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London council urges gay couples to become foster parents

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  1. Oh so now its ok for LGBTs to foster kids? That’s a u-turn and a half, kids’ homes must be full to overflowing if we’re now considered suitable candidates for taking in those children abandoned by their STRAIGHT birth parents.

    1. Jock S. Trap 11 Jun 2011, 8:21am

      Pretty much, yep.

    2. Why do we have to respond petulantly about this?

      Whenever we make progress and win ground in terms of equalisation of how LGBT are treated in society, why do we have to respond with a negative – well its ok now then isn’t it …

      Lets be grateful for the progress and encourage more…

      1. Definitely, 100% agree with Stu. I think this is really positive news. Yes we were shunned in the past and some couples probaly still are today. This however, signals progress.

      2. billy wingarden 15 Jun 2011, 6:28am

        one has to wonder if CMTB is one of hte anything but christians, or a catholic abused as a boy by his church………….

        whose real job is to sow dissention in the ranks of the LGBT community.

        We had an interesting and somewhat related example here in Washington, DC. An ultra right wing newspaper (washington times) had a reasonalbe article re gays.

        the reason they did that was obvious from the blog comments.

        their goal was to provoke the paranoia of the right wing and build hatred ever ever more overflowing.

        Somewhere I ‘ve seen where good old adolph himself used these tricks during the 1939s on his rush to power.

    3. Condescending Meatballheaded Yobbish Behaviour 11 Jun 2011, 11:47pm

      no wonder we never get far with idiots like you cmyb………. comments like this show there is a divide between straight and lgbt people….. get real and f@ck off you straightaphobe

      1. No, it’s because of bltches like you that we have never had any rights. It’s not being straightphobic to point out that they have treated us like criminals for the last thousand years – we’ve only been able to foster for 5 years! Homophobes take away our rights, what exactly does this ‘straighaphobe’ that you’ve invented do? You get real and wake up to the homophobic world you live in.

        1. Eddy

          When women got the right to vote, does history show they complained about how long they had been waiting for the right – no – it shows they celebrated the newly gained equality and voted and encouraged other women to do so too

          When apartheid was dismantled in South Africa was Mandela repugnant and demonstrative about the length of time it took to get to moving towards equality – no, the history books show he celebrated a new birth for all in South Africa

          So why the hell do we as LGBT have to dwell in the past and find the negatives when this is a positive story for developing LGBT equality?

          Yes, there is homophobia – yes, that needs condemning … but this is a time to celebrate the good and encourage those who wish to see equality meaning true equality – not smack down those who have ensured that we have equality in this matter …

          Yes, we have only been able to foster for five years – but we have been able to foster – that battle is won …. now to more …

          1. Jock S. Trap 12 Jun 2011, 12:09pm

            Not being funny Stu but when women got the vote it wasn’t given by area.
            When apartheid was dismantled in South Africa it was as a country.
            I kinda get what your saying but this isn’t a country wide acceptance this is a small area in the country.
            It makes up one of more that are showing the correct way forward but it’s by no means all.
            You say we’re dwelling in the past yet we are still being treated, discriminately over adopt in many areas.
            Although it is perfectly legal for same sex couple to adopt we still are seen as last resort parents, so the negatives are very much there.
            Yes what Lambeth is doing is great, it is progress no-one can deny that but work still has to be done to get this nationwide.

          2. @Jock S Trap

            I fully appreciate that Lambeths approach is different to other local authorities.

            However, some of the comments on this thread have been very much linked to Lambeths actions – complaining that it has taken too long – rather than welcoming progress.

            Also, if we wish to rightly criticize local authorities which are either doing insufficient to progress LGBT equality in this area or are actually putting barriers in the way of equality – then we need to be careful not to make it appear we are criticizing local authorities who are seeking to progress equality. Many of the comments on this thread appear (whether intentioned or not) to criticize Lambeth.

            At no point have I said the battle is over on equality for fostering or adoption for LGBT people. At no point have I said that we should not work harder to establish true equality. We must.

            However, most of the commentary on the threads is negative despite the story itself being positive.

