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Gay student kicked out by parents over prom date

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  1. What a brave young man.

    Especially considering what hateful scumbags his parents seem.

  2. Jean-Paul Bentham 25 Mar 2010, 12:17pm

    Strange parents indeed. They should be proud of him; the guy just made history!

  3. Mihangel apYrs 25 Mar 2010, 12:18pm

    well, his parents will certainly look well in the eyes of other bigots. For others their actions will be unacceptable, I certainly wouldn’t want to be around them or deal with them!

  4. Christine Rourke 25 Mar 2010, 12:43pm

    Yep… it’s hard, but he’s best away from them.

    chrissie
    xxxx

  5. Pumpkin Pie 25 Mar 2010, 1:01pm

    And in complete contrast, you’ve got Constance’s who actually are worthy of being called parents. Very good ones at that.

  6. Yup, I agree with Christine (4): parents like that are best as ex-parents.

  7. Derrick Martin your my hero of the day.

  8. jamestoronto 25 Mar 2010, 1:35pm

    Derrick, get away from those two people who call you your parents!! Parents should be giving you unconditional love and support – yours have done the exact opposite. Everyone deserves all the love they can get in this world. If your family is bigot-bent on not giving it, then they are not real family.

    Don’t look back because they are the losers. You will find a new family – not necessarily of blood – but of love – and that is what family is all about.

    You are one brave man.

  9. I have often said there should be the option for people to divorce their parents. Derrick should be allowed to divorce his parents.

  10. BCHS Student 25 Mar 2010, 2:45pm

    gay people want equal rights, right? well, how is all this stupid, feeling-sorry-for attention on this matter, that is not even a big deal, any equal to a straight person bringing their date to prom…the school is allowing him to go with his boyfriend..so why all the extra unneeded attention? noone cares. im tired of hearing about it. maybe i should go give an interview so i can be on the headline news too?! im sure there are many other important things the news should be focusing on.

  11. Jean-Paul Bentham 25 Mar 2010, 2:58pm

    m-m. Strange parents indeed. They should be proud of him; the guy just made history!

    Boorish or what.

  12. How sad that parents, still, hate their children, their own flesh and blood. How scaberous of them, and reflects on their selfish natures to reject the child who had the courage of his convictions to challenge a false ruling. Good luck to him! And shame on your detractors!

  13. @BCHS Student – Maybe because straight people are able to bring their date without the slightest hint of a worry about whether they’ll be allowed to? Maybe because some schools are so bigoted that they’d rather cancel a prom than have a girl bring her girlfriend? Maybe because some Americans are so ignorant in their ‘religion’ that they’d throw out their own son?

    If you don’t like all the publicity Derrick’s getting, then think on this: no LGBT people wants special attention either. They just want to live their lives like any straight person, without bigotry and prejudice. This publicity has only happend because, in some parts of the US, gay rights are a Big Deal. When we’re treated equally by everyone, there’ll be no need for any focus on us, and we can get on with our lives like everybody else.

  14. I agree that his parents’ asking him to leave home looks bad but this article says very little about it. ‘Media attention’ could be the key phrase here. I imagine it could be pretty horrendous in the Deep South and it may have been necessary for the guy to move out (perhaps temporarily? – Nothing is said about this)in order to take some of the heat off. I would like to think Martin’s parents would stand by him (in part by keeping him close), but I feel it is wrong to rush to judgement about this.

  15. Mihangel apYrs 25 Mar 2010, 3:55pm

    Riondo: if he was kicked out, his parents behaved like s*its, no arguments, no ifs, no buts. If it’s down to “media attention”, guess what, someone else, his friend (and family) are taking the heat for FRIENDSHIP. His parents don’t know the meaning of “unconditional love”, and don’t deserve any.

  16. Jean-Paul Bentham 25 Mar 2010, 4:12pm

    “A gay student who persuaded his school to allow him to take his boyfriend to prom has been kicked out by his parents.”

    I don’t feel inclined to second-guess this statement; crystal clear to me.

