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Parents make heartwarming tribute to 6-year-old transgender son

  • Helen Willoughby

    What a fantastic family and a lovely happy boy. Brought tears to my eyes, but good tears.Thank-you for sharing your wonderful story xxxx

    • Benjie Watson

      Me too Helen. He’s so cute isn’t he :) Wish my parents had listened and paid attention to my dress preferences and opinions on my own gender when I was that age.

  • Jesse Vincent

    He would have kicked my butt during my years as a male child model and honestly I would have been happy to lose. Outwardly he appears to be a healthy well-groomed and handsome little boy. There’s going to be some tough years ahead of him though and it’s going to be hard to overcome the challenges puberty provides but with a loving, supportive family like that I have no doubts he’ll not only survive but come out a strong STRONG person.

  • Patrick, Leeds

    I hope his life is filled with immense joy and that he can be truly proud of his parents. Good luck to the whole family. X

  • ballboygirl

    Since he could talk he referred to himself as a boy. What a lot of crap. He’s 6 – she – he doesn’t know anything about ‘gender’ – What a sick society we live in; political correctness gone mad; of course his parents refereed to ‘him’ – we aren’t born with gender identities and most of us learn to refer to ourselves as “i” and “me’ not he or she. Children should be brought up to accept their beautiful bodies and not told that it makes any difference whether you have a penis or a vagina. Good grief! ..

    • SilverFireFox77

      Hang on, 6 year olds know quite a lot about gender. Hell, gender stereotypes are imposed practically from the day of birth. Children also typically know a lot more about themselves than adults think, so a child knowing their own gender really young would be normal. We are born with gender identities, as clearly shown by the fact there are trans* people. Furthermore, children grasp pronouns quickly so would correct their parents if the pronoun didn’t fit them. Finally, your biological sex ‘doesn’t make any difference’? Really now? Your biological sex determines virtually every physical aspect of your life from how tall you grow to whether you grow breasts or facial hair during puberty. One way a trans* person described (basically) being trans* was: ‘Imagine you had a broken, twisted leg that made you feel ill but when you walked into the world, everyone saw this as normal, only you saw your leg as wrong. That’s how I feel about my biological sex.’ So, biological sex ‘doesn’t make a difference’? Maybe consider the above comparison sometime.

      • ballboygirl

        Kids don’t start to speak age 6! And kids do NOT grasp pronouns quickly – if anything they grasp ego – I – quickly. This is all kind of ironic when people are attacking the practice of female genital mutilation – everyone on here sounds well for it – sorry, not its no difference because you think in this case its politically acceptable.

        • Andy Millan

          You really do talk a lot of rubbish, to equate this story with FGM is simply ridiculous. No one is advocating that being female is shameful or undesirable, but forcing a child into dressing and acting in a certain way just because society says that is how girls should dress and act is just wrong and may do more psychological harm in the long term.

          • Silly Old Bastard

            Tell me you don’t work with children. Please tell me that.

          • Andy Millan

            I will tell you nothing you odious little troll. What i will say is that i have experience of the psychological harm that can be done to someone by forcing gender noms onto a child who is gender non-conformitive. You on the other hand have no clue on the subject and the tenor of your post on this thread show that. There is an old saying that you should perhaps take to heart “It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.”

    • Oz D

      ok since he knows “nothing” about gender how about you explain to everyone what cis is? tell them what agender means, what non gender is, what gender neutral means, what two-spirit means. go on, tell everyone. I bet you anything that this wee boy will understand it far better than you will.

    • Dermot Mac Flannchaidh

      From the sounds of it you’d rather delete the “T” from “LGBT” altogether. Gay people and transgender people are all in the same boat, and we must be sensitive to one another’s realities.

  • http://www.pariss.info Pariss

    Hmm I have huge reservations about this and similar stories. No child of six or younger has any concept of sex or sexuality.
    Despite their assertations it HAS to be the parents guiding his thinking about gender confusion. If he was born a boy and called a boy then that is what he will accept he is until he has the intelligence and maturity to question that label.
    Having known quite a few transexuals in my time I know form experience that a major percentage use gender confusion to mask other problems int heir lives. Mistakenly they think that by changing sex that will cure their ills. Invariably it doesn’t
    I know and accept that there are genuine people who KNOW they were born int he wrong body but at SIX YEARS OLD they are not in a position to come to that decision unaided

    • upandatems

      Trangenderism has nothing to do with sex or sexuality. You wrote a lot considering you’ve no idea what you’re talking about.

    • qnetter

      A child of six knows a lot about his own gender. The whole notion of “gender confusion” is what we force on people by rejecting their self-awareness. You’re the one with gender confusion.

    • Gareth

      He’s not doing anything that’s irreversible. It’s just a hair cut and a pronoun change from what I could tell.

      • Oz D

        what they will do is put him on hormone blockers when he gets old enough. this will stop the female puberty. next they will put him on T (testosterone) which will him develop male features. he is very lucky to have a family that has listened to him. he will never have to go through the pain of developing in to a girl. I’m so happy for him!

        • ballboygirl

          Sorry Oz D you clearly misogynistic git ! Becoming a girl is not painful – its nature. There is something seriously wrong with you.

          • Sam

            I think the point was that for ‘him’ the prospect of developing into a girl would be terrifying, as he identifies as a boy – not that it is a painful and traumatic experience for every girl. Personally as a bloke I’d be absolutely terrified to have entered puberty and suddenly grown breasts (exaggerating slightly, I am aware that they don’t just appear out of nowhere overnight), just as I’m sure most girls wouldn’t be too thrilled to wake up with a full beard.

          • Oz D

            that’s what I meant, yes.

          • Toni Massari

            Absolutely! And imagine have some boy suddenly pop up from nowhere and try to grab them! imagine the disgust, shame and self-loathing he would go through, thinking he had somehow “asked for it” by just growing them.
            Me I love being a woman, and a lesbian, and I want all children to love who they are, and if we can help them by a haircut and the right clothes, why woudln’t we? I bet you BallBoyGirl is not a mother though, so why would she know or care?

