ‘girlfriend’ in west UP Times of India
* Tags = gay men gay news lesbian news transgender bisexual
| Published by |
|
Original source : http://gay_blog.blogspot.com/2009/07/married-lesbi…
New straw poll of gay marriage leaders: Overturn Prop 8 in 2010
A straw poll of same sex marraige leaders gathered in San Bernardino Saturday just came in: The majority want to return to the ballot in 2010 to try to overturn Proposition 8. Final count of the nonbinding measure: 93 people voted to go in 2010, 49 in 2012 and 20 undecided.
The next step: Leaders will return to their organizations and then a final decision will be made in a couple of weeks. If they’re going to go for it in 2010, they’d better hurry. Ballot language is due to the Attorney General by Sept. 25.
Oh, yeah. And they still need a leader. And a leadership structure. And a decision-making process.
With that in mind, here’s a juicy rumor for you: Would President Obama confidante Steve Hildebrand be interested in coming out to California to lead the next same sex marriage ballot iniative campaign?
* Tags = gay men gay news lesbian news transgender bisexual
| Published by |
|
Original source : http://gay_blog.blogspot.com/2009/07/new-straw-pol…
Gay spouses to get AAA discounts Florida Times-Union -
AAA Auto Club South will now allow same-sex married couples to receive spousal discounts under AAA’s Associate Membership program, a rights group that advocates for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people announced Thursday.
The company met with members of Equality Florida on Wednesday after the group received calls from gay couples who had been denied family memberships.
“Our policy does include gay and lesbian spouses, wherever they were married. Whether in other states or countries, they qualify,” said Tom O’Brien, president and chief executive officer of AAA Auto Club South, in a statement.
Gay marriage is not legal in Florida but has been approved in other states.
See Gay spouses to get AAA discounts
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Original source : http://gay_blog.blogspot.com/2009/07/gay-spouses-t…
Human Rights Campaign PAC, Gay & Lesbian Victory Fund Endorse Anthony Woods For U.S. Congress
The Human Rights Campaign PAC, the nation’s largest lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender civil rights organization, and the Gay & Lesbian Victory Fund, which works to grow the number of openly LGBT elected officials across the U.S., announced today the endorsement of Anthony Woods for U.S. Congress. Woods, who is running in the September 1 Special Election for California’s 10th Congressional District, earned the Bronze Star after serving two tours in Iraq in the U.S. Army. He was honorably discharged after challenging the military’s “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” law.
“The Human Rights Campaign is proud to endorse Anthony Woods, a veteran of the Iraq war and steadfast advocate for our community, to become the next U.S. Congressman from California’s 10th district,” said Human Rights Campaign President Joe Solmonese. “Anthony hasn’t just shown his support on issues of LGBT equality, he’s lived them — especially the repeal of ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.’ Anthony’s support of marriage equality will also be important as we work to repeal Proposition 8, which stripped marriage rights away for California’s same-sex couples. There is no doubt that Anthony will be a role model for LGBT youth, and we applaud his continuing service to our country.”
“Anthony Woods is an exciting candidate with a tremendous record of accomplishment. He’s also running an impressive campaign. Anthony has assembled a solid campaign team that understands what it will take to win this extremely competitive race. We need more leaders like Anthony Woods in the U.S. Congress, so we are proud to endorse him,” said Chuck Wolfe, president of the Gay & Lesbian Victory Fund. “His will be an authentic voice not only for the people of California’s 10th Congressional District, but for the millions of Americans for whom the promise of equality remains unfulfilled.”
“I am honored and proud to earn the support of Human Rights Campaign and the Gay & Lesbian Victory Fund,” said Anthony Woods, candidate for California’s 10th Congressional District. “They’re working to make sure America lives up to its promise of equality under the law, which is something I’ll fight for in Congress.”
Anthony Woods was born and raised in Fairfield, California. He is a graduate of West Point and earned his masters degree from the Kennedy School of Government at Harvard University. In addition to his years of service in the Army, Woods has worked on economic policy issues in both the public and private sectors. To learn more visit: www.AnthonyWoodsForCongress.com.
The Human Rights Campaign is America’s largest civil rights organization working to achieve lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender equality. By inspiring and engaging all Americans, HRC strives to end discrimination against LGBT citizens and realize a nation that achieves fundamental fairness and equality for all.
The Gay & Lesbian Victory Fund is the only national organization dedicated to increasing the number of openly LGBT elected officials at all levels of government in the U.S.
* Tags = gay men gay news lesbian news transgender bisexual
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Original source : http://gay_blog.blogspot.com/2009/07/human-rights-…