          3. No one is dwelling in the past, just you still going on about CMYB’s comment. Women do still talk about how they have treated in the past in a bid to gain equality. The black community do talk about apartheid in South Africa, I lived there, I know. Are you saying that every repressed minority should just forget their inglorious past? And read Peter Martin’s comment below, you may realise that we don’t have equality. They give us a crumb of acceptance and you think we should celebrate as if we’ve been included in the feast. Wake up. Have you ever watched tropic thunder? You remind me of simple jack.

          4. @Eddy two

            I said at the time that women were given the vote did they complain that it had taken too long, or at the time Apertheid was dismantled did Mandela criticize the length of time it took to occur? No – they celebrated the gains and progress that had been made. Sure, there was reflection on and recognition of the past both before and after these gains had been won – but at the time there was celebration and recognition. It seems to me, all too often there is a mentality in the LGBT communities to emphasize the bad and dismiss the good. Here, was a very good news story of progress that should be celebrated and what is the response – a whitewash of complaining and consternation that progress had not been made earlier. If you read my comments carefully you will see that I am fully aware homophobia exists and very supportive of efforts to prevent and highlight it. This however, is a time to celebrate – Good on Lambeth, and I hope progress can be made in other areas too.

          5. @Eddy Two

            Throw insults at me all you like, they dont change my opinion – which is measured and considered (not simple as you would like to suggest) that you are reacting inappropriately and demotivating people who wish to seek LGBT equality from doing so by failing to allow recognition of progress

          6. Jock S. Trap 13 Jun 2011, 8:01am

            Stu
            “However, some of the comments on this thread have been very much linked to Lambeths actions – complaining that it has taken too long – rather than welcoming progress.”

            Totally agree, I guess.
            We should be praising what is happening in Lambeth and see it as the positive, I agree.
            We do need to reflect on the positives that make our lives more equal, a little cheer, as it were.
            I think maybe people are prehaps more skeptic than negative but yes we should see this for what it is.

          7. Jock S. Trap 13 Jun 2011, 8:11am

            “that women were given the vote did they complain that it had taken too long, or at the time Apertheid was dismantled did Mandela criticize the length of time it took to occur? No”

            Maybe not documented but I’m betting that just like us some did.
            When we finally get full Equality I’m also betting someone will be fighting for something that’ll use the same argument about us and saying No.
            Truth is I suspect some did.
            Lets not forget that only women over 30 got the vote in 2018 until it was equalise in 1928.
            I suspect plenty of women thought that wasn’t good enough.Same goes for Black rights etc.

            Just because it is not documented doesn’t mean it didn’t happen.
            It is too strong in human nature to want more.

          8. @Jock S Trap

            Fair points …
            It is reasonable that this should be a time of celebration and recognising progress but equally it is human nature to want more.
            It is possible, maybe even likely that there may have been some disquiet at the time of women obtaining voting rights – although the reported facts are that the equalisation of voting rights was stridently welcomed by the suffagettes and others. In terms of Mandela – I accept it is possible that in his private moments he reflected that it had taken too long for Apertheid to end but nonetheless in his public comments he was very clear that it was time for a new birth in South Africa.

          9. Stu, I was only joking with the simple jack thing, soz, I’ve got a very dry sense of humour. I enjoy all your posts and would never want to demotivate you. You’re just too nice, if that’s possible. So soz if I offended you. And I am not saying we shouldn’t be happy (as simple jack would say) about what Lambeth have said about fostering. I am not condemning them, I just keep in mind how badly we have been treated by heterosexuals, and still are. That’s all. And I think that’s all the original post that CMYB was saying.

          10. @Eddy two

            Thanks for being a big man and apologising …

            Its sometimes easy to read into comments on message boards like this that arent always intended in the manner you read them – nuances aren’t always clear.

            Thanks for the compliment. I actually think on this issue – we agree on the main themes and issues – it’s our emphasis on how to respond to the issue where we differ.

            I do agree with you that we need to ensure we advance LGBT rights.

            I also enjoy reading your posts (whether I agree with the emphasis or not)

            x

        2. Condescending Meatballheaded Yobbish Behaviour 12 Jun 2011, 12:40pm

          @eddy two brain cells: f@ck off and die you piece of dirt, i wasn’t talking to you anyway you no mark. it’s you who is proven to be the bitter bitch in this scenario with regards to your insidious remarks, therefore go back and crawl under the self loathing stone where you unfortunately live. talk about stupid. and by the way it’s straightaphobe not straighaphobe so get your spelling correct in future. what does a straightaphobe do? look in the mirror you cretin!

