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Pastor uses banana on TV to show ‘the anus is for exit only’ & claims lesbians have sex with cucumbers

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  1. You know that those who are most obsessed with the sex lives of others usually have something deeply freaky going in their own head…

    We could tell him that more straight people are having anal, that it’s a very common act for them. But let’s be honest, he’s far more interested in whoever is paying to spout this nonsense rather than reasonable discourse.

  2. Lets have a quick show of hands. Who has been putting male genitals into their intestines via their anus?

    Anyone?

    Let’s have another show of hands. Who thinks of bananas as gadgets?

  3. He’s seems like a very disturbed and ignorant man.

    1. He seemed to get more and more agitated the more graphic he got, actually jumping up and down in his chair. It obviously occupies a lot of his thoughts and gets him very excited.

      I have never got this excited thinking about straight couples having sex. Oh….. that’s because I have never thought about what straight people do in bed.

      1. The Infamous Culex 21 Dec 2012, 3:00pm

        With a heterosexual couple, it’s usually the woman who has to sleep in the damp patch.

    2. Could someone please educate this ignorant man and FGS shut him up?!! Hasn’t he heard of something called dildos, and how widespread their use is with heterosexuals?
      By the way, the “host” acted more like a backup of the ignorant “pastor”.

  4. PantoHorse 19 Dec 2012, 6:46pm

    Oh good, it’s Mr Poo Poo again.

    omflg

    1. The Infamous Culex 21 Dec 2012, 3:02pm

      Ice cream manufacturers should sue him!

  5. what an epic fail that man is!!

    1. Helen Wilson 19 Dec 2012, 8:47pm

      His brother and sister both died of AIDS and he is claiming 70% of African gay men have HIV? Seems to me he is hiding something probably lots of guilt about his siblings deaths and is transferring it onto gay Ugandans.

      1. The Infamous Culex 21 Dec 2012, 3:03pm

        Was it he who gave them AIDS?

  6. Mumbo Jumbo 19 Dec 2012, 7:26pm

    Is there an award for the most obvious closet case in the world?

  7. The trans activist’s unwavering and calm rationality against this man’s barbarism and rudeness says a lot really.

  8. Helen Wilson 19 Dec 2012, 8:13pm

    Martin Ssempa (born 1968) is a Ugandan pastor and activist, founder of the Makerere Community Church. He rejects separation of church and state, opposes the usage of condoms to prevent HIV contraction and supports abstinence plus fidelity education in the fight against sexual diseases.
    Ssempa claims to be leading a crusade to “kick sodomy out of Uganda, endorsing proposed legislation in Uganda that makes certain homosexual acts punishable by life in prison or even, in some cases, death.”

    During his teenage years he became a celebrity in East Africa as the national break dancing champion. In 1988, Ssempa was admitted to Makerere University.

    During this time both Ssempa’s brother and sister contracted AIDS. Ssempa sat by their beds as they grew sicker. When they died in 1990, he blamed their promiscuity and feared that his lifestyle would also lead to his death via AIDS; thus, he decided to take action. Ssempa converted to Evangelical Christianity at the Wandegeya Baptist Youth Center

    1. Helen Wilson 19 Dec 2012, 8:23pm

      Looks looks the poo poo man should be better educated about sex and AIDS. The fact he campaigns against the use of condoms shows just how ignorant he is. The very thing that could of saved the lifes of two members of his own family he seeks to deny to the rest of his countries citizens. Is the man deranged? he knows the truth and fails to act instead he goes off on a crusade against gay people the mans a class A nut job.

      1. He seems like he has a learning difficulty not a mental health issue. You’d think someone would have noticed he had the mental age of a very small child by now and given him the help he needs.

    2. Helen Wilson 19 Dec 2012, 8:50pm

      Oh and not that it matters but he was born an illegitimate child.

      He probably has lots of daddy issues and feels inadequate.

  9. He clearly has been watching too much porn

  10. I have never seen anyone hog the spotlight like that.

    “hooligan” is quite an accurate description.

  11. Martin Ssempa the deranged tutti fruity nut case.

  12. It is a shame that the pastor in question isn’t as interested in the anal sex lives of heterosexuals because there is heaps of that on the internet!

    1. Mister Fister 21 Dec 2012, 7:36pm

      It is rare to find straight porn without anal sex scenes. In terms of sheer numbers of straights to gays there has to be far more instances of heterosexual anal acts than there are of homosexual anal acts. Also, one must not forget that not all gay men have anal sex.

  13. johnny33308 19 Dec 2012, 9:54pm

    I actually had a ‘chat’ with this person via comments relative to his ‘Kill the Gays bill’ several years ago on the ABC news website ….he is just as evil when he writes as he is in person. I won the cerebral brawl and he slinked away with his tail between his legs (my teenage niece joined in on ‘beating up’ on him, and was was far meaner than I ever could be….. hahahaha….I think she was the one he was running from when he abruptly left the conversation!)…I enjoyed myself quite a lot, in fact….I am almost ashamed to say…LOL!!!
    He is the most disturbed person I’ve ever interacted with, and I’m 61 yrs old and have seen LOTS!

