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Study says civil partnerships are ‘treated like parents’ marriages’

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Reader comments

  1. Glad to see such good research coming from my cousin Brian :-)

  2. I fully support equal marriage rights for those who want it but myself and my partner entered into a CP and no way do we wish to be considered married.

    1. Keith Farrell 14 Mar 2012, 10:51am

      I haver no problem with couples who want a civil partnersip, I have one, I would just like to see us as treated equally. I know for a fact that there are some straight couples who do not want a marrage, tghey want a civil partnership, but they are not allowed to. In South Africa you can decide if you are going to have a civil marrage or a civil partnership. why can we not have the same here, give people the right to choose

    2. Spanner1960 14 Mar 2012, 1:53pm

      As many people point out, there is ultimately no difference between the two, but there is in how they are perceived. I cannot see why somebody would wish to be considered at best an ‘oddball’, and at worst ‘another damn faggot’ by being segregated, when hopefully we can all have the same option as everybody else.

      1. Amen!

      2. That may be true in England and Wales, but in Northern Ireland there are differences (Civil partners cannot jointly adopt for instance even when one is the biological parent – only married couples can). We also have the problem were our legislature use the difference to disadvantage gay couples from having the same rights (they use the term married in bills and leave out civil partners to ensure discrimination is enshrined in our system). Having marriage equality will protect gay people from such institutionalised religiously inspired prejudice.

    3. If you don’t want to be married, you must consider it to be different from marriage. You are not alone. Most anti-equal marriage people would agree with you on the difference, but not on your support for others’ desire for equal marriage.

      It is heartening that many people who know people in civil partnerships regard their partnerships as equivalent to marriage, but while the difference remains, there remains a legal source from which prejudice can flow. We must rid our laws from this difference.

  3. Keith Farrell 14 Mar 2012, 10:46am

    good to see this sort of research, I think the point gets missed by a lot of churches, we want equal rights and to refer to ourselves as married. we dont want to take away from their sacrament called ‘matrimony’ which is quite different.
    I get very hurt when I say we are married and I then get corrected by officials and told that we are a civil partnership and it is not a marrage but a contract. well what is a marrage, its a contractperiod. rather like a hire-purchase contact, it is not the deposit which kills you but the installments which never end. We go through all the same things as straight couples do, worry about finance, our homes, council tax and the cost of living

  4. Its great to see that society regard LGBT couples who make a public commitment to each other as having the same level of value as heterosexual couples who marry.

    Its great for those LGBT couples who have (or wish to) established a CP to enjoy that – especially for those for whom this is sufficient for them in their relationship.

    However, CPs are not marriages (that might be why some CP couples are happy with CPs). They do not give the same rights and responsibilities (although there are many similarities).

    It is time to ensure that those LGBT couples who wish to have a civil marriage are able to, have parity of value in law (and society) as with their heterosexual compatriots and do not have a choice which is perceived to be inferior to that heterosexuals have (fewer legal rights and responsibilities).

    The time for equality was long ago, its time now to claim it.

  5. hopefully not like my parents marriage..that was a disaster!

    1. Spanner1960 14 Mar 2012, 1:53pm

      I assume you were the result? ;)

  6. So has the consultation on the implementation of same sex marriage equality begun yet or what?

    1. Well I have just spent 20 mins searching on google, the parliamentary website, home office website and elsewhere and can only find reference to it starting in March 2012 but not a specific launch date. Anyone had an invite to the launch? Anyone have a link to more info?

  7. I have been in a co-habitating relationship for 13 years, but I refuse to have a civil partniships while the option to have a marriage is not available. It is just another way to keep us down and different or unequal.

    However, once the option to have either becomes available, I will chose and option, which would probably be to have a civil partership.

    I rather choose death before dishonour.

    1. Will you chose a CP if it’s not available to hetrosexuals?

  8. Robert in S. Kensington 14 Mar 2012, 1:46pm

    And of course, this will fuel the opposition’s claim that CPs are sufficient and therefore we have our FULL equality.

    I just received a response from Tory MP David Burrowes who claims that same-sex marriage weakens the concept of marriage. i responded by asking him to provide the factual evidence especially since it is legal in 10 countries already. I also asked him if he could look his child in the eye, assuming he ever has a gay child, and tell him or her that they should be disciminated against by being banned from marriage. My other questions were, would he enter into a civil partnership if his girlfriend (now his wife) would have preferred one had they been available to heterosexuals and if not, why not, assuming CPs are equal in his view? I doubt if I’ll get a rational response to that one of course.

    1. “I doubt if I’ll get a rational response to that one of course.”

      if anything he’ll release another soundbite about being targeted by our community

      1. Robert in S. Kensington 14 Mar 2012, 2:27pm

        Of course! They have ways of skirting an issue because they really have no rational reason to oppose it.

    2. Spanner1960 14 Mar 2012, 1:55pm

      That’s actually a very good point – I wonder how many straights that got married in registry offices would mind being ‘downgraded’ to a Civil partnership if, as they are so eager to point out, there is no difference?

      1. Robert in S. Kensington 14 Mar 2012, 2:29pm

        Exactly my point in my question to Burrowes. I wonder if his wife prior to marrying her had preferred a CP had they been available, would he have gone along with it? I doubt it. I can only imagine what his response might be, not that it would be rational.

    3. The counter argument to the notion that they are no different because people treat them so is that, if they’re the same, we might as well consolidate the legislation.

  9. Great article. Great survey. Great comments.
    “And like many heterosexual marriages, their relationships involve negotiating money management and debt, and juggling the demands of work and home life. For the most part they assume monogamous sexual and emotional commitments and are strongly connected to the families they grew up with.”
    Gee! Apparently, we’re just like real people!

  10. My favourite aunt decided we were ‘married’ 10 years before CPs came in; my mother-in-law decided to deal with it by treating me as another son; my father-in-law didn’t seem to hold any view of us at all (even after attending a blessing ceremony) until last year, 21 years after we got together, when he actually called me his son’s ‘partner’. People will vary in their reactions to us all the time. We should still have marriage, of course.

  11. Robert in S. Kensington 14 Mar 2012, 2:31pm

    Stephen Gray, does the actual consultation begin tomorrow as your article states? I was under the impression only a written ministerial statement to Parliament will be presented, not the actual beginning of the consultation and if not, when?

  12. I live in Brisbane Australia, last month our State Government allowed my partner and I to register a civil partnership. We are both in our sixties and been together nearly 40 years. At our age we are more concerned about each of us having the final say over the other’s health care. So are we now each other’s closest next of kin. To put it simply, will a hospital or Doctor take notice of me when I wave my civil partnership certificate or will they take notice of my partner’s brother or sister? Any lawyers out there to answer this for me, or will this have to be tested in a court?

    1. If you want to be certain (and I base this on English law – but there are similarities in Australia/NZ I understand) then writing a letter of intent (a living will) which is witnessed and signed by a solicitor and/or doctor.

      Living Wills and advanced declarations are the only things I consider as a paramedic (other than things such as do not attempt resuscitation orders from other clinicians).

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