          1. is this really necessary?

          2. Touched a nerve there did I Condescending MeatBellend Yobbis Bitch? Stop throwing your toys out of your pram and grow up. Please explain again what a straighaphobe does? I looked in the mirror and couldn’t see one, so I still don’t know. I know homophobic straight people stop us from having equality, imprison us, torture us and kill us throughout the world. But I can’t find any governments or societies where these gay straighaphobics have any power or exist.

        3. n a regular basis.... what are you a 12 Jun 2011, 9:30pm

          no unfortunately in this case you never touched a nerve eddy the eagle…….the only ‘thing’ with a nerve is you,,, so why don’t you get off here and do something productive in your life for once… oh sorry i forgot you are so incapable…. you couldn’t even kill yourself… i come on here about once a week and all i see is your incomprehensible hate filled comments… you should be barred from here as it puts me off and probably others from reading the opinions… you should get out more, oh sorry i forgot you are sectioned!

        4. the only bitch is you eddy two boohoo…. i thought the term ‘gay’ was about enjoying life and encompassing it, unlike you bitter scum who give us all a bad name… i hope you die a horrible death as that is all you seem to spew on here

    4. Clark Downes 13 Jun 2011, 2:39pm

      When ever the prospect of gay adoption comes up with straight people I do enjoy reminding them that “its not gays that put kids in care” – usually gives them something to ponder on.

      1. Usually you are correct, Clark

        From my former work in child protection I am aware of a case where a child was taken into social services care from gay adoptive parents …. fortunately, following the investigation that occurred the parents were exonerated and the child was returned to their adoptive parents.

      2. coz you are a ‘spastiic’ i am only using this horrible term to remonstrate how backward people like you are.. low life’s like you should have been put down at birth….you make my blood boil

      3. bitter c@nt clark downs ………….

  2. “…it particularly needs carers for teenagers, disabled children and those on remand.”
    Jesus Mary Joseph! LGBT couples are now needed in order to reduce the stock of undesirable adoptees with complex behavioural needs. They must think that we have highly developed parenting skills.

    1. Jock S. Trap 11 Jun 2011, 8:21am

      LGBT couples tend to get the so called ‘undesirables’ because the straight people have not only damaged them but refuse to accept them too.
      Which in my eyes means if we’re good enough as a ‘last resort’ then we are more than acceptable to adopt full stop.
      Actually more so.

    2. undesirable adoptees? i think that’s a bit harsh, especially regarding disabled children

      1. Jock S. Trap 12 Jun 2011, 7:01am

        Then you need to look up excuses straight people have used not to adopt certain children.
        It’s by no means what I agree with but I have heard from people who help adults adopt children that some straight couples use the terms ‘undesirable’ and ‘too difficult’ and we’d prefer a normal child’ (whatever that is).
        It seems some people just aren’t happy bring up a life unless it’s designed to fit in with their own ideal and since when has a child been a possession that has to fit in with a lifestyle.
        You either want children or you don’t.
        My comment shows an example of an excuse used by straight couple where adoption agencies know the last resort that will take on such children is the LGBT community.
        It seems we good enough to take the children the straight people not only don’t want but who they themselves have screwed up.
        Yes it’s cruel to those children but at least they will hopefully get a loving commited family life from a same sex couple who are committed to doing all they can.

        1. Jock S. Trap 12 Jun 2011, 7:04am

          My point if we’re good enough for those children the hetero’s screw up and ‘throw out’ then why do people carry on suggesting we shouldn’t be able to adopt full stop.
          Clearly we are caring and loving enough to give a home, we have clearly proved our ‘worth’.

          Yes what Lambeth are doing is certainly positive but we still have areas that discriminate so we must not be complacent.

          1. No wonder we never seem to get far with your attitude and outlandish comments. Please start living in the real world and remember it’s not all about ‘us’ all of the time. There are many people who adopt disabled children and those who work with them in the education system and now whether these individuals/couples are lgbt or straight this has no relevance within your argument.

          2. Jock S. Trap 12 Jun 2011, 1:35pm

            “No wonder we never seem to get far”
            Yeah that must be it.
            Think thats where we have the problem thomasc, I am living in the real world, know the people who do the adoptions, and indeed those that foster and adopt. Difference is I have heard the facts.
            Trouble is what world do you live in?

