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Lesbian-only guesthouse now allows men

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  1. If it’s lesbian only, does that mean bisexual women aren’t allowed? If so, I feel discriminated against.

    I understand the need for single-gender spaces but think that the need is often exaggerated.

  2. Discrimination works both ways. Remember the B&B in this country that tried to ban gay guests? How is lesbian only any different?

    If you want to market yourself as a Gay or Lesbian friendly venue, fine, great even. But doing it by discrimination is wrong.

    I only wish that were the reason, rather than money.

  3. de Villiers 29 Nov 2010, 6:08pm

    > If so, I feel discriminated against.

    What – even if you have yourself suffered no detriment?

  4. only women? what a queef…

  5. Bishop Ioan 29 Nov 2010, 11:54pm

    How many lesbian only spaces are there? Do women demand the right to invade male-only guesthouses in Key West. The need is exaggerated because there is not much lesbian only space and so far as I know Pearl’s was the only lesbian only resort in Key West.

  6. It’s sad that they couldn’t keep to their original proposition, but I’d rather see a place like that go co-ed and still be lesbian friendly than see it go under trying to keep to the original ideal…

    Maybe now that their predicament has been made clear, the lesbian community can vote with their dollars by spending their money there and help them back to being lesbian only. In the mean-time, having Pearl’s survive this way is better than nothing!

    I wish them all the best!

  7. Bishop Ioan 30 Nov 2010, 1:02am

    Yeah, like my spouse and I are going to want to feel able to be normally affectionate with each other in a mixed situation. I guess that lesbian-only space was a nice dream. The men win again and are allowed to invade.

  8. David in Indy 30 Nov 2010, 1:24am

    Once they get their books back in the black they won’t want us there anymore. :-\

  9. stan James 30 Nov 2010, 4:40am

    This kind of reminds me of the debate over a gay only high school in Chicago USA. Idea was to stop harrassment.

    MY comment there was they need a bullies only high school. Well known as a place for incorrigible bullies. Going there woudl be a kiss of death to any carreer other then manual labor.

    Lets integrate the place and keep it integrated. I really wish it didn’t matter if people were gay or not.
    YOu hear all these horror comments about people seeing a couple guys kiss. Paranoia created by their churches who worship the god of hatred.

    It only took me a couple times to get comfortable kissing a gay friend on the cheek or neck. even infront of my wife.

    No we don’t do tongue swapping , but last friday – the day my wife calls “gay gay and more gay tonight”?

    I just stood there in the gay bar while a couple of young gay guys swapped tongues for what had to be 10 minutes.

    Doesnt bother me one bit, should nt bother anyone else.

    Remember – “Pervert” is the word which describes str8 people who have an obsession with watching gay people in their bedroom.

  10. The issue is about low occupancy.

    Until the politicians and business owners of Key West turn this increasingly trashy town around, fewer and fewer people will visit.

  11. stan James – HUH?! I do not understand your comment?

  12. Jock S. Trap 30 Nov 2010, 9:25am

    The question is are the men really wanted by the owners and how will that reflect on the men that do stay?

    Unwanted guess do sense it!

  13. Jock S. Trap 30 Nov 2010, 9:27am

    Sorry that was ment to be guests not guess!

  14. “Yeah, like my spouse and I are going to want to feel able to be normally affectionate with each other in a mixed situation. I guess that lesbian-only space was a nice dream. The men win again and are allowed to invade.” – Bishop loan

    I’m not sure I get it. Are you saying that as a couple that yourself and your partner feel uncomfortable in expressing your fondness for one another in front of men? Why?

    I agree. As a gay man I used to have lots of lesbian and bi-female friends. I did after a while begin to feel rather ostracised..because I “didn’t understand”.

    It just strikes me that as the LGBt community we should all be looking out for one another and I know that gay men have issues with lesbians-bi-women and vice versa but further creating a space to ostracise either of us is wrong.

  15. Also, it’s not about the “men winning again”. It’s about this business having to make sacrifices (like most others in this difficult time) in order to keep afloat.

    Truly, I understand that there are a lot less female spaces out there for you gay and bi-girls but then perhaps instead of taking it out on us men (for just being there) get together and create more for yourselves. I’m sure as gay men – we might even lend you a helping hand. After all, we should be there for one another.

  16. I wouldn’t want to stay in that dyke hole anyway! You only want us gay men now your precious dykes have jumped a sinking ship. Slap it up ye!

  17. My computers won’t load the comments section correctly and I get part of the text obliterated by the photograph. Neither can I get the option of going ‘back’ etc. Anmy suggestions for rectifying?

  18. martyn notman 30 Nov 2010, 2:41pm

    i had an experience at a gay men only guest house where three days from the end of the stay a lesbian couple (friends of owners) came to stay..and spent most of next three days taking the piss out of us and laughing at us round pool. Its not only straight people who can be cruel..everyone needs a space and its a shame the lesbian community has lost this one..

  19. Yes, martyn notman that sounds about right. Dykes are nothing more than nasty pieces of work. You know what dykes are? Homophobic heterosexual men trapped inside a women’s body. I laugh at them. They are all for women’s rights and love everything about women yet they have no issue cutting their hair short, wearing shirts and boots LOOKING LIKE MEN!!!!!! They are pathetic.

  20. I’m sorry, it’s still discrimination to have a lesbian only guest house.

    Lesbian couples saying they “don’t feel comfortable expressing their love around men” is a kin to homophobes saying they’re uncomfortable around gay people…

    Segregation is never the answer, even if it is self segregation.

  21. de Villiers 30 Nov 2010, 8:11pm

    > Segregation is never the answer, even if it is self segregation.