          • Oz D

            I refer to it as “pain” because I remember going through puberty as a girl (I’m a trans guy by the way). I didn’t mean it in a bad way. I meant it as in he won’t have to go through that mental stress and the feeling of something very wrong with himself. if it came off the wrong way then I apologise. for a transgender individual, go thr ough puberty is one of the hardest time of their life. you start developing things that you know is wrong and it is very hard to go through. dysphoria is a very horrible thing.
            there is nothing wrong with being a women at all. just for people who see them self as male, going through biologically as female is not a very pleasant thing. it’s the same for a trans woman.
            we also have to live in fear of people attacking us every day when we come out. this little boy will never have to go through that.
            the comment wasn’t about women. it was about the experience a trans person goes through.

          • Toni Massari

            I am sure no-one took your comment as offensive, Oz, in fact I thought your post was very compassionate, picking up on the emotional distress Ryland has been spared. But the reality os that some “feminists” feel very threatened by Transgender, because they like being victims, anybody’s victims. Now BallBoyGirl can go crying off to Miss that she wasn’t allowed to bully Trans people on Pink News.. well Boo Hoo BallBoyGirl and Silly Old Man, we have evolved, we have Trans friends and we stand by them, OK? You don’t like it? Go back to the Denisovan caves you came from!

          • Benjie Watson

            Being trans male too, I totally see where you’re coming from here. I see transition after puberty as a form of de-transition from the impact of puberty which let’s face it changes too much in the body of someone like us or this little guy, to feel happy about. Before puberty I found that I could largely ‘get by’ as a guy, because I was much less aware of my body in many ways, but during and after it became a daily struggle for me and I could not escape my body very easily. Thankfully I’m now sorting this out, it’s the best decision I’ve ever made, but considering this guy’s experience, and what lies ahead of him; I hope that if he’s still identifying as male, they can help him before puberty kicks in, I really do.

          • Toni Massari

            There you go again, talking without any understanding or knowledge.. let me give you some advice, which clearly you sorely need: R E A D! G E T A N E D U C A T I O N!

        • Gareth

          Oz, I know that may happen in the end. I’m not opposed to what the parents are doing in any way. I was just trying to balance some of the criticism above by saying these current adjustments are minor in the grand scheme of this little dudes life. I think he is incredibly lucky to be on his journey with such a supportive family.

          • Oz D

            oh, no I wasn’t trying to criticise you at all or anything. what you are say is correct. I was just adding on what will eventually happen. that he isn’t given the testosterone straight away.

          • Toni Massari

            Absolutely. Knowing that he can change back if things should so pan out is half the battle. Children sometimes need to explore, but it sounds to me as though Ryland is very clear – as my own children were – about who he is and he will always know he has his mum and dad – and most likely his little sister – in his corner… that is half the battle. United we stand! ADn hurrah to all the people here who stand with Trans people! Respect to us all!

        • Silly Old Bastard

          You are a ghoul

          • Toni Massari

            And you are an intestinal worm!

          • Oz D

            and you’re ignorant.

        • Toni Massari

          And what’s more he will not go through the pain of being hounded by boys lusting after the very sexual characteristics that make him reject his body. I cannot imagine what it must be like, but I have mothered two children and I know how clearly they knew their own gender identity, though I brought them up exactly the same. Ryland is indeed lucky and his parents deserve our praise and support, as do all Transgender people, of whatever age.

        • Benjie Watson

          Not that it’s generally painful developing into a girl, providing you identify as one. If not, then growing breasts and looking less like the guy you see yourself as inside, is one hell of a weird experience and can completely destroy a person’s self-image and confidence. That’s why we transition. It’s positive and I’m so proud of this guy’s parents for being mature enough to recognise the potential negatives of not accepting his wishes at this stage.

    • RedDevil9

      So would you have them force him to wear dresses and be called she when he’d clearly be miserable with that and it would destroy him psychologically? Would you prefer him to be forced to go through female puberty and feel suicidal as his body develops in a way he doesn’t want it to, afraid to go out in public and despising his body even more because he’ll develop breasts and will need to have invasive surgeries like a full mastectomy later on? Gender and sexuality aren’t the same thing either, transgender kids know their gender ID from a very young age, it’s there from the very beginning, they know who they are. Kids also know from a young age who they’re attracted to long before they know what a sexual act is. Why do you think young girls go mad for boy bands? Trans people are also no more likely to ID as gay growing up than anyone else, many trans people ID as gay or bisexual afterwards. If gender and sexuality were the same thing then there’d be no gay or trans people would there.

      As someone has already said, you don’t have the faintest idea what you’re talking about, so it’s probably best not to.

      • ballboygirl

        I love the idea that being forced to wear a dress is anyway traumatic. Hilarious psychology there RedDevil9! Cos of course wearing a dress is SO likely to destroy a girl psychologically! Really, what rubbish you talk.

        • Toni Massari

          Are you talking to the BallBoyGirl in the mirror? because you really haven’t the slightest idea have you? Have you ever READ anything about the subject? Do you KNOW how many transgender people commit suicide very young, because they face al ife condemend to being who they do not want to be? Who they were not MEANT to be? You want to step in and prevent them because of your Australopithecus parentage.. well, Ryland is Homo Sapiens and so are we, who stand with him and his parents. We stand with science, not creationism, and so we INFORM ourselves. I stand with my Transgender friends, as a lesbian and some of them ARE Transgender M-t-F Lesbians. There, go ballistic now, primitive!

          • truth be told

            maybe you should focus on all of the problems socially you will have as a lesbian at such a young age, or even be transgender, more problems are causes through complication. im sure a girl is happy as a boy until she has to actually physically associate with that gender, aka puberty, and then problems arise, bigger than being unhappy in a pink dress.

        • Benjie Watson

          erm, he identifies as a boy, not a girl so yes of course wearing a dress is going to effect him emotionally and psychologically. Believe me I’ve been there, I know how it feels and I’m with this young man and his family 100%.

          • Silly Old Bastard

            You mean 6 year old girl of course

          • Benjie Watson

            Look, I’m sorry mate but can you please just sod off, because your level of ignorance is just too insulting. There’s no ‘girl’ about it, having a vagina does not make this child a girl; if he identifies and wants to be seen as a boy, we must respect his wishes. I’m sick of reading and hearing people saying that a penis or a vagina defines a person’s gender. They’re just organs, that’s all. A person is so much more than this, never forget it. Move on and focus on more constructive things, because frankly debating a person’s gender is surely degrading and insulting. You need to grow up, you are absolutely not welcome in this discussion and I strongly advise you to leave and work through the root causes of your prejudices, doing us all a favour in the process.

          • Benjie Watson

            Actually, I’d go further and suggest that perhaps SOB is secretly worried that it’s possible for any female bodied person to be more of a man than he is.