  17. Har Davids 25 Mar 2010, 5:49pm

    As a parent it’s your duty to support your kids, even though you may not always do so whole-heartedly, but kicking them out? I don’t even know what mine would have to do to make me do such a thing as long as it wasn’t seriously criminal. To be honest: I would hate it if he found religion.

  18. Now this story tells that his parents have kicked him out of his house, but they dont reveal the whole truth behind the matter. Raymond Martin (Derick Martin’s father) had to attend both of his sisters funerals last year. If that wasnt bad enough he also had to plan the funeral of both his parents. Just to top things off his wife has cancer, so Mr. Martin had good reason in kicking his son out, their life is stressful enough right now with out the media butting in.

    feel free to email me for more info

  19. Someday his parents will feel so wrong and regretful. And they will deserve every bit of it.

  20. Non Man – Thank you, this information rather vindicates my point. It is very hard for anyone else to picture just what such a family is going through and it is not difficult to imagine even a supportive parent asking Derrick Martin to go if a storm of possibly very vicious publicity erupted around them with him as the focus. Naturally I applaud his friends supporting him in all this but maybe they feel strong enough to do so – we just don’t know that his family do.
    Again I repeat that the article is uninformative and even confusing. ‘kicked out’ suggests aggressive rejection, but being ‘led to ask’ someone to leave because of media attention could point to great reluctance. The parents’ motives are not clear from this article and Non Man supplies information suggesting that they are not as deserving of our righteous anger as we might think.
    Let’s admire Martin’s stand, commend his friends, and maybe exercise a little forbearance and compassion regarding his parents.

  21. Vincent G, Paris, France (straight) 25 Mar 2010, 6:47pm

    Derrick: BRAVO!
    Your story goes around the world (http://www.rue89.com/2010/03/25/les-bals-de-promo-americains-souvrent-aux-couples-homos-144441)!
    I am very proud of you. It is not always easy to fight for your identity at your age, especially in a biggot state like Georgia (where I have lived for a year) but, hey, CHANGE HAS COME TO AMERICA!
    Life is not going to be all easy but some fights can be won and you are doing this for tons of other kids too. I am proud for you: you make the world move forward.

  22. Mihangel apYrs 25 Mar 2010, 6:57pm

    I’m sorry, Riondo, but everything the father has gone through the son has experienced as well as living in Hicksville as a gay young man, AND with his mother’s cancer which will affect him at least as much as it will his father.

    Unconditional love and support mean just that: if his father can’t hack it and back and protect his son then the boy’s well out of it, and should walk away without a bakward glance, making clear to his mother why he will not be around. They don’t deserve his love, and when his father wants him back a quick FO is the correct response.

    We don’t ask to be born, our parents choose to have us: a child is for life not convenience

  23. Father Andrew Gentry 25 Mar 2010, 7:08pm

    Riondo, just for your information being a redneck is not a matter of region in the US it is a matter of right wing anti-everything progressive. The Deep South is no more nor less bigoted than New York, California, Texas, Ohio, or Washington, DC where bigots now have their own political movement called the Tea Party. The only difference between the South and then rest of the US is in the South you know who hates you and up North and outwest you are not always sure!

  24. BrazilBoysBlog 25 Mar 2010, 7:32pm

    @Riondo. I agree with you on this. I was very unsatisfied reading this piece. The headline was that this boy had been ´kicked-out´. I clicked on it, angry already at the very thought of such a thing.

    Upon reading the article, there was very little information regarding the actual headline and a lot about him winning his right to take his boyfriend to the prom.

    I agree that parents who would kick out their son for being gay are scumbags, but this was not said in the article. The further info from ´No Man´ is more revealing still. Interesting also that there are comments from the lad about the prom victory, but NOTHING about being ´thrown out´.

    Is it not possible that due to the media frenzy, and given the circumstances of the family, this lad has gone to his friends to give the family a break from something they cannot deal with at the moment? This is possibly a sensationalist headline that bears little or no relation to the actual story. (Something we HAVE seen before).