    Surely it is freedom of association? Christians go to church. Jews to synagogue. Straight men bond together over rugby. The black police association caters to a specific constituency.

    Perhaps it is less about discrimination and more about trying to carve a quiet corner that is free from domination.

  22. Mihangel apYrs 30 Nov 2010, 9:07pm

    de Villiers et al:

    I’ve noticed some lesbians are extremely offended when men carve out space or ask for men-only events.

    I’ve also found that many lesbians are perfectly happy sharing their space and their friendship.

    I avoid the first sort

  23. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. Men are not supposed to have to open their spaces but lesbians, well, who cares if they lose another space. We don’t have a ton of money in the community to set up our spaces. But that’s just another reason to walk on into lesbian space.

    I wouldn’t go to an all male place because my spouse and I simply do not wish to be the object of ridicule. We get enough hassle and ridicule because we are an age-disparate couple. Lesbians tend to be less judgemental on that score.

  24. Mihangel apYrs 1 Dec 2010, 7:16am

    the thrust of this article is that the “lesbian” only guesthouse wasn’t able to earn enough now to keep it exclusive and needed male cash (and unfortunately guests) to keep it going.

    So how is it men’s fault that women weren’t supporting it? Do people really think that men will insist on going there just because it was once female-only?

    Bear in mind, other, male-oriented, establishments are also taking a hit: if men patronise these in place of this one, then this one will totally fail and there will be nowhere for lesbians.

  25. I hope all lesbian places are shut up. Queers – let’s boycott this ****hole. Our money wasn’t good enough for them to begin with; now they’re struggling they want our money but yet at the same time blaming it on us!!! When in actual fact it was the dirty dykes that weren’t supporting their lesbian corner to begin with.

  26. Kay from New Zealand 1 Dec 2010, 10:17am

    Events like the Michigan Women’s Music Festival are popular in part because they enable women to step out of clothes and anxiety which some women have around men. Lots of women especially lesbians have survived violence at the hands of men. Gay men may be less likely to do this but male voices early in the morning or late at night may still break the mood for a woman who wants to relax in women only space. Affirmative action for a group that faces discrimination is usually allowed in law. When women are paid as much as men, and have equal opportunities and are safe from violence from men then there may be less need for women only spaces. Some lesbians feel more comfortable in lesbian only space. In my view, if “lesbian only” doesn’t pay enough and they can’t get wealthy sponsors then maybe they should try Women Only first, but I guess they know their regular customers and what works for them.

  27. Kay, you’re confusing sexuality with feminism. Not all lesbians are feminists and not all feminists are lesbians. They are not interchangable terms.

    Let’s also not assume that many lesbians suffer violence at the hands of straight men. Lesbians can also suffer hate crime at the hands of anyone (we’re not privy to the attackers sexuality). They also have to deal with domestic violcence in their own partnerships (I’m sure women hit women too). Men are not evil beings who perpetuate violence against women indiscrimantely and your argument only serves to create a division where there should be unity.

    Daz, I actually think it’s you that’s a nasty piece of work. You clearly have issues with lesbians and I can see why if people like you frequent a bar then lesbians certainly aren’t going to feel comfortable.

    Also, as has been said before it’s lesbians that have decided not to give their continued patronage to this business. That is an issue that lesbians have to account for. Going all ‘man-hater’ and using gay men as scapegoats is not on and quite frankly you should be ashamed of yourself.

    You have numpties like Daz posting to this board but then a couple of you girls aren’t really that much better, just more elequent.

  28. de Villiers 1 Dec 2010, 7:17pm

    > I’ve noticed some lesbians are extremely offended when men carve out space or ask for men-only events. I’ve also found that many lesbians are perfectly happy sharing their space and their friendship. I avoid the first sort

    I do not necessarily disagree. I merely consider that to avoid majoritarian domination through private space and freedom of association is different from majoritarian discrimination against minority groups.

  29. I think daz is a fake

    maybe it is a straight man/woman or a lesbian herself.

  30. No Danny, you’re the numpty. Go forth and lick out the dykes. I believe the word you were searching for was eloquent, not elequent. FAIL.

  31. so YOU ARE a fake!!!

    muahuahuahahaha… ;) ;) ;)

    i bet you DAZ are a lesbian or a straight man. wanna bet?

  32. c.j. I am a GAY MAN and PROUD. I do not need to prove anything to you.

  33. so why do you hate lesbians? I am gay to but I don not generalize on all lesbians. Some of them are assholes… but the same thing could be said about anyone. I can’t believe that all lesbians are man-hating butchy dykes. Some of them are, and I feel very sorry for them, it must be terrile living your only life hating all the time, but I know some lesbians who are nice. and feminine. don’t you think so? let me know

  34. c.j. – it’s a known fact that feminine lesbians prefer the butch dyke. It’s because they are manly but at the same time have a fat camel toe. They are just as bad as the butch dykes as they are supporters/lovers of them. Everything about the butch is hypocritical – they even need penis shaped items to “get off” with eachother! As I said before – they are all men hating yet have no problem acting/looking/sounding like a man. Pathetic.

  35. Whether Daz is a gay man or not, and whether he is a troll or not, he is precisely the reason why lesbian space still needs to exist.

  36. I know many wonderful, supportive gay men, but men like Daz is a reason that lesbians need lesbian only space. I have never heard such nastiness and vitriol from a gay man, even those who do not particularly care for women.

  37. i think there are a lot of angry people here, both gay and lesbian. maybe it’s becose there is a lot of homophobia which affects both gays and lesbians, it’ like torturings two dogs, you will soon see them fighting against each other, but not becose one did anything wrong to yhe other, the real crime comes from somwhere else. I’m just thinking…

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