          • Silly Old Bastard

            Usual reaction. If I don’t agree with some outlandish idea, in this case there being no such thing as gender, then I’m ignorant and prejudiced. The real world doesn’t agree with you. If you ever find yourself in it, they’ll laugh you out
            of the room. So before you offer advice to some six year old girl, sort out your own issues first, if you can ever do that. Frankly, they’re embarrassing you.

          • Benjie Watson

            I’m not sure why I’m bothering to argue with you because frankly your thinking is deeply rooted in a past time that most of us would rather forget existed. I would not be so rude and disrespectful to this child as to insist that they are a girl and refuse to use the pronouns they feel most comfortable having attributed to them. It may very well be a phase, in which case they may feel they can happily move forward in their birth gender, and at this stage as many have said previously, it’s a hair cut and pronoun changes, so no harm done. But if it’s not a phase, if it’s genuinely the case that fundamental to this child’s identity and sense of self is that they are male, not female and wish to transition so that others recognise this about them it’s up to them. 6 years old or not, HE identifies as a BOY, so leave HIM alone, you are a bully!

          • Benjie Watson

            Plus you are effectively bullying a child here, through your judgements so you have lost my respect.

          • Silly Old Bastard

            I’m no bully, but your thoughts are invalid. You are a trans person yourself. You are fundamentally biased against the female form. In professional life, that is known as a conflict of interest. You would be excluded from any involvement other than advice to the panel as and when needed

          • Benjie Watson

            Excuse me but you are now offending me personally. I am absolutely not against the female form either, neither am I particularly in favour of the male form and actually, mate, we’re not going to be discussing my body and decisions I’ve personally made regarding my gender presentation here and I’d appreciate it if you stop getting personal and end this discussion. I’m walking away from this discussion now, I advise you do the same. And I’m actually going to stick to my word on this one.

          • Silly Old Bastard

            Have we here a case of Benjie reliving his experience as a six year old girl ? Can you now understand why your input is tainted ?

    • Maggie

      I’m sorry but I don’t agree with you at all. There is no earthly reason that parents would make such a thing up and put themselves and their child through all the hardship that is ahead of them all. My youngest son at age three decided he was a girl and rejected anything that identified him as a male. This lasted for a year and I had neither encouraged or discouraged him. After taking him to counsellors and psychologists, he eventually told me that he thought that if he was a boy he would grow up to be a man and leave me like his father, grandfather and uncle had all done within a year.
      In another case, a friend of mine who is now about 60 years old, was born a boy. His family were dairy farmers and very conservative. From the time he could talk he insisted he was a girl and eventually his parents allowed him to dress as a girl while at home. In those days absolutely nothing was known of transgenders and he remained a ‘boy’ at school. He is now a woman and has been all his adult life. Del didn’t choose her gender, or her genitalia, but she knew she was a girl from a very young age.

    • John

      Sorry, Pariss, but I have to agree with the rest of these comments. I highly doubt that these parents decided that they’d rather have a boy and chose to go about it in this fashion. “Let’s convince our little girl that she’s a boy!” I don’t think so.

    • N

      I run a brownie group, with 7-10 year old girls. 7 year olds are definitely old enough to know whether they’re a boy or a girl, and how they feel about the other gender.

    • Silly Old Bastard

      I agree. This is so very wrong. Whatever she / he is needs to be determined
      after puberty. From some of the comments here, you’d think possibly having the wrong genitals can be sorted by having a talk with the child…

      • Toni Massari

        What an apt you have chosen! Why don’t you READ about the subject, educate yourself and THEN come back and express an opinion?

        • Silly Old Bastard

          Silly Old Bastard Buttercup Rocks • an hour ago

          I have a feeling that some of those who post ‘positive’ comments about this story are soothing their own insecurities on the back of a six year old child who at any moment is going to ask, “if I am a boy, then where’s my winkle”. Do you want to be there when it happens?

      • Oz D

        HELL NO!!!!! that is the worse thing to EVER do to a transgender child!! I AM transgender and I KNOW the hell he would go through if he doesn’t get help now. it is a nightmare I wouldn’t even wish on YOU. I wish someone had done this for me as a child! he is the luckiest boy in the whole world.

        • Silly Old Bastard

          Hands off. She’s not one of yours yet. She has hope.

          • Oz D

            he is not a she. and this isn’t about converting someone to any side. it’s about what is best for the individual. and what is best right now for him is to let him be who he is. trans people are humans too you know. he’s just like everyone else. as a cis person you don’t know what he is going through at all. it’s not something you can ignore and pretend isn’t happening. because this is a about life and someone’s happiness. if he got made to keep being a girl what will end up happening is him mutilating himself or killing himself. his family don’t want him to go through that so they are doing the right thing.
            if you you can’t open your eyes to the reality of this situation then you should just leave and stay away.

          • Silly Old Bastard

            Step back a bit and take another look. You’ll find a six year old girl walking in her father’s boots. At the moment that is all it is. She’ll probably grow out of it, but there is a 1 in 30000 chance she is a he. You’ll have to wait longer, much longer.

            There’s something of the ‘mad scientist’ about you . I’ve seen the black and white films.

          • Baph

            No desire to challenge your preconceptions about anything that occurs beyond your own personal, limited experience. You seem proud to embrace your ignorance, like it’s all you have. Sad relic.

            He will “probably grow out of it” said the SOB who pulled a statistic out of his arse. Hilarious.

          • Oz D

            you just can’t deal with someone being happy. what sad old person you are. how does it feel know no matter what you say, this little boy, and hundreds just like him, will one day have a sex change, and there is nothing you can do.
            at lest I have an education and I don’t judge people for what they do to their bodies, because it’s their own.

            you are just scared.

          • Silly Old Bastard

            The problem with ‘happy’ is that it is subjective. Means different things to different people. The child will have counselling, we can thank the parents for that, but as for happy, I don’t think at the moment she would know what that is.

          • Oz D

            he knows what makes him happy. how did you think his parent knew it would be best for him? his doctors and therapists. not just any therapist, a GENDER therapist. we all go through them. they are more than qualified to assesses him. this video clearly proves what makes him happy, being a boy. so why don’t you just back off because we the Trans* community don’t want you here or anywhere near this little boy.

