Gay seniors embrace a newfound openness

Posted on June 20, 2009 
Filed Under Uncategorized

Marvin was speaking to his in November 2003. The conversation halted briefly as looked away, collecting a thought that had waited to surface.

“You know what?” he said, looking up at his doctor. “I’m .”

At age 61, married more than 30 years, this was an unlikely .

“It was the first time I’d ever put words to that,” said. “It was like an epiphany. And then I looked back on my life and said, ‘You dummy, of course you are.’ ” , now 67, grew up in Chicago, part of a conventional . He found himself interested in the — still highly taboo at the time — but resolved that he was “straight but curious.”

Conforming to the of the time, he married in his mid-20s. “I can’t really say I was madly in . This was a I knew and we had the same sets of . It seemed a good fit.”

Together they had two sons, were active in their synagogue, entertained regularly and worked through the and downs of .

“I was Mr. Straight,” said. “There were certain things in life that you do, and I would just go and do them. I was fascinated by this other world. The world had this attraction. But I just never did anything with it. It was just there.”

In the , began depression. He went into counseling and got on but could never identify the source of his . Until that day in 2003, in his ’s chair.

“My wife at first was shocked,” he said. “But she was also glad I’d finally figured out why at times I was non-functional. She’s a wonderful and was very supportive of me through all of this.”
See Gay seniors embrace a newfound openness

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