            I never said people don’t adopt disabled children, where exactly have I, repeat ‘I’ said any different.
            I’m telling you what ‘I’ have been told by people who do adoptions and hear the discriminating excuses they hear.
            No-where have ‘I’ said people don’t adopt disabled child.
            If you want to pretend everything is fine and dandy then I guess thats where we look to why we don’t progress.
            Living in the real world means dealing with the difficult stuff too you know not just the nice, away with the fairies attitude.

          3. Jock S. Trap 12 Jun 2011, 1:43pm

            In any case why when someone suggest ‘undesireables’ do you immediately jump to disabled?
            I have never heard of disabled children being refused.
            I’m talking about people’s attitude to children from trouble backgrounds, that have grown understandably defensive and may get into trouble with the law.

            Considering when I have said ‘undesirables’ I have been quoting what I have been told about aggressive children.
            Why do YOU immediately assume we’re talking about disabled children?

            Maybe the right thing to do would have been to agree that ‘undesireables’ is a horrible word and actually asked what was meant by it before jumping to your conclusions.

            I’m trying to reflect what my friends have heard and this term that is used by some straight couples. It is horrible but it is sadly reality I’m afraid and has nothing to do with why we never get far.
            Actually that comment makes no sense in this case anyway..

          4. points taken jock

  3. Jock S. Trap 11 Jun 2011, 8:19am

    Good for Lambeth.
    Clearly at last we are seeing common sense in the best interest of the child not the bigotted adults.

    1. Yes, but is it common sense, or are they just desperate to offload these poor kids who nobody else wants so they decide the gays will do after all? You really can’t help wondering.

      1. you poor paranoiac imbecile…. no wonder we are not getting equal rights…….. go back to school and get some real education your fool

        1. WE are not getting equal rights? I’m not part of any ‘we’ that can’t even spell nitwit and calls me names for making a perfectly valid point.

          1. piss off thicko

        2. Jock S. Trap 13 Jun 2011, 8:21am

          Sorry nitwit but I don’t see the need.
          This is a debate page, for debate of which Beth is entitled to her opinion.
          They are very valid ones and she doesn’t deserve to be bullied for it.
          If you don’t like the opinion by all means question it but your comment just seems unnecessary.

          1. how do you know she is a she?

      2. Jock S. Trap 13 Jun 2011, 8:19am

        I think that is part of the reason some come across negative about this Beth.
        The skeptics amongst us and while I do see the positive in this I do also see your point and partly agree with it too.
        At the end of the day though even if it was that we can’t go backwards with this.
        We clearly do make good parents and this will reflect in the long term.
        Maybe if this is what it takes for people to open their eyes and see that same sex couples do a great job being parents to, it’ll go a long way in acceptance.

  4. You all have such massive chips on your shoulders. how can interpret this story as negative to gays?? there encouraging gay parents to foster and adopt, not everyone is out to get you!

    1. Yeah encouraging gay couples to foster NOW after years of relentlessly denying LGBT couples that opportunity.

      1. Jock S. Trap 11 Jun 2011, 12:55pm

        and because they have had the experience of straight couple not wanting these children.
        This positive Now after so much negative but it seems as usual when it suits.

      2. @CMYB

        But this story should not be about immersing ourselves in the past – that has happened and can’t be changed, Lambeth are changing – don’t slap them in the face and say well you didn’t want us before and you can’t have us now then (which is how your attitude sounds) … Lets embrace the change, welcome it and seek more in the future … Stagnating and obsessing about the past does not improve things for individuals or the LGBT communities together

        1. No one is stagnating or obsessing in the past IMO, that’s your view of someone else’s comment. They are just stating what has happened. Do you think black rights comes from not talking about slavery or apartheid – do black people never mention that anymore? Do you think the Jewish state came about by not talking about the holocaust – do Jewish people not talk about the holocaust anymore? It sounds like you want to everyone to just smile and forget the past. Not a good idea.

