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Facebook remove ‘Bareback’ sex page after it receives more than 20,000 likes

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  1. Clearly wrong topic but I ask for advise.

    This morning on going to work I went to my car only to be shouted at by a passing cyclist that I was a “Dirty Poof”

    This is in a Welsh village I have lived in for 6 years.

    Any thoughts appreciated.

    1. Katie kool-eyes 13 Feb 2013, 11:11pm

      Ignore it

    2. Same thing happened to me years ago when I came home to visit my mum
      after work one Saturday night.I parked my car at the bottom of our driveway in our street,a quiet Northern Beaches suburban residential street and as I walked towards my driveway a group of 4 young blokes were walking towards me heading to the local pub as we passed each other I said “Have a good night boys”….Once they’d got a reasonable distance away one of them yelled to me..”How’s your ass mate?”..I stopped looked yelled back “what did you say?”..the voice yelled back “You heard me!”..I said..”come here and say that”..I heard laughter they kept walking..I stood there incredulous that something like this could happen to me in the very street I grew up in by kids in their late teens who would have been little ones playing in our street prior to me moving out..It was 2002..a sad encounter that’s stuck in my mind,a sad encounter that didn’t have to happen.

    3. Christopher in Canada 13 Feb 2013, 11:12pm

      Wash your car?

      ;-P

      He was a jerk. Who knows what crap he’s been dealing with before he crossed paths with you. Leave him be. You know str8′s insult anyone by calling them gay – it makes them feel (mistakenly) superior. You have better sex than he EVER will.

      1. Better sex? Why?

    4. This isn’t as off topic as you may think. Reports of ever rising rates of HIV in the gay community will encourage this sort of incident. Do people who bareback give a monkeys about how much they are damaging the LGBT community? I think not, and they clearly don’t care about the homophobia that youngsters in schools and colleges experience, although some may even weep crocodile tears about it when it’s discussed.

  2. I ticked ur comment meaning to tick the Ignore It comment. Sorry this happened to u.

    With regard to fbook. I’m glad they took this page down. What is wrong withSao many of us?

  3. Karen Lamb once said “A year from now you will wish you had started today”, so I ask of you to check out this website I found and have no regrets, like me.

  4. It’s the issue that nobody wants to deal with. There is a fascination with bareback sex in large parts of the gay community and likely why HIV infection rates refuse to fall. Notwithstanding mobile apps like twitter that actively encourage young gay men to have casual sex with strangers. I’ve the app myself and with exception it’s full of men in their 20s and teens looking for casual sex. I think when you combine the fascination and allure of bareback sex with the fact the gay ‘community’ is actively targeted by commercial ventures that essentially profit from frequent and regular promiscuity – the HIV crisis among homosexuals is hardly a surprise. I don’t get why people don’t tackle these issues instead of thinking a slightly amusing and cheeky ad in Gay Times is somehow the answer.

    The fight against HIV should be far more aggressive and much more in tune with the realities of modern life for gay men.

    1. Sorry, mobile apps like GRINDR I mean, not twitter. I was tweeting at the time haha

    2. Is there something “edgy” about contracting a chronic life shortening, life restricting (restricting in every way, including work and future relationships) illness? What am I missing here?

      1. Perhaps you are speaking from personal experience Ray, but I know many many HIV+ individuals who do not find having HIV as restrictive as you suggest. Certainly those who have survived from the 80′s & the early 90′s have found their lives restricted in some ways, but the fact they are still with us does not suggest that HIV is “life shortening”

        Better understanding of HIV, together with high standards of care & modern, well tolerated meds have liberated many older positive individuals; I do not agree that someone with HIV is automatically “restricted in every way”.

        I am always disappointed & saddened that those of us with HIV are often portrayed as being unhealthy, unable to work & unable to enjoy life – it simply is not the case, particularly those of us diagnosed in the last 10 years; we can look forward to long lived & very fulfilling lives. Why is the glass always half empty with HIV, if it were another long term condition it seems to me the glass is always half full. Very odd!

