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US: Pro-gay NFL player Chris Kluwe to release a book of ‘uncensored personal essays’

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  1. PantoHorse 18 Jan 2013, 5:42pm

    This is hilarious, really. I wish him all the best with it, for sure, but sparkleponies?Lustful c0ckm0nsters? I hope his essays deliver everything he seems to be promising :)

  2. I will buy this man’s book.

    He is a superb writer. And him being pro-equality is not the most important or interesting thing about him.

    After his ‘lustful crockmonster’ (oops, a typo) comment, I’ve read a lot of what he’s written – and he’s a man who not onlyu has something to say, he says it with amazing, foul-mouthed class.

    He actually understands the importance of insults. I know that sounds daft, but he can craft an insulting phrase that remains in the mind long after you’ve finished reading the whole article.

    I know that there is a worry about writers being sportsmen (even though Albert Camus was a goalie, he was pretty crap), but there’s something magnificent about a sportsman-writer who piles into his opposition in print with the same vigour he does as an opponent on the field.

    I’m going to buy this man’s book. Not least because I’ll quote his insults months before they become popular in the gay population, but also because it’ll be a year before they are mainstream.

  3. I have no reason to doubt Kluwe’s heterosexuality but “Beautifully Unique Sparkleponies,” is a pretty camp title for a book. I can imagine Chris Colfer writing that book aged 5.

    1. There’s method in the “Beautifully Unique Sparkleponies” madness.
      Basically Chris Kluwe blogged a takedown of Emmet C Burns Jr for his homophobic views on another player and several readers complained about Chris’s use of swearing. His response was this:
      “The swearing is there for a reason. What Emmett C. Burns Jr. wrote, what I responded to, was far more disgusting and foul minded than any simple scatological reference or genital mashup. His words degrade the very essence of the English language with their barely hidden venom and intolerant hate; drag it screaming into the muck of iniquity by wrapping a mantle of seeming reasonableness around corruption and control; masquerade as discourse while screaming their very lie to any Heaven you care to name – I could go on.”
      So he replaced all the swearwords in his subsequent ‘sanitised’ post with sarcastic phrases like ‘Beautifully unique sparkleponies’ to satisfy the tone trolls:

  4. For those that don’t get the reference there’s method in the ‘Beautifully Unique Sparkleponies’ madness.
    It follows a blog he wrote about Emmet C Burns Jr and his homophobic censorship of another NFL player.
    He peppered his response with some choice swearwords and several readers complained.
    As a result Chris Kluwe edited the same blogpost for the tone trolls replacing the swears with snarky phrases like “beautifully unique Sparkleponies” to point out if you’re more upset by some swearing than what Emmet C Burns wrote in the first place there’s something seriously wrong with your moral compass.

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