          1. No I am not wanting anyone to forget the past … It is by learning from the past that we move on and grow …

            However, I do think that by immediately responding to positive and good news in terms of LGBT rights progress with a reposte of “why couldnt we have had this earlier – it should have happened earlier” etc etc that defeats the positivity of the gains made and both demotivates those who have worked to make those gains and fails to recognise the progress made

          2. Jock S. Trap 12 Jun 2011, 7:13am

            Indeed this isn’t just about the past but what is still happening in the present.
            What Lambeth is doing is excellent but it still one area out of many that still discriminate against us.
            I think people have the right to be cautious about this even though yes it is a positive thing.
            For example if a same sex couple are deemed to have the best record/home/stability at looking after a child will they be offered a child first if there are 10 man/woman couples who are considered the same of less that than the same sex couple?
            My point is will they be offered fairly just like any couple or will same sex couple be welcomed but less desirable?
            We do have a right to look carefully at this.

          3. @Jock S Trap

            My point relates to my knowledge of another local authority which has also been positive in trying to ensure equity and fairness to both potential foster parents or those seeking to adopt and particularly to the children/young people concerned. This fairness acknowledges gender and orientation differences in the make up of some of the parenting scenarios but tries to ensure that on suitability selection of parents that orientation is not a criteria, although where particular needs exist with a young person this may be taken into consideration.
            This has been developed by a mix of local authority and voluntary groups, including individuals who are members of the LGBT communities themselves.
            It is highly appropriate work that improves LGBT equality and to ridicule and undermine such progress with negative comments demotivates them and others to engage in future change and service development.

          4. Jock S. Trap 12 Jun 2011, 1:45pm

            And I do totally agree Stu it is positive but as much as I hate using this term to make my point, (I hope you get my meaning) this is winning a battle not the war.
            It is very positive and I hope many other areas follow suit.

          5. @Jock S Trap

            I fully agree this is a battle won – and there will be more battles to win (on this and other issues) …

            However, sometimes it is important (particularly for those who have either campaigned to reach a success or those who have negotiated with them) to motivate by congratulating progress rather than stagnating further progress by demotivating these people who see their work undermined and minimalised.

          6. Jock S. Trap 13 Jun 2011, 8:25am

            Stu
            I think Beth earlier put it right in why people are skeptic about this.
            It is a positive thing but I think some people question the motive.
            While I must admit I do also I think it is important to realise that regardless of the motive out of this comes some good, even more so for long term.

          7. @Jock S Trap

            I understand the being skeptical about many issues including this. However, my concern is that a knee jerk reaction to positive news in LGBT rights progress demotivates those who have achieved this from doing the same again with either different rights or a different area and is self defeating for the LGBT communities.

          8. Jock S. Trap 13 Jun 2011, 10:58am

            Stu.
            I agree.

            I think the problem with the motive side is that many times a same sex couple will be given the hardest of cases to foster, clearly successfully I add and still instead of people seeing this and thinking you know “Wow, if they can take care of kids like that why can’t they adopt/foster like any other” we still have people who make excuses to why we shouldn’t, even with all the evidence.

            I must admit my first reaction was this is good but my second was oh having problems are they?
            Unfair, maybe but whereas this is positive I repeat what I said earlier:-
            “if a same sex couple are deemed to have the best record/home/stability at looking after a child will they be offered a child first if there are 10 man/woman couples who are considered the same of less that than the same sex couple?”
            I guess this is what makes me a bit skeptical.
            After reading Peter Martins comment that slightly increased that in me.

          9. Jock S. Trap 13 Jun 2011, 11:01am


            I feel that maybe we have this because suddenly their a problem with with certain children and now we maybe able to help, a last chance as it were for these kids.

            However, I will say even if it was that then as I said also before only good can come from it in the long term, so long as it isn’t that when the problems over so is this piece of Equality.

            It’ll be worth keeping an eye on and definitely interested in hearing how Peter and his Partner get their issue over this resolved.

          10. @Jock S Trap

            Again, fair points …

            I agree it will be interesting (if possible) to find out what happens with Peter and his partner in relation to this – I hope that the right decision is made.

            I would point out that some of those people making the decisions to encourage fostering from LGBT parents may be LGBT people themselves and thus it is not always a “them and us” battle.

            I do agree that there are grounds for skepticism but that this should be carefully examined before rushing to conclusions. My approach would be to cautiously welcome the progress and hammer down hard if it is not found to be the transparent fair equal system that is presented (bearing in mind there may be rare failures in any human system).

