Lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender marriages thrive

Posted on May 29, 2009
Filed Under Uncategorized

This spring my life-partner and I are celebrating our 10th anniversary together. While some might say that 10 years of marriage is no big deal — even in this age of high divorce rates — clearly it is a milestone year, and especially for a gay couple like us. I should note from the start that I do not place marriage in quotation marks, as though ours somehow doesn’t measure up; our marriage is different in some ways and very much the same in others, but it is certainly not less. We know what a precious gift we have in each other.
Our love and commitment, in fact, are as strong and vital as in the best heterosexual marriages, often more so.
Why? Because like all successful lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) marriages, ours thrives despite formidable odds, any one of which would crush many heterosexual marriages. Little wonder LGBT friends and acquaintances tell us our 10 years is actually twenty, even 30 — in straight years.
No one should be surprised by this perception. In place of the myriad ways that heterosexual marriages are incorporated, supported, celebrated and promoted ours’ are denied, excluded, discouraged and condemned. Marriage of any type is, of course, not always easy, even if strong and under the best of circumstances. Imagine for a moment though people praying for your marriage to fail; widespread preaching and protesting against it; laws and constitutional amendments enacted that are overtly hostile to your family; hospitals blocking you from your spouse’s bedside; having your children torn from your life when your spouse, the biological parent, dies; or being unable to carry out your spouse’s final wishes. I could easily go on, and on.
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