    • emmie x

      when we are born we are pushed into the world of pink or blue, masculine and feminine names, this kid fought it because he knew he was not a girl.. my dear its called nature, i am a mother of 3 beautiful children and i am gay.. i lived a straight life until i was 24, i couldnt cope i tried to take my life… this kid has changed his life because he knew who and what he was.. if everyone that is like this kid stood up for who and what they were our friends and family that suffered this would still be with us today… i am so happy these parents seen the young man behind the lady bits and allowed him to grow and be nurtured along the way

      • karen turner

        Very true emmie, I am so glad you have become who you are and want to be now too :) I am a mum of 4 and 1 of my children is a boy but from the moment he could walk and talk I have often said to his dad ( not when he is around ) I think he could be Gay, he loves feminine stuff but my heart beaks because he knows that only girls are supposed to wear bangles, make up, sparkly shoes ( he doesnt think this because I told him, he thinks this because of small minded people and society ) I often tell all my children, they are to be who they are and what ever they choose, I love them. Hats off to all who are brave to say what they want, no matter what age :) xx

      • Toni Massari

        So glad you came through, and I hope you have people in your corner now! x

    • Stefan

      Seriously, you had no concept of sex at the age of six?

      I had elaborate sex fantasies about my gf when I was seven. Not saying I planned it, but I could fantasize about it.

      I don’t remember when I learned about sex, probably at 2-3 ish.

    • Oz D

      as a trans man let me just tell you that everything you just said is a heap of rubbish. I know MANY transgender people who knew they were not born in the right body at the age of 6-5 years old. our gender has NOTHING to do with sexuality. people keep mixing this up. our gender is to do with our ender.
      just because you have known a few transgender people does not mean you know what goes on in our head. how hard it is to feel the way we feel. this little boy will never, thankfully, know how it feels to live years as if you are broken and something is wrong with you. to feel like you are a freak.
      and it is because of people like you that makes it very hard for us to come out and feel ok about being who we really are. you are one of those “it’s just a phase” people. it is NOT ok to do that to a trans individual.
      at six years old a child can except the change far better than a grown up. children don’t care what gender you are, as long as you are still you, they don’t care.

    • ballboygirl

      Pariss -I totally agree – This site is full of wossy politically correct gay people who haven’t got a flippin’ clue but are obsessed with body consciousness – like a baby is born knowing it is male or female – like gender=sex – someone actually said, would you have HIM (a girl) go through female puberty and grown breasts. Well hec yeah! Having a female body is natural – get over yourselves!

  • Pet

    OMG! He IS a BOY! and way more masculine than the average boy at this age. I’m happy for him and his family. Anyway, they do seem to be very happy together, so…

  • p

    I used to be like this as a child, I even have a pic of myself in a tux at wedding. I have pictures of me dressed up as he-man and Lion-o out of the Thundercats. I had short blonde hair, played with boys toys and I even use to call myself as Robert between the ages 6-10. Obviously I used to answer to my normal name in register. I think the parents should be careful here especially when puberty kicks in. Put it this way, I was attracted girls but I knew and discovered I did not want a penis. Don’t put pressure on this kid until they 100% know. I would say when I was a child I thought of myself as boy but as grown up am a woman. Yes I still wear men’s clothing and like a lot of male things but my gender is female. Let this child be who they want to be, let it be there choice not one that is forced on them. I was so lucky to have understanding parents. My mother would of probably preferred it if I was transgendered rather than gay.

  • Aurore CR

    Those kind of parents are extremely rare, it’s sad, but they bring some hope!!

  • Tangia Benoit

    Cudos to you Ryland. You are a true inspiration and a very lucky boy to have such a wonderful, caring, compassionate family like you do. Always be you and follow your heart handsome.

  • http://barefootmillionairesecrets.com/ Dr. F. Gianmichael Salvato

    Ryan and his parents ROCK. This was very emotional and beautiful to watch.

    • Silly Old Bastard

      Not tragic then?

      • Buttercup Rocks

        Who for?

        • Silly Old Bastard

          I have a feeling that some of those who post ‘positive’ comments about this story are soothing their own insecurities on the back of a six year old child who at any moment is going to ask, “if I am a boy, then where’s my winkle”. Do you want to be there when it happens?

          • Wesley Turner

            SOB your name is perfect for you! Dont ever change it!

          • Buttercup Rocks

            I can imagine, in the parents’ position, I might mourn the passing of the daughter I thought I had but, if the only tragedy you’re imagining is how Ryland’s going to deal with not having a penis, that can be sorted out if he so wishes when he’s older. Not all transpeople choose to have reassignment/conformation surgery and he may be content with what he’s got.

            You don’t have to understand it. Just accept it. It’s not about you, (or me). I’m straight, cissexual, in my 50s, and can’t possibly imagine what it’s like to be born knowing I didn’t conform to the gender binary I’ve accepted as a given Norm all my life. However, unlike you, I’m learning because I know a young person who’s going through this right now. Fortunately, like Ryland they too have a hugely supportive family and I’m damned glad they do because it’s not an easy road to hoe.

            If you want to talk tragedy, how about depression, self-harm, bullying and feelings of self loathing, confusion and isolation leading in significant numbers to suicide?

          • Oz D

            Ms Buttercup, you truly do rock!!

          • Buttercup Rocks

            I do my best, Oz. I unthinkingly upset a transperson this week with a flip comment and it made me feel awful. The least I could do was pipe up here.

          • Oz D

            well I’m sure they know that you really didn’t mean to upset them and they would be very proud of you for speaking up for this little boy today. I know I am :)

          • Buttercup Rocks

            You’re very kind :-)

          • Toni Massari

            Yayyyy! I go with that too! Hugs!

          • Benjie Watson

            I totally agree. Thank you Ms Buttercup for your support and willingness to do what’s necessary to understand your young friend’s situation. I would add that I also agree with the sentiment of your ending comment. The biggest concern I have and have had for a while now is that so many of my friends are constantly stressed out, from their demanding jobs in the week and then extra weekend pressures with parenting and other responsibilities. Stress is a serious problem in our modern society today.

          • Silly Old Bastard

            No. it’s all cut and dried, and that’s wrong. Have the parents lost a daughter, or do they have a tomboy on their hands who may turn out to be a normal lesbian. Far too early to tell, though I am impressed by the parents support, not so with their premature diagnosis.

          • ballboygirl

            Silly Old Bastard – Thanks for talking sense. Most people on here clearly have a problem with female bodies – clearly think it’s someone perverse or wrong to have a vagina and even think its’ painful to wear a dress. SO glad I don’t hang out with these type of freaks.