  14. He is gagging for c*ck, top and bottom!

  15. I’m just shocked.

    I never thought that Ugandan TV could generate blue screen backgrounds!

  16. Given that this goon is a celibate, as prescribed by his cult, pastor.

    What does he know about human sexuality.

    Nowt. Nothing Zilch.

    Therefore please P!ss off brainwashed idiot and keep your mouth shut.

  17. Just how many hours a day does he spend thinking about gay sex?? What a pathetic, inadequate little man.

    See a therapist, Ssempa, before you make yourself even more of a laughing stock.

    1. The trouble is, it’s all very well for us to see him as the laughing-stock he is, what is worrying is the thought that people in Uganda might be swayed by his deranged hysteria.

      1. I’m sure some Ugandans will. The country (and some others) could do with some education about LGBT people so that idiots like this are laughed at for talking rubbish, and so that the nasty, hate-spreading US fundies are put on the next plane home.

        Prejudice flourishes where there’s ignorance – whatever the country.

  18. 1He’s seems like a very disturbed and ignorant man.
    2You know that those who are most obsessed with the sex lives of others usually have something deeply freaky going in their own head
    3Does that man calling him self poster know that the the word of GOD say in

    Luke 6:37 “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. who gave him rights to judge others

  19. He is of course totally correct.
    The anus is for exit only.
    And again he is right homosexuals and lesbians are not normal, that is why they don’t have equal rights.

    Uganda governs its country how it wishes to, and no one has any business interfering in it.

  20. There is a wrong pronoun for the trans man at the bottom of the article.

  21. That There Other David 19 Dec 2012, 10:49pm

    You know, when I look at fruit and veg I see food. What madness goes on in this pastor’s head that he can only see sexual acts?

    1. The Infamous Culex 21 Dec 2012, 5:14pm

      Is his problem sublimated cannibalism?

  22. Hang on a minute- not all gay men do anal-same as not all straight men do vaginal. But-hey-why should I be interested anyway-its their business not mine (unless I happen to be partcipating!)

  23. Well, anyone who has had a colonoscopy (wince) might agree that on some occasions the old chocolate whizz-way does tend to more easily favour egress rather than ingress.

    But the guy is still a total loon.

    1. “the old chocolate whizz-way does tend to more easily favour egress rather than ingress”

      No. Absolutely not my experience, Sasha!

      Chocolate doing an egress in the “whizz-way” has never produced in me the same mind-blowing, unbelievable, fireworks of total body-pleasure that dick manages during an ingress!

      But I guess we’re not all wired up the same way.

  24. How much maturity ! Next time I think he is going to use sock puppets or LEGO dolls.

  25. Another day – another African savage speaks out.

    1. Do you call all homophobes savages or is it just the black ones? Would you call a white south African homophobe a savage? Are you a little bit of a racist ass?

    2. Do you call all homophobes savages or is it just the black ones? Would you call a white south African homophobe a savage? Are you a little bit of a racist a$$?

    3. Do you call all homophobes savage5 or is it just the black ones? Would you call a white south African homophobe a savage? Are you a little bit of a raci$t a5$?

      Apologies if this comment appears more than once the PN comment system seems to be censoring a word somewhere…

      1. Joss, It’s a good word. I have used the it before to describe people who try to stir up hatred for GLBT people. For example, I have applied it to the Westboro Baptists, Rebecca Kadaga and various Scottish bishops. Savage means “uncivilised, barbaric” according to the dictionary and I am fully entitled to use the word in that context. Do you think of black people when you see the word? Perhaps it is you who are racist.

        1. Robert in S. Kensington 20 Dec 2012, 12:41pm

          If I recall rightly, didn’t those American westerns some of us of a certain age bracket used to watch during the 50s and early 60s often use the word to describe the Indians shooting arrows at cowboys? I would hear it many times.

          You are right, savage has several different interpretations. I totally concur, it is appropriate to apply it to hate-mongers, especially religious nutters of the various denominations and those in opposition to equality issues in both Houses of Parliament. The equal marriage debate has produced some of the most savage commentaries, overhwelmingly from Tory bigots.

        2. Robert in S. Kensington 20 Dec 2012, 12:42pm

          If I recall rightly, didn’t those American westerns some of us of a certain age bracket used to watch during the 50s and early 60s often use the word to describe the Indians shooting arrows at cowboys? I would hear it many times.

          You are right, savage has several different interpretations. I totally concur, it is appropriate to apply it to hate-mongers, especially religious nutters of the various denominations and those in opposition to equality issues in both Houses of Parliament. The equal marriage debate has produced some of the most savage commentaries, overwhelmingly from Tory bigots.