        1. You hit that nail, directly on it’s head, W6_bloke. I’ll stand next to any HIV LONG TERM SURVIVOR any day. HIV has not reshaped me, only educated me in ways that do not restrict me from doing my daily things. I’ve been an HIV+ bloke since the early 80′s. Hello? It’s now 2013 and guess what? I’m still here! With the amount of god awful medications that I’ve pumped into my body since the introduction of AZT years ago, I’ve sustained, gotten over the side effects (some damaging) and moved forward. Yes, gay men will and shall dabble in bareback, but please keep in mind, this is their choice and their choice alone. No one forced them into it. It’s mutual and yes, the risk is always present. There are countless ways to still catch HIV but sadly, the focus is on but 1 method. I am a vibrant and healthy HIV+ gay male. I don’t look sick. I don’t look like I have this nasty bug. I don’t let HIV control my life, for I control HIV.

  5. Christopher 14 Feb 2013, 11:11am

    What is the HIV rate among gay men?

    1. There are thought to be approximately 41,000 HIV infections amongst MSM in the UK according to the surveillance figures produced by the HPA for 2011.

      This figure includes an accurate estimate of 8,100 undiagnosed HIV infections. Some studies suggest that up to 80% of all new infections come from people with undiagnosed HIV.

  6. @ Aaron. You say “The fight against HIV should be far more aggressive and much more in tune with the realities of modern life for gay men.” It should be far more aggressive? How? Do you mean you would like to see adverts back on our TV screens like those from the 1990s were it showed a gravestone with “AIDS” written across it? No, I do not want to see that. That is counter-productive. It scare-mongers and will make HIV/AIDS even more taboo within general society. The simple fact is, if gay men want to bareback, they’re going to bareback. There is nothing that can be done. There is no point in trying to place blame on Porn, gay social networking apps/websites like Grindr/Gaydar or lack of education. P.S Dave North, why are you waffling on about your private life here? Please take it elsewhere, it is completely off topic

    1. I believe scaremongering is the lesser of two evils when compared with complacency. And there is a worrying level of complacency among young gay men in particular. I also think because it’s generally seen as a ‘gay’ issue that mainstream media, government, health authorities – ignore it. You can walk down the street and and in an hour have 11 buses go by with chlamydia awareness promotional posts but you can be out for a month of Sunday’s and not see one single information poster on HIV.

      I think porn itself is irrelevant to the debate other than to say the ferocity at which BB porn is seemingly desired, sought and produced I think is symptomatic of a society and more specifically of a (gay) community that doesn’t see HIV as that big a deal any more. For men in their mid to early 20s the campaigns of the late 80s to early 90s as good as never happened. I think your attitude of ‘if they will they will’ is worrying and naive as the economic and social cost of this thing is vast.

      1. My attitude is not naive. Far from it. You know as well as I do that gay men will have bareback sex regardless. What you seem to desire is some sort of giant nanny who visits communities of gay man who will stand there and wag the finger “no bareback sex, condoms only. The economic and social cost is vast”. No will will listen to you. I certainly wouldn’t if I was a young gay man. And you talk about economic and social cost? Really? Are you living in the same world I am? I am more concerned about over-population, the rich getting richer, the poor getting poorer, etc etc. If you think that gay men who get HIV through having consensual bareback sex are such a social cost to society, what about over-eaters? People who drink? Who smoke?

        1. I think you exemplify precisely why this is a problem in the first place.

      2. I believe scaremongering is the lesser of two evils when compared with complacency

        I agree completely.

      3. The problem with “scaremongering” is that the cat is out of the bag – HIV is no longer a terminal illness, we know lots about it & very few people in the UK die directly as a result of advanced HIV infection anymore. This is in part why we have the problem of continuing levels of new HIV infections; the case is not as compelling as it once was – no one wants to end up with a condition that is easily avoided, but it is naive to think scaring people into using condoms will work – this is a complex behavioural issue that needs better funding & more agencies working together.

        HIV can be very well managed & when diagnosed early the outcomes are generally very good (this is the reality of living with HIV for the past 10 yrs), so on what basis are scaremongering tactics going to be effective? It seems to me that in order to “scaremonger” we must perpetuate the discrimination & stigma that is attached to HIV, how is this a “healthy” intervention?

    2. I don’t agree. In the late 80s and 90s bareback sex was virtually unheard-of, and in my experience wasn’t mentioned, simply because no-one in their right mind would have considered it for a second. For anyone who lived through that era, the current fetishising of bareback sex is deeply shocking. I can only see it as a grotesque failing of education, coupled with cynical greed preying on extreme vacuity.

