Reader comments · Fighter Alex Reid: ‘Sex with men doesn’t make you gay or bisexual, just like a cigarette doesn’t make you a smoker’ · PinkNews

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Fighter Alex Reid: ‘Sex with men doesn’t make you gay or bisexual, just like a cigarette doesn’t make you a smoker’

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  1. I’m so sorry-this is just SO funny! Talk about living in denial-this really takes it to extremes!!

    1. Well, based only on what is written here in the article, it seems to me this guy has been a bit adventurous and tried a bit of this and a bit of that in a healthy way and does in fact prefer the opposite sex. I think we should be encouraging that kind of openness and adventure, rather than people being terrified of being known to have ever tried anything “kinky” or to have had sex with a person of the same gender.

      1. 17 Dec 2012, 2:54pm

        Yes indeed, there seems to be a need to pigeon hole people, which happens in most groups? People are complex sexual beings who sometimes fall in love with someone of the same sex. I wish there was no gay/straight, just people.

        1. Dismissing his involvement with men as “Just experimentation” and meaningless just helps contributed to bi-phobia and bisexual invisibility.
          You want people to be just people? Stop denying bisexuality. This binary thinking of you are either gay or straight is the reason why people can’t just be people and love whom they wish to love.

          1. I am bisexual and have said so before on here. I also believe that a large number of people are bisexual, perhaps more than are completely straight or gay, though often closeted. Closeted because it”s often assumed that someone who comes out as bi is really gay but reluctant to come out as gay.

            I just think that it’s unfortunate that these compartments deemed are necessary at all

      2. it seems to me this guy has been a bit adventurous and tried a bit of this and a bit of that in a healthy way and does in fact prefer the opposite sex

        Totally agree with you there, Eddy.

    2. PantoHorse 17 Dec 2012, 3:15pm

      I don’t think he’s living in denial at all. He’s saying, quite openly, he’s tried a bit of this, but of that, and that actually he prefers women. For some people it is entirely possible to do that and not be polarised in either way. Good for him to be so comfortable in his skin, and the hugely macho world of cage fighting, to go on Kyle’s show and say that.

      1. Where is he not “polarised” in one way?

        1. Because he’s not denying his past experiences, perhaps?

  2. That There Other David 17 Dec 2012, 1:06pm

    Yeah, and I’m not gay either. Neither is my husband or any of the men either of us ever slept with before we got together.

    Anyone else think this is Alex Reid trying desperately to not appear as dull as he seems to be?

  3. To be fair, the only person that can label Alex Reid is Alex Reid, and to label him yourself makes you a terrible person.

    1. The subtext here is that he doesn’t want to be tarred with the gay brush, even though he engages in homosexual behaviour. I am more than happy to label him a twat for this. For I certainly don’t want to be associated with him or people like him.

      1. PantoHorse 17 Dec 2012, 3:17pm

        I don’t think that’s what he’s saying, about being ‘tarred with the gay brush’. Plenty of people come forward and talk about attraction being something mutable and that they’re just people who are attracted to other people.

        Not wanting to associate with people who display bisexual tendancies makes you a twat, not them.

        1. You’re not very bright and you are clearly a desperate self-loather, so I don’t want to debate with you too vigorously (you are clearly quite fragile), but he doesn’t identify as bisexual, either. He doesn’t put any label on it other than ‘experimentation’ because, like you, Reid is a self-loather.

    2. Wow, brilliantly said Some Dewd, and clearly most on here unanimously agree, which must send a shiver down the spines of the minority fringe of gay reactionaries who insist any same-sex dabbling or mild flirtation renders one gay.

      Naturally their insecurity and need to bolster our numbers makes them resort to such desperate tactics, but so refreshing that people like Reid can be open and honest about their sexual experimentation and not feel the need to restrict themselves to confined and limiting boxes.

      1. he pretty much restricts himself to confined and limiting box of heterosexuality, but you seem to be happy with that, right?

  4. You try a cigarette because you think you might like it. I haven’t tried eating a sheeps eyeball because I don’t think I would like it.