          • Gareth

            What “type of freaks” do you prefer?

          • Toni Massari

            The ones that do not peddle hate!

          • Oz D

            really? wow that was bad. you clearly didn’t get what I said.

          • Oz D

            so that why you didn’t understand what I said earlier. i bet you go about calling yourself a feminist but you don’t include trans women. you my dear are what they call transphobic. I’m glad I don’t know someone like you in my life.
            oh, and I am not the freak here.

          • Toni Massari

            HEAR! HEAR! Oz! Most of us are with you, while Silly old Bastard and BallBoyGirl stand in the Australopithecene ranks, screaming “Your genitals are what defines you!” LOL! What a spectacle, hey? Good on you for speaking out!

          • Oz D

            what can I say, I was an LGBT rep at my college and I had to fight for us now and again :) if you don’t call someone out then people are just going to dance about it. at the end of the day they are both transphobic and have absolutely no say in what we choice to do with our bodies to make us happy.

          • Toni Massari

            Most people here have a problem with Transphobia! And you bear a handle that marks you for the same confused, gender-fixed poor excuse for an LGBT person. Ryland is some several steps ahead of any other transgender person, blessed with parents that have done for him what clearly yours should have done for you ball-boy-girl! GIVEN YOU A CHANCE TO BE YOURSELF! But they didn’t and now you spit at those who have what you did not. Jealous? Well you might be. Ryland is already several times the person you could ever be!

          • Buttercup Rocks

            Yes, he may turn out to be a normal run-of-the-mill lesbian. In which case, no harm, no foul. He’s 6. He’s not changed his name. He’s not had radical invasive surgery or hormone treatment. He’s had a haircut and a change of pronoun! If it all turns out to be a terrible embarrassing mistake, (which I highly doubt), they can take it from there.

            This isn’t your kid. These people aren’t related to you. I really don’t know why you even care.

          • Silly Old Bastard

            It’s ‘she’. The child’s a girl. It will say so on her birth certificate.

          • Buttercup Rocks

            I reiterate. Not your child. Doesn’t touch your life in any way whatsoever. Why. Do. You. Care?

          • Silly Old Bastard

            Probably the same reason you do, whose child it is not also. An infant at risk, it’s a human thing.

          • Buttercup Rocks

            As I mentioned earlier, I know someone who is affected by this issue and have taken the time to educate myself. You patently haven’t and neither will you be told by those who have walked in Ryland’s shoes. The young person I know was absolutely blindsided by puberty; was (and still is) being bullied; was plunged into deep depression and started self-harming. And it’s attitudes like yours – attitudes born of fear and ignorance – that make the world so damned hard for trans people.

            And as for the “human thing?” By using terms like “one of yours” you are othering people, rendering them less than human. And that, mate, is despicable.

          • Silly Old Bastard

            I bow to your higher calling then. I shall sit crossed legged as you decide the future of more children. ‘Othering’. Now that’s a new B/S term to me. Another PC sin to add to my list.

          • Buttercup Rocks

            How’s about you respond to what I’m actually saying instead of putting words into my mouth?

            As for othering – it’s a scholarly term with its roots in Social Science and it’s been around for decades. Instead of trolling the websites of people whose views you don’t espouse and experience you don’t share, try googling it.

            As of now I am done with you.

          • Silly Old Bastard

            You have some nerve saying that!
            This really is GOODBYE

          • Toni Massari

            PROMISE? FOREVER?

          • Toni Massari

            The silly old coot is a Transphobe… THAT is the sole substance of his “argument”, he has neither the education nor the intelligence to argue, he is an out and out TROLL!

          • Toni Massari

            As you clearly Transphobic we think we all agree that yours is the opinion of something that belongs under our shoes! PS B/S.. an AmeriKKKan term if I ever came across one so methinks we are dealing with a Yankee Troll from the NOM or somesuch Kreesteeyan Fun-demented-lists! :D

          • Silly Old Bastard

            Forgot to mention, all this is highly embarrassing. Here’s Western civilisation trying to convince the Muslims that not educating girls is wrong, and then YOU come along.

          • Buttercup Rocks

            The only person that assertion is embarrassing is you, tosh.

          • Toni Massari

            Ahahaha! You have gone and revealed your true nature, you misogynist maggot! how quaint! You MUST be old, in fact very old, because that argument was left behind in the last Millennium. … just like YOU!

          • Toni Massari

            Absolutely, and ther is the new suggested handle for this Troll: Desipcable Old Man! :D

          • Toni Massari

            There you go again, “thing” and you purport to care, but your only intent is to get some attention, you poor, neglected, abused wretch. We are not your parents or carers… take your grievances up with them!

          • Remy Nichols

            “An infant at risk”

            This child would more at risk if his parents were unaccepting. He would be forced to live as a female, something he obviously does not want to be, he would have to deal with his parents being ashamed of him, if they were radical they might even kill him. The suicide rates for trans people are MUCH higher than those of cis people.

            You are an ignorant, ridiculous little man. I’m hope your username is right, and that you are in fact old, because then you will die sooner.

          • Andy Millan

            You really are an odious little man.

          • Silly Old Bastard

            You need to expand.

          • Buttercup Rocks

            Oooh! Oooh! I will!

            Ignorant. Narrow minded. Reactionary. Tongue-pulling. Inflammatory. Othering. Troll.

          • Silly Old Bastard

            Goodbye

          • Toni Massari

            Nay.. FAREWELL! Writing to Pink News to ban you!

          • Toni Massari

            ‘Othering’ EXCELLENT term! I am nicking it, if you don’t mind! It defines exactly what these two Trolls are… Thanks!

          • Toni Massari

            1) You lack basic logic. 2) Your comments are simply intended to inflame but have neither substance nor reference 3) you haven’t the slightest idea of what your are talking about 4) you are an odious TROLL!

          • Steven Gregory

            We only assume SOB is a “man.”

          • Toni Massari

            “IT”? You are not a parent are you? No parent would ever call a child an “IT”, HE is a transgender child. YOU are a substandard, sorry excuse for a human being.

