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Comment: Addicted to Grindr

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  1. Grindr is not a place to look for something more than meaningless sex.

    1. I disagree with that analysis; like every other social setting what you get out of it is directly related to what you’re looking for/ willing to put into it.

      No doubt, the easiest/ fastest thing to get out of it is sex because little contact other than physical is required, anything deeper is going to take a bit more effort – that doesn’t mean it’s not possible or that nobody is doing it.

      1. What I mean is – you’re making it hard for yourself, looking for a guy amongst a load of others who might just want sex. More chance of disappointment or feeling like there’s “no decent guys out there”, when there are and you’re just looking in the wrong place.

        1. Not really, the ones just looking for sex are pretty obvious, it’s not hard to discriminate between them. And nor do I use it as my only avenue for finding someone :-)

  2. Grindr = death

    1. Spanner1960 10 Apr 2012, 1:24pm

      *Ouch!*

  3. Why should anyone be interested in this rather boring man’s fetid experiences treating himself & others as flesh. So much gay writing & performance has dealt with this. Can’t we have a gay voice who declares different interests. It’s not as if this fella even offers any particular insight into his “addiction” (it’s not an addiction, it’s a habit).

    1. Yup. Dull, vacuous s h i t e. And not particularly well written dull, vacuous s h i t e.

    2. @ Joe Smoe, have you actually seen the show or are you talking out of your a**e?

      1. I’m talking about the article, twit – which is supposedly a preview of the show’s content.

  4. Anyone else think that Grindr is, like, the most incidious example of the shallow slutty side of gay life?

    1. Nope – what’s wrong with having sex? It is what it is. I’m not ashamed of it, it’s simply a symptom of human nature.

      If woman were as randy as a lot of men are, the straight world would be like it too.

      1. Any more banal observations to share with us? Your level of philosophical observation is barely teenage. The idea that sex is some kind of equivalent to tennis is an ideology with has turned the gay scene into one big suicide pact.

      2. “If woman were as randy as a lot of men are”

        I except you know a lot about the sexual habits of women and are able to back up that bs.

        Women don’t use apps like Grindr because they are more vulnerable than men, not because they don’t want to get laid.

        1. *expect

      3. Spanner1960 10 Apr 2012, 4:07pm

        Nobody is claiming there isn’t anything wrong in having sex.
        What some of us are saying is stop being a total slut.

        1. Haha! I’m in a monogamous relationship with my fiance. I don’t, however, see an issue with someone being a slut? If they can cope with it emotionally and they’re safe: what is the problem? Don’t let social rules dictate, gay people should be more then aware of that, by now.

          And women aren’t as lustful as men…I’ll try and explain why I think this is (and I’m sure I was taught this at some point, I’m not quite clever enough to come up with this all on my own!)

          Evolutionary speaking, it suits humankind for men to be more inclined to impregnate as many females as possible and it suits for women to be more maternal and less randy – as then they’ll be more interested in looking after the kids than getting another lay. This arrangement is part of what helped the human race survive and expand.

          That’s why women are not, on the whole, as promiscuous as men…(on the whole! Always exceptions.) That’s why, on the whole, women are more emotional and empathetic.Evolution.

          1. Just found many articles that support my point:

            Here’s one:

            http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/14616660110119331#preview

          2. Women’s sex drive increases with age and men’s decreases. This has been scientifically proven by studies into the hormone levels of male and female participants.

            “Evolutionary speaking, it suits humankind for men to be more inclined to impregnate as many females as possible and it suits for women to be more maternal and less randy”

            This is a THEORY usually propagated by male scientists, often cited as an excuse by serial male adulterers and daily mail readers. Women do not like to talk about sex and desire especially to men because they have a lot more to lose if they are seen as slutty and they are, as I said earlier much more physically vulnerable than men.

          3. Have you read past the first page of that study James?

          4. Joss, studies have been done and shown both ideas to have merit! So who is right? We disagree.

            Woman get hornier when they’re ovulating: fact. That’s an evolutionary trait. So on one hand you might agree with that, but with the other, you dismiss the idea that many men might be hornier than women, on the whole, and enjoy ‘short-term’ relationships with many partners more than women do. Which would also be an evolutionary trait.

            I do agree that your social point is also true, but I think it’s compounded with what I’m discussing here. Anything to do with sexual reproduction is heavily influenced by the key aspects of evolution.

        2. Why should someone stop being a slut?

          1. Hiv, chlamydia, hepatitus, syphilis, emotional wretchedness & a heart grown cold.

          2. As long as you’re safe and can deal with it emotionally, then there is NOTHING wrong.

          3. Spanner1960 11 Apr 2012, 10:09pm

            James:
            The word issafer. No sex is 100% safe.
            Things can and do go wrong. If one has sex, one takes a calculated risk. The more promiscuous one is, the lower the odds.

  5. Spanner1960 10 Apr 2012, 1:24pm

    Congratulations to Dial-a-Shag.
    I’m sure there will be many more pointless hook-ups to come.

  6. another product placement veiled as comment feature

  7. dreadful all that’s wrong with the gay environment.

  8. P.H.Davies 10 Apr 2012, 2:14pm

    Did anyone proofread this article? Very sloppily written – Pink News needs an editor and badly!