    Why would a 100% straight man want to try sex with a man? I definitely don’t want to try sex with a woman. He may well prefer women but I don’t think he is being fully honest here.

  5. I have to agree with him. I’m a Gay man who has had sex with a few women in my day…and that doesn’t make me str8 or even Bi sexual, just a Gay guy who has had sex with women. I also have a few str8 friends who ‘help out when we are busy’ as they put it…But there will always be those who need to label, pigeon hole and judge people even though we hate it when its done to us.

    1. Me too. I had sex with two women. Doesn’t make me “mixed-up”, hypocritical, confused, or even bisexual. I tried it. Didn’t like it. I’m gay.

      Am I 100% gay? No. Nobody is. Just like nobody is 100% straight.

      1. Nobody is gay. Really? And what about me, and other real gay men who find women completely unattractive? Why would i want to have sex with something that completely turns me of.

    2. ‘help out when we are busy’

      I haven’t heard that one before

      1. It was coined by one of my male cricket playing friends who identifies as str8 but who very occasionally (once every few years or when the opportunity presents itself) has sex with another guy.

        1. He’s a pathetic closet case.

    3. Some people are just somewhere in between, like you and your friends.

      1. I am NOT in between (between what??) how rude of you to assume you can pigeon hole me after reading that I quite clearly identify as GAY. MY not defined by what I do physically during sex or whom I do it with..but by whom I can love…I have had sex with both men and women but I know I can only love a man. Keep your filthy hands of MY sexuality

        1. You get aroused by women? I don’t. Our sexuality is different. And i’m gay. I don’t want to be associated with people who sleep with women.

          1. A bigot is a prejudiced person who is intolerant of any opinions differing from their own or intolerant of people of different political views, ethnicity, race, class, religion, profession, sexuality or gender. You are a bigot Sir.

    4. You are not ‘straight’ if you mess around with other men – you are bisexual at the very least.

  6. I love it! To be a woman who has had sex with women during an experimental stage is normal. But a guy comes forward to say he has experimented with men and it is big news and we (as in the gay community) say he has to be either gay and in denial or making it up to make himself more interesting.

    Yes, because we do own the rights to all men on men experimentation. Get a grip (on something over than that)!

    1. That There Other David 17 Dec 2012, 1:34pm

      That’s a lot of experimenting Alex seems to be doing. He’s either very slow in making his mind up or there’s something he’s not admitting to himself.

      I’ve got no idea why he doesn’t just say he’s a bit bi. If he’s into girls but likes an occasional bit of man-love that’s fair enough.

  7. ...Paddyswurds 17 Dec 2012, 1:35pm

    Not a fan of this eejit, but I have to say I kinda agree with him about straight men giving it a try. In the last 45 years 99% of the 60 plus men I have spent a night with, all bar one are now married with kids. one of them “gave it a try” the night before he got married. In the mid 70s, another sought me out after giving him a lift home from the pub, found me, dumped his girlfriend and we spent eight weeks where the rest of the world didn’t exist and hardly ever left the bed. We both lost nearly three stone weight and were obsessed with each other. He went on to marry and 35 years later he is a grandfather with 4 kids. That was in Boston Ma; he was from Ireland. With several similar. By the way 35 of those years and probably 40 of those men were in the Ireland, so it happens ; regularly! Another thing over the years 5 straight lads approached me for advice on “down there” problems. All needed circumcision bar one.

    1. ...Paddyswurds 17 Dec 2012, 1:43pm

      …and his problem was a carry over from school. He has a rather short foreskin so that his knob peeped out like and acorn in its cup and a boy in gym showers jeered at him and falsely said it was like that because the lad wank*d too much. He was fine and was very relieved when i told him so as this had bothered him for nearly 5 years, especially as he did indulge himself but no more than any of us did when we were at school. Bullying comes in all forms it seems….