          • Toni Massari

            And, what’s more, he has the certain knowledge that his parents will be behind him no matter what changes he goes through. Something our Silly Old Bastard’s deprived childhod seriously lacked, else why would he be so insecure as to try to attack this couple for doing their best to stand by their child? I very much doubt our SOB has any children. me, I raised two and lost one to diabetes, I know what it’s like to fear for a child’s life and these parents have gone to the trouble of informing themselves and saw what could lay ahead for him and are determined that he won’t be a victim of transphobia at 6! Good peeps! :D

          • Tippysnail

            I thank the heavens above that the inhuman ass who parades as Silly Old Bastard has not bred!!!
            Without question the Troll has one of the most handles I’ve ever seen.
            Great to see the stand you took for Ryland and every other person in that or other similar situation and the same to you all. So pleased to see such decent people :)

          • Buttercup Rocks

            I’m sorry for your loss.

            And they are indeed good folks. My young friend’s parents intend to do the same, though theirs is a less cut and dried situation at present.

          • Benjie Watson

            I am always very supportive of my transgender friends, understanding the experience on a personal level myself helps. But I offer words of caution sometimes, because I know that in F2M for example, taking testosterone does cause the voice to change and if you’re not absolutely certain that’s what you want it can be a major disadvantage for a de-transitioned woman to live with. Although the health service in the UK especially takes it time sometimes, the caution is at least a little comforting in this regard because it filters the people who aren’t totally sure from the certain. It’s a huge thing to transition, but then the processes in place aren’t perfect and there are plenty of bugs which need to be sorted out still.

          • dandan

            You my friend are a total disgrace! Maybe your dad should have put you in a tissue and down the toilet! If the boy wants a WINKLE as you put it when he grows up he will decide…. He chose to be a boy, remember, so he knows he has the anatomy of a girl! SO WHAT! and as for the lesbian remark, how narrow minded can you get.

          • Remy Nichols

            No, he didn’t “choose” to be a boy. It’s just the way he is. It’s not a choice.

          • Benjie Watson

            Absolutely, Dandan. Some people seem to obsess over winkles way too much any way. It’s also a very very common attack from people when you’re f2m, because people often thinks the penis makes the man. It’s all bollocks, if you excuse the pun hehe. You may have heard of David Reimer, an example of a boy who lost his penis early in his life (due to a medical complication). He was subsequently and wrongly, brought up as a girl but he rejected this gender and later reverted to male. The female gender was forced upon him at the time, they even tried to force him to have a female body, but again he wouldn’t accept this. He identified as a boy and that was a very powerful feeling for him. Likewise I’m prepared to believe that this little boy is what he feels he is and we should be prepared to listen to him, not force him to live a life in a gender which is alien to him. Also sexuality and gender: two completely disconnected things. Why do so many people assume trans guys are lesbians?

          • Toni Massari

            Do you even re-read through your droolings, you silly old man?

          • Remy Nichols

            I thought I was a tomboy, and I thought i was a lesbian, but in the end I was in fact trans/nb. Shut your uninformed mouth.

            “premature diagnosis”? Bullshit. It’s not a diagnosis, being trans/nb isn’t a medical condition, and it’s PERFECTLY okay for people to have phases. There’s nothing wrong with phases.

          • The Down-to-earth Thinker

            Their little boy knows he used to be a girl and his parents helped him become the boy he was… it is still rylands decision, just needed parental consent. Everything you are arguing here is negated by the fact their child isn’t in the dark about it.

          • Silly Old Bastard

            I’m not sure I could even tie shoe laces at 6. Alright, if you can’t deal with 6 being far too immature, think of her being around 72 months old. We’ll get you there in the end, but it is hard work.

          • Remy Nichols

            Just a note or two from a trans/nb individual with the intent to better inform you!

            Please write ‘trans people’ with a space, just as you would ‘trans woman’ and ‘trans man’. They’re not one word.

            You’re not cissexual, you’re cis/gender/ :) Sex and gender should not ever be equated, ever. Please do try your best to change your current words to these!

          • Buttercup Rocks

            Sorry about that. Of course I will. (Though in fact I am cissexual as well as cisgender!) Learning curves, and thanks
            :-)

          • Toni Massari

            There you go again, projecting your own inferiority and insufficiency on the rest of us. poor, pathetic dunce. Stop trying to impress… you don’t!

          • Steven Gregory

            You’re truly a cynical blackhearted ass hole.

          • Benjie Watson

            Again having a penis does not make you a man. He may be fine with what he has, and if not I hope that surgery has advanced with leaps and bounds by the time he gets old enough to have it, if he chooses that option. Having a penis only feels essential for some people, the same for trans women but the other way around obviously. In reality what really matters is how people receive you and how you feel about living in your body. I’m proud of these parents and this little guy. People forget how much male and female external genitalia has in common anyway.

          • Silly Old Bastard

            Would it disturb you to know that I think anyone who suggests taking a knife to a six year old tomboy is mentally unhinged?

          • Benjie Watson

            I thought you were leaving this discussion SOB :(

          • Silly Old Bastard

            I was, then I realised I was surrounded by escapees from a lunatic asylum.

          • Oz D

            an example of being uneducated. they don’t preform surgery like that at his age. no doctor has ever done that. not all trans people get bottom surgery. he won’t even be put on hormones until he gets a bit older.

          • Silly Old Bastard

            Let’s err on the side of what is then. She is still a girl, albeit with problems.

          • Oz D

            he is a boy. and the fact that you only use “she is still a girl” as your argument against what I am saying just shows how little you know to back what you are saying. I am far more educated about on this topic than you. I have made it my busyness to know as much as I can and I am using facts. facts that you can not fight against.
            you are just proving every time that you are closed minded, uneducated, and transphobic.

      • Toni Massari

        No, not in the least! How would you have liked having someone convince you that you were other than as you felt yourself to be? If you had been told, for example, that you were sub-human, and so not as good as other people? That you were mentally retarded, and so should not aspire to anything “normal” children could hope to achieve in life?

        • Silly Old Bastard

          You are an idiot

          • Toni Massari

            The last resort of the terminally lacking in cerebral resources is to project their own shortcomings on others. You, sir, are beneath contempt.