    2. Who said the story was negative to gay guys? I thought the above was pointing out that straight people have denied our right to exist for so long, let alone have a kid, and now they want us to look after their unwanted kids that they have made such a bad job of bringing up or abandoned And you’re right not everyone is out to get the us, just the majority of people given half the chance. Or do you think homophobia doesn’t exist? Duh. That being said, I didn’t know we could foster, as we’ve only been able to for 5 years. Me and my fella might do it. The poor kids that have been neglected by the straights need a home.

      1. I personally didnt say the story was negative – but I do think we jump the victim mentality too often when there is some progress in LGBT rights – yes, it should have come earlier – can we turn the clock back and change it, no …. lets accept the progress and seek more … rather than bitch about an issue that is positive for LGBT people … Is there homophobia – hell yes, have I experienced it – unfortunately … Do I seek to undermine positive progress for LGBT people by criticizing it – not if I can possibly avoid it …

      2. “The poor kids that have been neglected by the straights need a home.”

        If that is your attitude you should no more be allowed to foster children than Eunice and Owen Johns.

        1. Don’t compare me to homophobic bigoted christians, idiot. But please tell me why should I not be allowed to foster for pointing out that the poor kids that need a home have been neglected and abandoned by the heterosexuals that have only just, 6 years ago said we are okay to now look their abandoned and neglected children? I think I’d make a bloody brilliant foster parent ta very much, they’d love living with us.

        2. Er Joss. who the fcuk neglected these kids so then? The cabbage patch from whence they sprung or that stork that’s been delivering them to maternity units up and down the country?

        3. Jock S. Trap 12 Jun 2011, 7:20am

          Joss
          So some of those children… if they have been neglected by their parent(s) who happen to be straight then by who?
          When a lot of same sex couple are used to foster as a last resort sadly then we are good enough.
          It may be an unfortunate phrase but sadly an important one to make people see that we can and should be able to adopt Just like anybody else.
          There are too many children in need of a loving, committed family home and too many people still discriminating against us who forget who, where and why these children need the committed home in the first place.

      3. To gay guys? Ahem – gay people. You really do have delusions of your own grandeur ‘eddy’ the whatever. Go and boil your head please. In fact no please go and do your self in. Or why don’t you start taking your medication again and maybe you will become a better individual!

        1. Just use the same name para meatball n regular whoever are? And stop telling people to kill themselves. That’s just weird.

          1. ok eddy

      4. what a tit you are… i hope you haven’t or won’t ever get anywhere near children or even god forbid adopting them

    3. coz the idiots who are always commenting on here think they have been ‘persecuted’ all of their lives and are so bitter and twisted…… ah diddums…… well we all have been persecuted in some way or form but don’t ‘harp’ om ffs… at the end of the day there are people worse off than yourselves….. hell no you are all obviously beyond repair!

  5. Brian Souter – the homophobic Scottish business man who ran the hateful Keep The Clause Campaign has been knighted in today’s birthday honours. Please sign the petition to register your disgust at this. http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/notosoutersknighthood/

    1. Has this been reported on PInkNews Rossco?

      1. Not yet. I’ve emailed them twice about it but so far no reply. We now have 1,300 signatures to the petition!

        1. Jock S. Trap 12 Jun 2011, 7:23am

          I’ll sign it but it is unlikely a knighthood will be withdrawn.

          1. Have also signed it but other than creating a news story, am not sure what the benefit will be as I too think it is unlikely a knighthood will be withdrawn

  6. Good on Lambeth, but I think another elephant in the room needs to be addressed. I think many sex-same couples (but especially male couples) are reluctant to foster, or indeed parent on any basis, because of persisting suspicion and hostility towards them from surrounding society because of die-hard homophobic ideas about them being a threat to children. What to do? It is a deeply entrenched attitude and likely to last for a long time yet. Would increasing numbers of same-sex couples parenting weaken it through familiarity? Chicken and egg? How to spare the families concerned grief in the meantime? I think it takes a lot of courage to do it.

    1. Jock S. Trap 11 Jun 2011, 3:14pm

      I think you make a good point about why many same sex couples are reluctant to foster.
      At least times are changing and this act by Lambeth goes some way to seeking encouragement.