      1. Ahh those Irish guys….they love a bit of this and a bit of that as long as there is plenty of it,,,,lol! (I’m Irish, I should know)

      2. WTF are you going on about?

        1. Suddenly Last Bummer 17 Dec 2012, 9:14pm

          I am p1ssing myself laughing at Paddy’s ramblings regarding boys with foreskin problems. Talk about derailing a discussion.

          1. ...Paddyswurds 19 Dec 2012, 7:06pm

            …I succeeded tho….lol

      3. Have you been drinking?

        1. Feeling Sick 17 Dec 2012, 8:42pm

          I think that was a Paddywank.

    2. Suddenly Last Bummer 17 Dec 2012, 9:15pm

      You lost nearly three stone in weight?! Was the guy’s name Atkins by any chance Paddy?

      1. LMFAO!!!

  8. Robert in S. Kensington 17 Dec 2012, 1:44pm

    The only down side to this is that Reid’s comments could enforce the religious nutters’ claim that we choose our orientation or we can be cured by sleeping with someone of the opposite sex, or more absurdly through prayer.

    I don’t think he’s too bright, just an attention seeker.

  9. How many gay people have slept with opposite-sex partners before? It doesn’t make us bisexual, nor would we wish to be labelled that way. Alex Reid’s sex life isn’t even news.

    1. A lot of gay people have slept with opposite sex partners in early attempts to convince themselves that they weren’t, in effect, gay. Also, many did so as a means of “conforming” or hiding.

      I wouldn’t exactly confuse THAT fact with this fighter willingly having sex with men because he was curious.

      I’m gay, I was never “curious” about sex with women. In much the same way that I was never curious about sex with a chair, or with an animal. Women were never one of the choices for me as objects of sexual attraction. So why would I be “curious” to “try” it?

      What’s news here isn’t that Alex Reid had sex with dudes.
      What’s news is how much of an idiot he is about it, and how silly his protestations to the contrary make him sound.

      The guy has had sex with more than one dude? Then he’s SOME level of bisexual. Why deny that? What’s news is not that he’s bisexual. What’s news is his silly, self-destructive, deluded, way of denying it.

      1. Yeah, you are absolutlely right. Gay men who were forced to sleep with women by society and that man who willingly slept with men are speaking about completely different things.

    2. I haven’t!

  10. I’ve known loads of men who have sex with other men and don’t identify as gay, I agree with some dewd, it’s about how he identifies, that doesn’t always equate with denial.

    1. This is one of the reasons why ONS surveys which ask people how they identify are so inacurate

    2. If I identify as martian it doesn’t make me one.

  11. I’ve had sex with women, doesn’t make me straight

    1. It makes you bi.

      1. does not!

  12. Aussie Gay Activist Paul Mitchell 17 Dec 2012, 2:34pm

    Wow he is a hot man, who cares about labels (straight, gay or bi – I do not care so long as the man is hot that’s all that matters). Wow he is a sexy man! He can cage fight me any day in my bed!

    If your rich (earns over $200,000), in uniform (such as US Marine Soldier, Policeman, Fireman), tall, white or corekasian, hot with abs or six pack, 100% male (no transgender or trannies or cross-dressers please) between the age of 20 to 30, straight, gay or bi – you can date me anytime!

    60 years from now there will be no labels because people’s sexual orientation will become accepted and normalised and the terms “straight”, “gay”, “lesbian” or “bisexual” are starting to becoming outdated or obsolete!

    Unless you are in the US States of Texas, Oklahoma and Utah for that matter in the year 2072 – will even still have problems with gay sex and gay people (it is really dark red in those states)!

    1. You’re a very strange species of political activist, Mr. Mitchell. You seem to have quite a liking for a person’s appearance and income.

      1. That There Other David 17 Dec 2012, 3:03pm

        He seems to be confusing this site with Gaydar ;-)

        1. And a nice line in transphobia into the bargain.

          1. Just a question in order to understand more. How does stating a preference for a type, even if its a negative ie No Blondes, No Bears, No Twinks, No Trannies make a person phobic???

          2. That There Other David 17 Dec 2012, 4:50pm

            For a start using the word “Tranny” is damn well offensive. Christ, are you really that insensitive?!?