  • Bex

    It’s cool that these parents are now accepting of their son for who he is, but it’s kind of sad that it took them so long to finally be cool about it. If your small child shouts “I’m a boy” and you continue to tell them they’re a girl and force them to wear dresses etc. despite knowing it’s making them uncomfortable, that’s pretty horrible. Good on them for being supportive these days, but still, there’s something not quite right about their reaction to this. Especially the part about how their big motivation was because they learnt about suicide statistics for trans people, it feels like they thought, “Oh I guess we better start being supportive so that he doesn’t kill himself when he’s older.” You should support your kid because you should support your kid. It’s not that complicated. You should love you kid for who they are and you should feel very bad if you’re making your kid feel bad. I hope their story inspires other people to be more immediately supportive of their trans children. It shouldn’t take a health professional’s advice to figure out that if your son wants you to treat them like a boy, you should treat them like a boy, otherwise you’re contributing to the unhappiness of your own child.

    • Kerry

      Bex, it’s not that simple. Parents should not support children in everything they do or want to do. That’s what the whole concept of discipline is, and parents need to teach their children how the world works and correct them when ythey are mistaken. Parents correct children like this every day. So when something like this comes along, a parent might not know which side of the line it falls on. This was their first child. They have never done anything like this before. And it was a huge life changing decision. They were cautious and sought expert advice because they love their child and wanted to be sure. Their reaction was more than understandable and far far better than the majority of what we see out there.

      • Bex

        The way you’ve phrased it makes it sound like he said to his parents, “I want to push over other children on the playground”. That’s the sort of thing that can be disciplined and a decision needs to be made about whether or not they support what their child wants to do. Whether or not you should accept someone you love for who they really are shouldn’t be a “huge life changing decision” it should be something that everyone can do quite easily because they’re a good person and good people don’t contribute to the unhappiness of the people they love. The suggestion that a person’s true identity is something that they could potentially be “disciplined” or “corrected” for is a little disturbing to be honest.

        • Kerry

          Bex, I wasn’t trying to imply that they should have disciplined him for that. I was using discipline as an *example* that I can point to of parents making decisions for the good of their child. (I wish I had chosen a different word given the confusion it has caused). Parents make these kind of decisions all the time – sometimes they get it right, sometimes they get it wrong. And this decision certainly is life changing, which ever way you look at it.
          The basic summary of what I was trying to say is “This is wonderful news. Let’s cut the parents some slack that they didn’t know what to do immediately in these uncharted territories for them. Parents always have to make difficult decisions, and this time they just wanted to seek advice first to make sure it was the best thing for their child.”

      • Marc

        Discipline wasn’t part of this case. In case you failed to notice, the parents took the proper steps. Since they were uninformed, they researched and spoke to an an expert. Afterwards, the expert gave them a diagnosis. Are you expecting some sort of discipline to be implemented after the diagnosis? It doesn’t work that way. Disciplining behavior and assessing a situation are entirely 2 different things.

        • Kerry

          Marc, you have misread what I wrote. I am fully in support of the outcome here. I’m also fully in support of the fact that they researched and spoke to an expert. I also never said (and never intended to imply) that they should have disciplined their son in this matter. My point is that parents are continuously having to make judgments about when to support their child’s wishes and when not to, and that it can be hard for them to know what side of the line they should be on when they come across an issue that they don’t have any experience of. I was saying that they did precisely the right thing in this instance and that we shouldn’t be judging them for not doing it sooner.

  • emmie x

    when we are born we are pushed into the world of pink or blue, masculine
    and feminine names, this kid fought it because he knew he was not a
    girl.. my dear its called nature, i am a mother of 3 beautiful children
    and i am gay.. i lived a straight life until i was 24, i couldnt cope i
    tried to take my life… this kid has changed his life because he knew
    who and what he was.. if everyone that is like this kid stood up for who
    and what they were our friends and family that suffered this would
    still be with us today… i am so happy these parents seen the young man
    behind the lady bits and allowed him to grow and be nurtured along the
    way…. and i wish them all the happiness in the world xxx

  • Joi Wash

    So proud of him and prouder for the parents who, not only supported Ryland, but most importantly listened to him. LBGT will surely support Ryland and his family! #LBGT rocks! xxx

  • Toni Massari

    @Pariss, I echo other comments: you conflate “gender identity” and “sexual orientation”. Let me point out that some transgender people idetify as “straight” while some identify as straight, and what THEY mean by it was carefully explained to me years ago, by a lesbian M-t-F transgender friend, when I ignorantly asked “But if you were originally a man and loved women, why did you transition?” She answered “because my eyes and my brain tell me I should be female, while my heart tells me I love women, that I want to lie in the arms of a woman and be loved by her as a woman”. Somehow I don’t think anyone has ever explained it quite so clearly since.

  • Josie Bell

    Wonderful parents! More people should be like this in the world, it would be a much better place. <3 xxx

  • lena

    yes, yes ,yesss!! God bless you Ryland and your wonderful parents xxx

  • Oz D

    I just want to say as a trans man I am so happy for this little boy. it has brought tears to my eyes as I know exactly how he feels. he has the best parents in the world and hope that every day he thanks them for letting him be who he is. you are one lucky kid and I wish you luck on your journey!! xXx

  • http://gentlemind.blogspot.co.uk/ gentlemind

    “They told us we were having a baby girl”. How did the doctors know? Because there was something physically real to know (the presence of a female body).
    God bless this sweet girl in the hardships she will face.

  • Andrea Edwards

    what truly wonderful parents you are and what beautiful children you have. God chose you especially to have Ryland-I know you were hand picked for this as the special people you are.May God always bless you and your family.
    With much love and prayers across the water to you from England xxxxX-A big one for Ryland.

  • Josh

    Coming out is a risky decision. It’s ALWAYS wrong to out someone else. Even worse publicly. Even worse to a child.

  • Karen Rogers-Morejon

    This was very informative as well as heart-warming. I always thought the word “Transgender” only referred to people who have undergone the surgical transition of sex change. What a lucky kid to have a voice at such a young age. And what awesome parents for slowing down to listen to him. This definitely puts a smile on my face. =)

  • sylvia

    This video should be shown in every school. I have a transgender friend, what she went through in her young life was horrendous. What wonderful parents. We are not all the same.