    Either way, I prefer to be sure of my facts before I jump on the bandwagon of verbally hanging the parents….Something I am NOT from reading this piece!

  25. Article says, “has been kicked out by his parents”
    Was a reporter there and saw him “kicked out?”
    Who first used the expression “kicked out?”

    From an article of 100+ words I read all kinds of responses —
    much or most of it unfounded.

    You have no idea who the parents are and what the situation
    was that makes up the articles’s contents.

    There’s 18 years of this boy’s life involved and we don’t know
    anything about him or his parents, so whatever your response is
    simply conjecture based on emotion.

    Don’t be so hasty to be jury, judge and executioner until you know the full story.

  26. This is an interesting one. If his mother has cancer or the family has been inundated with publicity then it would be prudent for him to stay with friends to give her and them a rest from it. I think maybe this story is not complete and only some of the info has been used, be it all eroneously, to sell newspapers.

  27. “From an article of 100+ words I read all kinds of responses –
    much or most of it unfounded.”

    Oh, now come along Hank…. we’ve seen you make all sort of wild accusations about gay people from unfounded NARTH “research”, and make silly theories about “new world order” conspiracies based on a few bible lines. Lets not be coy, we’re all old friends here.

    Glass houses and all that, Hankie…..

    …..but how’s the acceptance of that study that proved most homophobes are gay? Did you reconcile that yet with your own “inner demons”?

  28. Jean-Paul Bentham 25 Mar 2010, 9:11pm

    @17 & 22-

    You guys obviously have a child, maybe more. Frankly, I admire your principles, and I feel certain you are speaking from experience.

    As for me, at the moment I do know a young man, a student, who is living at home and who is scared to death of coming out to his parents. He is so terrified it affects his grades and his entire future. His dad is a disciplinarian; his mom, a simple christian woman who has told him time and time again that she hopes he’s “not one of those” because he has never had a girlfriend.

    It is a fact that young gays have been intimidated by their parents for years, finally asked to leave the house, and also that some wonderful, sensitive guys have plunged into suicide because of it.

    Bottom line is…if we’re going to speculate, let’s admit we are speculating and watch the issue go in every which way.

    Personally I tend to listen to those of us who know something about fathering a son.

  29. Maybe this will take the edge off the debate about whether his parents kicked him out or not? In his own words, as published on http://www.theedgeboston.com and as he told WMAZ-13 a local news channel in Georgia:

    “Derrick, who has been open about his sexuality since his sophomore year, told the media that his parents have tossed him out. Speaking without evident rancor, Derrick told Macon news channel: “It’s their house. It’s always been their house–so they can take me or not. It’s the same thing as African Americans wanting their rights, or any minority wanting their rights. Every person is a human being and they deserve their rights.”

    http://www.13wmaz.com/news/local/story.aspx?storyid=76707&catid=153

    His parents, whatever their troubles chose to have a child. To kick him out for this shows how little they love him. End of.

  30. BrazilBoysBlog 26 Mar 2010, 12:51am

    @29 Nick. Indeed, if this is in fact the true story, (and it contains more info than we got here on Pink News), then I totally agree with you!

  31. This is from one of the comments on the second of Nicks links

    “He has volunteered to be a victim of a hate crime, he is a target now. God forbid anything happens to him, but he opened that door himself.” – MessiahsChild

    Only a fundie Christian would think a victim of a hate crime is responsible for it!

  32. Dave North 26 Mar 2010, 3:51am

    “CHANGE HAS COME TO AMERICA!” Vincent G, Paris, France (straight)

    If only you were right.

    Apparently 38% of Republicans thing Obama is the Anti-Christ and the wingnuts even state bible passages that they think prove it.

    The USA is dying a slow death on the world stage.

  33. Jean-Paul Bentham 26 Mar 2010, 4:01am

    I suppose some nutter has seen the four horseman of the Apocalypse….again.