        2. Easily done!

    2. The first two paragraphs of this post confirms what I have thought about you for a while, GAPM.

      You’re a bell end.

    3. Suddenly Last Bummer 17 Dec 2012, 9:20pm

      Wow, I have never seen Caucasian spelt as ”corekasian”. Are you ‘stoooopid’ by any chance?

    4. Corkasian? Come on. Get spell check and have the balls to admit your inner racism.

    5. Corekasian? Oh come on! Get spell check and have the balls to admit your inner racism.

  13. Aussie Gay Activist Paul Mitchell 17 Dec 2012, 2:36pm

    Speaking of labels…

    “Gay marriage” in 2012 becomes just “marriage” in 2052!

  14. He’s just a confused man who doesn’t have the intelligence to understand who or what he is.

  15. This mans taken too many blows to the head clearly

  16. Staircase2 17 Dec 2012, 3:06pm

    Bit of a non story to be honest…

    1. there is one credible part, where he says he “bangs his head against a wall” – clearly!

  17. Whatever gets you through the night Alex!!!!

  18. Exactly right.

    Men are all made the same and there are straight men who have a physical need like some gay men to, erm, have their prostate muscle massaged, and this they sometimes obtain through physical interaction with other men, but it is always sex devoid of emotional attachment as alas I know only too well (sigh).

    Of course some straight men are fortunate enough to have understanding wives who are prepared to share their vibrating toys and even use them on their “power-bottom” hubbies…

    1. I would also point out the vast demand for “chicks with dicks” – half way house transexuals who are in huge demand by 100% hetero men who desire the physical sensation of rear end sex delivered by someone who they can perceive as female.

      How on earth can that make such men in any way gay as the radical gay fringe would have us believe?

      1. Oh, and titter ye not but lest we forget the burgeoning market for strap-on dildos for hetero couples?

  19. Sleep with MEN = Gay!!, Sleep with both men and women = Bi. Sleep with a Man now and then = YOUR Gay!!

  20. PLONKER……

  21. Maybe he’s telling the truth if experimentation meant having sex only once or twice. If it’s tens or hundreds of times and not as a paid prostitute or porn star, that’s well beyond experimentation and into bisexual territory.

  22. Ewww talk about danmaged goods

  23. A stupid analogy from a stupid man!

  24. I hate to say it, but he is right. One messed in the head. skanky dude, but he is right.

  25. I’ve had sex with two women. Still not straight, so I agree.

    1. But not a 100 per cent gay, either. Not historically, anyway. It’s not a crime either way, so why the big deal for Alex Reid? I suspect the only reason he’s revealing the details of his deeply uninteresting sex life is because someone was about to out him.

  26. correct me if wrong , but men who sleep with other men and dont consider them self gay?!?!? Are they not closet queens

  27. Oh yeah, I’m vegetarian, but I eat meat!

    How stupid.

  28. Enough with the ignorance already, you lot sound exactly like the religious extremists who think our sexuality is a mental illness, refusing to accept what people want! Don’t you all see the hypocricy of your own statements?

    I’ve studied male sexuality for more than ten years. I’ve researched the work of Kinsey and Shere Hite, I’ve conducted surveys and research about what men really think when it comes to sex and other men.

    What a lot of you seem completely ignorant of is that the three labels are MAN MADE. They were created by man to easily categorize something that cannot be.

    No other species operates on this ridiculous grading system. No other life on this planet needs to label sexuality, and same sex activity exists in all observed species.

    How do you categorize a fetish? Does a guy who likes wearing knickers also automatically enjoy wearing makeup?

    Please educate yourselves, sexuality is not as simple as you all seem to believe.

    1. Well, it’s not we who make it simple, it’s that man who denies that there can be shades of grey.

      1. He can sit in as grey a shade as he likes, but it’s his decision as to whether he calls it black, white, grey, green, blue, tartan, peppermint, anything. I respect his right not to use the word “grey” – I may not agree with it, but it’s not my call.