  • Mariah Tess

    I shouldn’t worry because there’s no point for me to, but I do a bit anyway: What happens when Ryland starts to develop/go through puberty? Puberty is bad enough but for him I’m sure it would be even more difficult.
    Kids (and adults) aren’t always so understanding and/or open minded, so I’m sure Ryland will face bullying from ignorant people. Although, maybe since he’s already so strong it might not be as damaging? I hope so.
    There’s probably some law or restriction or something against it, but wouldn’t it be easier to start transitioning him while he’s still young so that when the time comes, he’ll develop more as a male? And when puberty rolls around or gets close to it, start hormone therapy? It’s obvious this isn’t just a kid thing. It’s cut and dried: Ryland is really a boy. He strikes me as a very bright kid as well, so despite his age I still wouldn’t think “Oh, it’s just some idea stuck in [her] head.” It’s obvious that he’s much happier as a boy. He rejected feminine stuff since Day One. It’s rather impossible to get a false idea that you’re the wrong sex when you don’t even know the alphabet yet. You’re too young to think that deeply! It’s unfortunate that other people don’t see that and judge negatively. It doesn’t take much thought to realize that it’s not “just a phase.” Plus, if they started ASAP, wouldn’t it spare him from having to go through painful and expensive surgeries later on?
    A tiny part of why that bothers me is because he can’t run around shirtless when he gets older. Well, he could, but it wouldn’t be a good idea. It would suck to have to wrap himself every day to maintain a flat chest. Plus you can already see he’s starting to develop feminine facial features.
    Those are just my thoughts. I’m in no way an expert in child development and the like, so don’t quote me on anything. Lol
    Not saying he’s not good looking at all now but omg was he a cute baby!

  • Chloe Ozwell

    This is amazing! Ryland’s parents are what all parents should be. Loving and accepting of their children no matter what. Ryland’s story is so inspiring and he will have so much support all over the world. What a wonderful little boy! This is a real family! Much love to them.

  • keepitsimple

    If a baby is born with a penis he’s a boy, if he is born with a vagina it’s a girl. It’s simple. Period. God didn’t make any mistakes. People strum up all that other mess and variations. Simple facts.

    • Buttercup Rocks

      Simple being the operative word.

    • Bluespiral58

      And if a baby is born deaf, well that’s the way it is. None of this cochlear implant nonsense. God never makes mistakes. Keep it simple. Keep it simple. Live a simple life.

  • darzan

    ..it’s things like this that restores your faith in the human race. If the child is happy being a boy what on earth can the reason be for anyone opposing it? In fact, damn all those idiots. I hope their lives become truly miserable…

  • Linsey Marrow

    you both show what good parents should do, your strength and love is amazing, Ryland is one very lucky little boy to be blessed with you both, his journey through life will be littered with small minded people with evil tongues but I have no doubt that the love and support of his family will see him through, sending you all much love xx

  • Tippysnail

    You guys are incredible parents to your daughter and her big brother Ryland. If only every parent, sister, brother, Grandma, Grandpa, Aunt, Uncle, Cousin, Sibling and Friend were to unconditionally love their child as you do and allow them to be who they really are, the world would be a much better place.
    You really have warmed my heart :-)

  • Silly Old Bastard

    Right, that’s me out of ‘T’ room. Yes, anger will get you all
    the understanding you clearly need..

  • Dawn Milne

    Wow!! Fantastic parents and what a handsome boy x A parents love should know no limits. Made me cry in a happy way x

  • Tekla Parajdi

    this brought tears to my eyes! parenting done right!!

  • Chris

    I thought I was Postman Pat. I’m glad I wasn’t allowed to become him at such an early age though…

  • Rachelle Leonard

    I haven’t read such a wonderful story in years. I’m 86 and glad I have lived long enough to have known people like you who have brains and use them to do the right thing! You’r lucky to have a terrific young man and he is lucky to have been born to the right parents!

  • Angie B.

    I could only hope that I could be like this. I truly believe that being gay or transgender is not a choice. Why would so many endure what they have to go through if it was. I have a friend I knew was gay since we were in elementary school. Same type of situation. Raised by christian parents, Active in the church. One of the nicest people you’d ever meet.

  • FunkyBon

    So inspiring – I love you Ryland ! You are a brave and handsome little boy ….with parents like that, you’ll go far in this world. I just hope the world will accept your beautiful soul and the tyranny against the LGBT community will disappear ….

  • Steven Gregory

    This family and their story moves me to tears. Their concern for the happiness and personhood of their children is really something spectacular. That is a brilliant little boy, he reads aloud so well.

    Colorado has a family who has endured court cases to allow their transgender daughter to use the girls lavatory at school and many people ask, “What if she changes her mind?” The mom answered, “I will change with her, her entire life, whatever decisions she makes. Isn’t that what all parents do?”

    Thank you for loving your son more than an idea of who you thought your child would be.

  • Sarah

    You all are a very strong family and have a very handsome son!

  • Oli

    Brilliant story, very moving. I am just concerned what will happen once puberty starts, Will you put Ryland on male hormones. And what when he starts growing breasts and having periods?

  • Stu

    we are talking about a 6 year old child. She is too young to understand what she is talking about. Firstly she is deaf which could explain why she believed she was a boy. Maybe in her head her voice has the same pitch and tone as her father.
    At 6 years old a child learns almost everything from its parents. If her parents just go along with her claims she is a boy. She’s going to think she is.

    I have nothing against a grown man/woman choosing to live out their life as a member of the opposite sex. But it all comes down to environmental aspects that make us feel more like a man/woman. I’m not trying to be offensive in any way, but not a single person has ever been born the wrong gender. Aspects of how they are raised have an effect on them.

    Please understand I mean no offence, but this is just insane. Environmental influences change who we are. Some people find people of the same sex attractive and that is perfectly fine. But ask yourself at what point this becomes to much. In an attempt to be compassionate and understanding where do we draw the line… Would you accept a 5 year old coming out as gay. My friends 5 year old said he was a dog for a few weeks. Should he build him a kennel and feed him kibble?

  • Gina Garcia

    I am still crying… What courage and they are true Parents, loving their child “unconditionally” …. Good luck and God bless!

  • Antôn Howarth

    its amazing to see Ryland. You are a true inspiration and a very lucky boy to have such a wonderful, caring, compassionate family like you do

  • Benjie Watson

    I’m transgender male myself and believe me this little dude is so lucky to have such awesome parents supporting him with this one. Yeah, we get those people who claim it’s just a phase, but when that ‘phase’ feels like a permanent feature of later life, transition is the key to helping people see who you really really are inside. Happy boy, he looks so cute too! Bless him and thank you for this wonderfully inspiring story :)

  • Josh Mailman

    This video gives me faith in humanity and the evolution of our species towards love for all . I love you people !

  • Amanda S.

    It is families like these, and parents like these, that give me hope even when hope is lacking in our community, thank you for this tribute!

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