    2. Jock S. Trap 11 Jun 2011, 3:15pm

      I think you make a good point about why many same sex couples are reluctant to foster.
      At least times are changing and this act by Lambeth goes some way to seeking encouragement.
      Clearly the more that foster the better things will become.
      Of course we will always face those bigots but this is why it is important to put ourselves out there and proof these people different, or at least the people ‘they’ are trying to convince.

      1. I do think there is another reason why same sex couples can be reluctant to foster/adopt and this relates to a perception of the potential for bullying etc for the child as a result of having same sex parents/guardians

        That again requires a culture change but I welcome Lambeth in being progressive and encouraging more same sex partners to actively consider fostering etc.

        1. Jock S. Trap 11 Jun 2011, 3:57pm

          Rightly so but nothing will change unless we push through and stand up to the cause.
          To many councils use Same sex couples as a last resort but that in itself is a positive that many don’t want to see, in that if we are good enough for the difficult cases then we are as God damn sure good enough for all adoption cases.

          1. Sometimes though we push against the wrong organisations …

            We should be pushing those offensive organisations that refuse to engage with same sex couples for fostering and adoption and exposing them – not ridiculing those who are trying to be progressive and honest

        2. Jock S. Trap 12 Jun 2011, 7:25am

          Don’t think anybodies is doing that Stu.
          I think people have a right to be pleased but cautious about this if thats how they feel.
          It doesn’t mean they are being negative just “looking for the small print”.
          I don’t think anyone can blame people for that.

  7. Now if the antigay nutters are so pro-family, then they’d surely agree that allowing us to marry would be an even better environment in which to raise children having two loving, legally married parents. I jest!

  8. Just a thought, can the natural parents refuse to let a gay couple foster?

    1. what a stupid comment, there is no such jurisdiction in most of these matters regarding the biological father/mother…… i think you need to get out more BETH! stop watching the soaps! thick or what???

      1. who the hell are you with your nasty minded insults to people everywhere in this comment page? It was a valid question unlike your puerile reply.

        1. Jock S. Trap 13 Jun 2011, 8:31am

          Beth
          Try to ignore, sadly we do get the odd troll here who just can’t control or help themselves.

        2. erm were you born yesterday? no sorry it must have been the day before!

          1. oh dear. not another troll.

          2. yes another troll you f@ckwit!

        3. erm ”i am unable to look after my own offspring but i am able to cite who can??” are you for real beth? there are night classes for people like you….. you can always get eddy two to enroll too! doh!

          1. Jock S. Trap 14 Jun 2011, 3:16pm

            Why does this site seem to attract these idiot Troll like flies round sh!t?

    2. Jock S. Trap 13 Jun 2011, 8:36am

      Interesting question.
      I don’t think so after all once the child is in care it then becomes the Social Services responsibility.
      There was a hoo-haa last year I think that the oh so pleasant (not) Daily Mail picked up on about a couple who children were given to same sex foster parents and how the parents didn’t approve.
      The parents claims the children should have gone to the grandparents but Social Services didn’t think they were suitable.
      Again it probably depends on areas but I would think that Social Services are placing in the childs interests until such time the parents can have full access again.

      1. That was what made me think of it. I thought there had been a case of some sort but i didn’t know the details. The troll deflected the point completely.

        1. god you are both as stupid as each other…. i hope you both never get the chance to adopt as you are clearly thick as the proverbial

          1. Jock S. Trap 14 Jun 2011, 3:18pm

            No need I already have my son, ta bitchy.

  9. PETER MARTIN 12 Jun 2011, 6:25pm

    I am surprised to read that Lambeth are calling for gay couples to become foster parents. My same-sex partner and I spent eighteen months being assessed and sent on training courses by Lambeth. Then last Christmas we were called-in to be told that our application to be foster parents was being terminated immediately and without discussion because we were not heterosexual. Human Rights group Liberty believe both our Human Rights and the Equality Act may have been breached by this action. It has now taken us six months just to get agreement from Lambeth to take our complaint to level two of their complaints procedure. In light of our experience, do you think it right that Lambeth should be making this appeal when most gay couples will not be accepted by them ?

    1. Interesting comment Peter. I hope those above who think we should throw a street party because Lambeth have asked for more gay couples to foster will read your experience and realise they are living in a dream world.
      Perhaps Lambeth have released this request because of your complaint? Your action against their homophobia may have shaken things up there.So good for you and your partner for first trying to foster, then going ahead with your complaint when they refused you.