    1. Spanner1960 10 Apr 2012, 4:08pm

      They have, except nobody bothers proofing.

  9. …what are “daggy daggys”?

  10. I’m sorry but I just don’t like Grindr. Sure it’s good to find people who want sex but other than that everything else is rare. I tried for a couple of months to find some people who were similar to me, I wanted friendship. It’s very hard though when you get people wanting to hook up with you for nothing more than sex.

    Its not a good app for anything else really. Older men are continually asking to hook up, and other crap like that, some are older than my father. It’s also full of guys with egos which makes it even more difficult. Seriously, if you might find a guy who wants to be friends on there or have a relationship with you but filtering through all the sexual noise is in my opinion, not worth the time and energy.

    Grindr is certainly not what you make of it, I would avoid it if you are looking for something meaninful. But do try it for yourself, this is just my experience from the app itself. ^^;

    1. I agreed with everything you said except the ageist bollocks about older men and how old your father is…

      You damaged a really serious point with that

  11. I’m sorry but I just don’t like Grindr. Sure it’s good to find people who want sex but other than that everything else is rare. I tried for a couple of months to find some people who were similar to me, I wanted friendship. It’s very hard though when you get people wanting to hook up with you for nothing more than sex.

    Its not a good app for anything else really. Older men are continually asking to hook up, and other crap like that, some are older than my father. It’s also full of guys with egos which makes it even more difficult. Seriously, if you might find a guy who wants to be friends on there or have a relationship with you but filtering through all the sexual noise is in my opinion, not worth the time and energy.

    Grindr is certainly not what you make of it, I would avoid it if you are looking for something meaninful. But do try it for yourself, this is just my experience from the app itself. ^^;

    1. “I wanted friendship.” I think that was your first mistake!

      Is it not obvious, by reputation, what this app is for?

      Even people who write that they’re after ‘friendship’ on there can easily be lying. They’ve probable said that because they know friends might see and they don’t want to be judged, or even perhaps because their boyfriend might stumble across their profile…

  12. Oops, Sorry for the double post! :3

  13. “I’m on Grindr all the time. Or at least I was. Using Grindr you get the opportunity to talk with people all the time and you’re not just stuck with yourself.”

    So true, Gavin. And I especially get the point about Grindr enabling you to be blunt to people, which you wouldn’t dream of being to their faces, of course.

    WTF is our ADHD-riddled world becoming when so many of us are too anxious and unconfident about meeting people in the flesh that they find solace in a sleazy iPhone app?!

    The reason it all ends in a quick shag and nothing more substantial is because we have forgotten how to interact socially except on the basest of levels (i.e. sexually), spending the rest of our waking social hours hiding away on Facebook and Twitter in search of, ahem, “friends”.

    Gavin’s truly sad, nay wretched, article underlines all that is truly scary and destructive about what gay life is rapidly becoming:- a scene of antisocial, dead-eyed zombies living for the next ping from their Grindr App…

  14. “Once you get very comfortable with the fact that it’s completely devoid of emotion…”

    Is this guy for real?

    You really get off with feeling comfortable in a void that is devoid of emotion?

    Do you realise you have just perfectly summed up the classic character trait of a sociopath?

    Indeed, I am sure the sex that 90 per cent of those who hook up via Grindr IS devoid of emotion and ultimately unfulfilling:- sex for sex’s sake, no more, no less.

    Mechanical, unfeeling, but another ejaculatory conquest to notch up on the bed post.

    Now, imagine all that energy that Grindr sucks up being harnessed and transmuted into something we as gay men could be TRULY proud of…

  15. Robin Evans 10 Apr 2012, 9:24pm

    I tried Grindr, it never really appealed to me, I’ve never really indulged in the gay scene as a separate scene from the rest…

  16. I think I must be one of the only gay men in the world who does not have a Grindr profile!

    *hands back gay card*

    1. Spanner1960 12 Apr 2012, 2:48pm

      I must be the other.

      1. And me!

  17. …the virtual, bastard son of Gaydar and Cottaging…

    promises the earth and delivers next to nothing…

    “With Grindr you realise how very quickly how little effort you need to put in to get results” my arse!

    …like I said: promised the earth and delivers nothing…

  18. Karl Hayden 27 Apr 2012, 2:19pm

    BE WARNED.. IF YOU SELL OR GIVE YOUR iPhone or iPad TO SOMEONE AND THEY INSTALL GRINDR ON IT, THEY WILL BE ABLE ACCESS YOUR PROFILE.

    Despite telling them about this issue months ago, they still have not resolved a serious problem with the application. I took my partners old iPad after he got a new one and despite clearing it back to factory settings and reinstalling a new version of the app. Grinder’s sign in still reads the serial number of the device and so I end up on my partners profile.

    I told them about this months ago and they have done nothing about it. I sent them all the information they need to correct it and they have not… Grindr support are as about as helpful as a hole in the head. It is the only social network app where this happens. They don’t listen, they don’t act on feedback and they

  19. You don’t need any smart phone apps to run your life.

  20. Spanner1960 10 Apr 2012, 1:25pm

    I wouldn’t touch iTunes with a 90ft red and green striped bargepole.
    Apple software is poison.

  21. itunes and apple are awesome

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