      1. “Was unheard of” “was not mentioned” sorry to deflate your balloon, as odd as it might seem, bareback sex in Saudi Arabia was very common in the 80s and 90s having personal experience of the same. However, I did not practice bareback sex in Europe and UK during that time… looking back it was on odd decision, but … here I am 20 – 30 years on and still healthy and HIV free.

  7. It is very interesting that barebacking is automatically associated with transmission of HIV. However, very rarely is Hep C mentioned when discussing barebacking. Hep C virus is much more contagious than HIV. Hep C can live outside of the body for 24 hours (HIV 30 seconds max). The we can speak about all the other STI’s … but I suppose these do not make such good headlines.

    1. But the problem is we won’t begin to tackle any problem if we just say ‘Well this also exists, but it doesn’t make good headlines’.

      I don’t get the reluctance among the gay community to deal with HIV effectively or to take ‘control’ of it. I think it might be resistance to be associated with it publicly but the facts are what they are. I read reports that some estimate the number of gay men living with HIV in urban areas could be as high as 1 in 12.

      Sorry but I think that’s far too dangerous and risky to simply ignore it either by saying ‘que sera sera’ as others have or thnking somehow mentioning other STI’s somehow means that it’s less of a concern.

  8. I’m sure some of you heard the story recently that a company called Cal-osha is targeting a bareback porn company called Treasure Island Media? Here’s the definition of what Cal-osha does on their official website: “The Division of Occupational Safety and Health, better known as Cal/OSHA, protects workers and the public from safety hazards through its Occupational Safety and Health, elevator, amusement ride, aerial tramway, ski lift and pressure vessel inspection programs, and also provides consultative assistance to employers.” I guess I can’t blame Cal-osha. Watching porn is a fun way to spend time. Devoting yourself to watching porn is a great way to pretend you’re monitoring an industry that has a record of zero fatalities, nearly no accidents, very little danger at all. Much more fun than dealing with actual tragedies. People need to stop obsessing over gay men having consensual bareback sex. Build and bridge and get over it

    1. a record of zero fatalities

      Dying of HIV-related causes doesn’t count, then?

  9. Spanner1960 14 Feb 2013, 1:08pm

    Ah. This would be the same “gay men” that demand the right to donate blood and think it is discriminatory and homophobic to ban them is it?

    When are people going to start facing up to the reality?

    1. Hey, that is a dumb response, it is not only Gays who contract HIV….

      Many “straight” women contract HIV but who is complaining about “bare-fronting” ?

      Wow!! I Think i just created a new phobia word

  10. NorthernIrishGuest 14 Feb 2013, 5:47pm

    I’m always in two minds about HIV. On the one hand, I’m female and while I am certainly NOT immune to HIV, there is a disproportional link with gay and bisexual men – not lesbians. So I’m never sure if I have any right to say “blah blah blah” on this topic given that I am part of a group which is not predominately affected. On the other, HIV can affect us all, so there’s no reason to associate it with only gay and bisexual men.

    Personally I agree with taking these sites down, even if they are between consenting adults because institutions have a responsibility to the protection of people in private and public areas – and yes, that means in the bedroom too. Nobody in their right mind would consent to contracting HIV. However, I think the glorification of bareback sex needs to stop. The young men who I volunteer with view condoms as cumbersome and ruining the moment. Yet they also view HIV as something “that could never happen me.” Early education is always key!

  11. How about this boys! Stop having anal sex? Or don’t be silly and wrap his willy? I cant believe some men are naive to think bareback sex is the “real” sex, its wrong!

  12. facebook remove pages promoting bareback sex but they don’t remove pages promoting homophobia even if the homophobic pages are reported by members of the public. they(facebook) don’t treat people and groups equally

  13. This is so bad!!!
    I’m a gay man and not only is bareback sex INCREADIBLY wrong and dangerous, but going out of your way to “like” it is just stupid beyond belief.

    Yes bareback sex feels great, but it’s not worth the risk. I’ll admit it, I’ve got caught up in the moment in the past and gone bareback, but I realised I was risking my life each and every time for the sake of a cheap shag and it’s just not on.

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