      2. Joss, I’ve just checked the Oxford English Dictionary and it gives as the foremost meaning of “savage” the following:

        “Of animals: Wild, undomesticated, untamed. Often, and in later use exclusively, with the contextual implication of ferocity.”

        So Cal’s usage was entirely appropriate and not (necessarily) racist.

        1. Staircase2 20 Dec 2012, 4:28pm

          No – it was racist
          The man’s not an animal for fucks sake! You don’t promote Human Rights by denigrating people… That’s the whole bloody point!

          a) ‘animal’ is used as a method of abuse
          b) the irony is that animals really wouldn’t give a flying fcvk what clothes the Transman chooses to wear, who he wishes to have sex with or how…

    4. Staircase2 20 Dec 2012, 4:24pm

      Why are you cheapening the argument against the bloody idiot pastor by being deliberately racist?

      Shame on you – you’re taking away from the actual debate by introducing your own ignorance

  26. Oh you school look up his ‘eat da poo-poo’ video! Apparently we all ‘lick da aaanus like da ice-ream, den sometimes also da poo-poo comes out and Dey eat it’

    A) rimming should never be done like licking an ice cream as it won’t be very satisfactory

    B) I can tell you, if someone took a dump in my mouth, I’m going to hit him with an open fist… Hard and repeatedly!

    The guy is a total nutter but I do feel sorry for our sisters in Uganda. It’s horrid.

  27. Well, incredible to see what LGBT Ugandans are up against… Raving bloody lunatics.

  28. Felix Garnet-Simister 20 Dec 2012, 3:33am

    Pepe Onziema is a trans MAN so he does not have sex “with other women”. He may have sex with women or men but he isn’t the “other woman”.

  29. Jock S. Trap 20 Dec 2012, 9:47am

    More proof that these vile people incite hatred and violence through mis-information, lies and assumption. Not through facts and knowledge.

    It’s disgusting what that poor woman went through let alone anyone in Ugandan society who witnesses this discriminating behaviour.

    The fact that this Law Uganda wants to introduce it constantly put over the heads of the Ugandan LGBTI community is itself surely tantamount to torture and goes against any human right just in itself.

    It’s time the President acted to quash this ridiculous bigoted behaviour and stopped torturing it’s own people!

  30. The banana was the smartest thing on that entire interview.

  31. Bloody hell! What a BULLY! I stopped watching after two minutes. I couldn’t bear any more of his outright bullying! When the woman seeks to cut his monologue he simply won’t allow it!

    It reminded me that there are dozens of UK religious channels available on my Sky box but of course I never view them, and these bigots are constantly peddling their nonsense into the homes of the gullible.

  32. Ssempa is a tyrannical idiot who has simply gone banana’s thinking too much about imaginary gay activities and working himself into a lather of excitement. I wonder what his fevered imagination will come up with next?

  33. Staircase2 20 Dec 2012, 4:21pm

    What a bunch of bloody idiots!

    At first I thought that it was just ‘the pastor’ who was the ignorant one then the presenter jumped into the stupid corner with him, asking why there was no ‘H’ in LGBTi…!

    I thought the Transman held himself up very well in the face of extreme ignorance and stupidity. It was clear to me where the insanity lay around the table…!

    Has anyone fact checked hyis claims about HIV infection in sub saharan Africa?

  34. The Infamous Culex 21 Dec 2012, 2:54pm

    I am extremely annoyed with “Pastor” Martin Ssempa.

    By his comments about analingus and coprophagy, he has put me off chocolate ice cream for life.

  35. I went along to a church a few weeks ago on the behest of a friend who didn’t want to go to somewhere new alone. When I walked through the door, a guy at the back of the church caught my eye, my Gaydar went mad. I’ve been wrong on a couple of occasions so just went with it really. Besides he was with his wife and they had 2 young children.

    He spent most of the service looking in my direction. At the end of the service when introductions were being made he shook my hand and didn’t say “oh Hi I’m such and such blah de blah” but instead launched into one of the most disturbing homophobic diatribes I’ve ever heard.

    He talked about God’s disdain for the disgusting lives of homosexuals, how concept of marriage is being perverted, about the anal opening being exit only etc. This Ssemba person seems to be cut from the same cloth I’d say. Too much time spent thinking about something which shouldn’t be of any concern to him at all.

  36. I kept watching until the Sports segment (16ish minutes in), there is clearly a problem in that country as that presenter started preaching himself.

  37. AhContraire 23 Sep 2013, 1:48pm

    Are homosexual acts really the same as being left handed or right handed?
    Are homosexual acts really the same as having black skin color or white skin color?
    Are homosexual acts really the same as having curly hair or straight hair?

    Or, are homosexual acts really the same as being unclean or clean?

    That is, Doesn’t the medical community recommend that you, “Wash your hands after you go to the bathroom.”?

    Yet, now there are some in the medical community that now say it’s OK to “Sleep with the waste that gets flushed down in the toilet?” and that it’s possible to live a perfectly normal life.

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