I watched this interview over the weekend and it was really touching, even a cynical old git like me felt sorry for poor Marie and her whole family who are still mourning the loss of Michael.
I’ve seen people on other websites slagging Marie off and saying that she’s lying about her son, but I don’t get why she’d lie about him being gay when she has a gay daughter and is open about her. I’m inclined to believe her, she has nothing to gain from lying.
Kaz , indeed. I haven’t heard about these rumours until now. But I have to agree with you 100%. Marie has no reason to cover up a gay son when she has an accepted gay daughter. Nonsense journalism. So sorry for your loss Marie.
Sorry, Mormons are great about denial when it comes to GLBTs. I have made it a point not to believe them because I have yet to meet a Moron who doesn’t lie.
I know nothing about the son. and didnt know about the gay and accepted daughter.
But homophobia and hatred and the closet have a 1000 faces. Yes , all that follows is my conjecture and my heart goes out to this woman but…..
Could the son still have had all kinds of shame and guilt over his being gay, and being unable to talk about it. And these feelings eat at you until you cant take them any more, and suicide is the only way out?
I;ve also learned that when kids come out of the closet, parents go into the closet of shame and fear. Maybe one gay child was acceptable, but the shame and fear of having a second was too much for her to bear. So in many subtle ways, she might have signaled non-acceptance without realizing it.
Third – its been obvious that being a gay male, especially a fem like gay male, is much worse then being a lesbian. This comes from way back in human history, when women were the incubators of the children, and men were the macho types who, even today in some african societies< have to prove their maleness by eg killing a lion, & of course having endless sex with the girls.
So the son's sense of self worth could have been destroyed, he didn't understand it, and hid it from Mom (? re the father's situatioN). And the rest is sick history.
All this comes from the 18 years I've spent trying to understand the tragedy and horrors of homophobia vs the so many wonderful gay people I've met over the last decade.
And only in the last couple weeks I came across 20 year old notes about a cousins adopted boy, whom I only remember as a toddler. He apparently was always depressed, never wanted to go to college (we are almost all grads in the extended family), took a blue collar job -honest work as a printer, and then a at age 30 or so committed suicide. the key item – Apparently he didn't want to date girls. BTW, the cousin died of cancer 10 yrs ago, his wife remarried and has lost contact with us.
Everything points to Marie's son being gay. I hope I haven't offended anyone here, yes I'm speculating, but what I tell you is based on personally known facts.
And I've found so much of homophobia and the depths to how it poisons our society and manifests itself in such subtle ways is not even understood by many of my gay friends.
But perhaps in some way what ive written here will help someone else help prevent a suicide. time well spent.
BTw I almost forget how I could have been a suicide. I was a total nerd who totally failed at sports. I only had a few friends growing up, mostly like me. And I was skinny as a rail – try 67; and 110# at age 16. And all through school I was bullied.
Finally we moved as I entered high school. No one knew my past history. yet over time the "me" came out, and the other kids subtly made fun of me. My last couple weeks before graduation I almost had to beg to sit with other guys at lunch.
Then college, and I pledged the same frat that my Dad had belonged to decades before. Despite all I did, in the end I was going to commit suicide because a couple of the "brothers' were going to blackball me (one no and your out). And what was it about – who would I have to sit and have lunch with each day, besides myself.
Fortunately my Dad got to the frat advisor, and I got in. And never felt accepted. But I made one really good friend outside the frat – who wanted to help me re girls – he was spending half his life screwing girls anyway.
And over time I drifted out of the fraternity, lost interest etc, and all was fine.
And what was the suicide idea really about – a lousy way to protest and get even and deliver a guilt trip to the bullies.
And why didn't I commit suicide – because I knew my parents would have been devastated. Think about what might have happened to me if I had been gay and knew my parents would throw me out of hte house.
Comments – Stephen_1553email@example.com
BTW, I have lots of time as a 71 yr old retiree. And I met a super decent gay man the other day at a group meeting that helps support gay people. He told me he volunteers for the Trevor Project – a US hotline – help line for troubled mostly gay teens who are suicidal. As I'm writing this, I'm going to contact them tomorrow. I'm not a psychologist, just a techy, but maybe I can help in some way. Dont know, will try.
Do you not get it? She would not lie about if he was gay, cause she has a gay daughter, and is accepting of this. She has NO REASON to lie.
NO one kills themselves just cause they’re gay. People kill themselves for two reasons: One, they are trying to get out of taking responsibility for some crime they committed, or two, they are severely depressed, and the voices were too hard to resist. I know, I’ve been there.
If he WERE gay, the only one who lied was him and he’s not here to defend himself, so, you know, I’m going to take Ms. Osmond at her word.
so the fad for 2011 is that if your gay and under 21 your a suicide risk. What a stupid analogy and another latched on to by the media looking to fill space and get the money shot of a crying mom. Folks … straight people commit suicide .. african-americans commit suicide .. just like asian, latinos, old people, men, women, married, single and divorced. Suicide is about depression whatever your circumstances .. being gay in itself is not a recipe for suicide .. too many teens suffer from depression and confusion … being gay is only one part of it
“so the fad for 2011 is that if your gay and under 21 your a suicide risk” It’s not a fad, it’s a risk. Of course not all teen gays are suicide risks, some get through it just fine. But some don’t and even one is too many. To knock “It Get’s Better” as a fad is offensive twaddle. Yes other people commit suicide for other reasons. and chances are Marie’s son was one of them. Loneliness is one of them – if people think you a geek or oddball, you can be very lonely, gay or straight. Appearance is another, gay or straight (and from experience at age 6,4, alas, it doesn’t get better)..