      1. @Eddy two

        I will not allow one case to change how I view an organisation having investigated complaints against public sector organisations – I know that one piece of malpractice is not evidence of a corrupt system.

        I do think the comments Peter makes are interesting and it sounds as though he has significant grounds for complaint and review. I hope Lambeth deal with the complaint expeditiously and come to an appropriate conclusion and change their decision – and where appropriate seek change/discipline.

        You may be right Eddy that the complaint has caused someone/some people to sit up and take notice at Lambeth – it may be coincidental, I am sure we will never know. What I do know is that we need to do two things, act where there is inappropriate discriminatory and homophobic actions by any individual or organisation – but ALSO congratulate and encourage where practices and attitudes are improved and not cloud the two.

      2. FOAD which means f@ck off and die you amoeba… i am sure you must have had a terrible childhood and have been bullied throughout your school years and really should feel sorry for you and then i take a step back and think it is you with all of the problems, as roxy music said – dance away the heartache….. i thought that the whole point of the whole gay thing was about being positive about who we are not being a sour pussed old freak like you EDDY TWO

        1. right, i see, this is a troll picking on people randomly and insulting them for no reason.

          1. Commander Thor 13 Jun 2011, 8:14am

            I have been reporting it for inciting suicide in every post.

          2. picking on deluded dimwits like yourself and eddy two, whose comments are so further from the truth or even reality – you have no idea have you? and as for inciting suicide commander? WHATEVER!

          3. eek, parabola, take some time out. I’m surprised you’ve not asked me to go and kill myself again. and I ‘aint old.

          4. oh you are compared to my age mother theresa

    2. Jock S. Trap 13 Jun 2011, 8:40am

      Peter Martin
      I was wondering about this because if I’m not mistaken Lambeth has a high number of Christians and not necessarily the good ones which is why this decision is more positive.
      But I have to wonder at the battle to get this positive thing through and at what cost?
      (I don’t mean cost as in financially).

    3. The fact that this happened suddenly after a long preparation period suggests someone getting away with sticking a spoke in the wheel, possibly through undue pressure in high places, personal connections, blackmail or whatever. I doubt if they have a leg to stand on when push comes to shove. Good luck and please stick at your complaint, regardless of blatant delaying tactics.

      1. @Riondo

        If I was being generous then I would say the failures that Peter reports could be due to the actions of a lone worker who is homophobic and that this may have been supported (without any necessary malice) by others wishing to (wrongly) protect their colleague, subordinate or whatever ..

        I hope it is not more sinister …

        I do think though that the tenure of Lambeths public proclamations about fostering with LGBT parents is positive – and that this complaint must be both dealt with but recognised as an isolated incident (until/unless proven otherwise)

  10. I was told a few yrs ago by a social worker that gay couples tended to be given the “undesirable” children first ie disabled etc becuase the straights were always given the “choice” chldren. It sounds nasty but I rally hope that this is no longer the case and we are now treated equally when it comes to “choice” or :”undesirable” children. There’s a phrase in this article which worries me..

    1. I would hope that fostering/adoptive parents would be matched to potential children on the basis of a variety of factors and that would include needs of the child, resiliance and experience of the parents and a whole host of other social factors that could impact on a particular child foster placement etc

  11. Ooer missus 13 Jun 2011, 11:32am

    Good to see that there is encouragement to loving, giving people who happen to be gay, to make a difference to young people in need of a stable home.

    1. Absolutely. I wish every success to the LGBT individuals and couples who wish to support children either by fostering or adoption (in Lambeth or elsewhere). I am sure there will be good times and bad times, but I am sure that the vast majority of children will benefit from loving, caring and supportive parenting

  12. Dan Filson 15 Jun 2011, 2:10am

    Lambeth seeking LGBT adoptive or foster parents is hardly news. Bromley, Barnet or Havering doing so might be news. One wonders whether outer London boroughs are awash with foster parents or whether no children there ever need them. And what of the counties and boroughs outside London?

    I know a lot of care goes into trying to ensure adoptive parents are perfect, which is one reason why children take so long to be adopted, However there is a reluctance to be a foster parent for reasons other than the cash – people cannot bear caring for a child only to have to hand the child back. We need more foster parents of all kinds but better examination of their suitability also.

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