  34. message to you – know how supported you are, talk with your mates, share stuff, find your world, be loved and you’ll get through this…

  35. Christina Pillow 26 Mar 2010, 5:53am

    Derrick Martin WAS NOT KICKED OUT OF HIS HOME!!!!!Derrick’s Mother is a very sick woman and does not need the stress that is put upon her at this time.
    The truth is that Derricks parents almost begged him not to go to the public in fear of their safety and his, Derrick was informed by his Mother that if he went through with the interviews and such that he would be asked to leave and making the choices that he has ,his Mother had to stand her ground.
    Derrick Martin has had a good life ,his parents are both very good Christian people and both have a strong military history,Derricks parents have always given Derrick the best that they possibly could,all they ask is a peaceful life, they do not hate their son, they love their son , and up to this point they done all they can for him. and again I say Derrick is not hated by his Family but loved very much, We are confused at why he needs all of this attention and why he is not telling the truth.
    DERRICK WAS NOT KICKED OUT!!!neither was he told to leave because of his date to the prom, He was asked to leave because his Mother is very sick and cannot take the stress,The Martin parents do not hate their son but will not support his lifestyle.
    Derrick Martin emancipated him self at 17 years old,and if one chooses to act like an adult,then I say be an adult get a job , get a life , I do not care if you are gay, or even an alien just stop dragging your Parents in the mud, they have always been there for you so now it is your turn to stand up for them,their love for you will never stop, but their tolerance is running low.

    Derrick I have but one question to ask you to think about, How would you feel if after bringing all this stress to your Mother, if she was to pass on to heavens pearly gates because of what you are doing? Not because of who you are but because of your choices?

    Sincerely;
    Your loving Aunt
    Christina Pillow
    March 26,2010

  36. Yeah, lady, real great Christians. Take your Southern gentility and your Christianity and shove them up your ass! So Derrick is supposed to live his life and stay in the closet just to make Mommy and Daddy happy? I don’t think so. What happened? Did his mother get an attack of the “vapors” because people now know he is gay? Not everyone wants to live a lie and Derrick is one of those people. How ironic–Xtians asking someone to live a lie–NOT!

    Thank GOD that Constance Mc Millen has decent parents and not lying cowards!

  37. Whoever you are @35 the one thing that is certain is your not Derricks aunt. Its obvious reading this that your posting in a detached way and not as someone with first person knowledge or a emotional attachment to Derrick or the Martin family.

    My guess is your some kid from a school somewhere in the US, you are probably in the closet and feel that by outing himself Derrick is outing you too. Your faith has taught you to hate yourself and anybody who is open about their sexuality. Your jealous that Derrick is gay and your religious beliefs say you can not be.

    Your path to happiness in not through jesus or any other make-believe person. Happiness can only come from within and that starts with excepting who you are not what a book tells you you are.

  38. If what Abi writes is correct, 35, you need to come out of the closet. This is the 21st Century. There is a whole world out there these days–even GLBT friendly churches and synagogues. Living in the closet is a lonely way to live. Come out, accept yourself, and leave all that self-hatred behind.

  39. The state should take away all parental rights of this sick couple.

    And place their kids in gay foster homes.

  40. If I had a son and I was ill, I’d want my son WITH me, not pushed away. I fail to see what illness/stress has to do with this. Obviously, if it’s true, I’m sorry for the family’s difficulties, but that STILL doesn’t make it right to ‘kick out’ a child, as is being reported. In fact, doing so has INCREASED the media attention, not lessened it.

  41. Iris, I think “Ms. Pillow” comment is a sham.

    “Derrick I have but one question to ask you to think about, How would you feel if after bringing all this stress to your Mother, if she was to pass on to heavens pearly gates because of what you are doing? Not because of who you are but because of your choices?”

    – this line is the give-away. Its some religious nut masquerading. The word “choice” alluded to something no aunt would say. And here, on a British gay site?

  42. I think we have the makings of a “soap opera” — everybody’s
    a writer of this script — keeps adding a new twist or giving
    their opinion of how this “tragedy” should drag out — well
    until you know the facts, keep on keeping on. We all like to
    think we’re experts on mankind and society.

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