  29. Human sexuality is a lot more complicated than many of us realize. It’s very easy defining your own sexuality if you’re gay (like me) or straight but for those who drift in between, it must be so much more confusing and frustrating.

    This man might just be doing this for the publicity or what ever…but he might also be very confused. In the end only he can define who he really is. We shouldn’t judge him since we know nothing about him.

    In the end it doesnt matter what your sexuality is. All people should be able to marry who ever they want and love who ever they want. PERIOD

  30. I am head over heels with Ashley Roberts but that doesn’t make me straight!!!

    1. Matt the Bruins fan 18 Dec 2012, 12:31am

      While I think he’s exactly right that experimentation does not equal orientation, there is a point of returning to the well enough times that it ceases being experimentation and becomes an attraction/interest that indicates bisexuality. The article says that his relationship with Houghton broke up because of another man. Presumably by that point he had a good idea of what he liked, and if it was sex with a man despite being in a LTR with a woman I doubt that his claims of heterosexuality are sincere.

  31. Aaron Spence 18 Dec 2012, 1:57am

    If we start to abandon self-definition, we get dangerously close to labels and boxes territory which I don’t feel at all comfortable.

    He doesn’t define as gay or bi? His call. Surprised and saddened by some of the comments here.

    1. You shouldn’t be surprised of another homophobic attack then. They are done mostly by these people in denial, who you support.

  32. Jock S. Trap 18 Dec 2012, 9:39am

    Pack of denial, anyone?

  33. “All I want is credibility and respect.


    Really? Well that ship sailed and then sank the moment he associated himself with Katie Price.

  34. glasgow1975 18 Dec 2012, 11:41pm

    “What people do privately, so what?”
    Indeed, but talking about it on Jeremy Kyle, in every tabloid, trash mag & going out to public events in fishnets & bra doesn’t exactly count as ‘doing it privately’ you dumb f*ckwit closet case!

  35. Lets face it. He is just a closet case!

  36. Another insecure whiner who has an issue with the words bisexual or gay. Self loathing self hating homophobe.

  37. Blimey. So much negativity about this. Human sexuality is a rich canvas. I’ve had girlfriends but still think of myself as Gay rather than bi. What’s the difference?

  38. I don’t think Alex Reid is gay, the man clearly enjoys having sex with women. But maybe Reid is bisexual? Reid does admit a sexual attraction to men so he’s not straight But Reid does have a point isn’t sexuality a spectrum?

  39. your gay bro….

  40. I have had sex with a woman Im not bi

    1. If you can sexually function with a woman, I am absolutely sure that you are bisexual (though you prefer men, you will always be bisexual) . Anyway, it’s not the same thing a change from gay to heterosexual (or rather bisexual) than a change from heterosexual to gay (or rather, maybe really gay or maybe bisex), because the only thing repressed is the homosexuality (because of homophobia and heterosexism), the heterosexuality is never repressed at all (never, never, never…). Therefore, I can think that someone was a gay or bisex who repressed his feelings. But there is nothing as a repressed heterosexual man who pretends to be a gay man, that thing doesn’t exist.

  41. (1/2) I was reading old posts and I found this. I only want to say something; unfortunately the most of bisexual guys are very repressed, and they always try to find the most unbelievable pretexts to maintain they are totally straight. A thing is clear, if a guy feels attraction for men, he is at least bisexual (if he likes women too, he would be bisexual. And though he supposedly prefers women, he continues being bisexual. On the other hand, If he does not like women at all, he would be fully gay). Therefore, the feelings of sexual attraction are an enough reason for determining the sexual orientation (though these feelings never have been materialized); but if in addition to it, a guy materializes it and he has (or had) sex with other guy voluntarily and satisfactorily (don’t care if it was sporadic facts, or even that there was no sexual penetration), he cannot maintain that he is absolutely straight and not gay at all because it is absolutely absurd.

  42. (2/2) We must be minimally coherent and courageous. Besides, this nonsense (which we can also hear frequently from gay porn actors) is absolutely ridiculous. Then we don’t be ridiculous, please (if we are gay or bi, we must naturally admit it).

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