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Man called Gay changes surname to join the Navy

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  1. Eh? He changed the surname? It’s “Tristram” I’d have wiped from my passport and birth cert.

  2. Is this kid starting a new ex-Gay movement?!

  3. He should know that some fundie webservers have a programme to automatically change that surname for him, though I doubt he would’ve appreciated the altenative!

  4. Jack the cabin lad 19 Feb 2010, 1:37pm

    I would have thought Mr Gay would be very popular in the Navy. Hope he soon finds the golden rivet.

  5. It sadly speaks volumes about “Gay” being considered and used as a derogatory term.

  6. Tistram isn’t exactly butch love :)

  7. what an idiot

  8. I would have thought it an appropriate name for a member of the ROYAL Navy……..???

  9. Mr. Howard Berar 19 Feb 2010, 3:25pm

    He did it right.

  10. I can’t say I really blame him, the teasing must be a serious bore. Shame he couldn’t think of another surname he’s associated with – his mother’s for example – rather than picking one from a movie, though.

  11. Reminds me of the old Monty Python Skit:

    PUBLIC NOTICE: We would like it to be know that on this day, Mr Arthur PENIS of 21 Acacia Avenue, Chelmsford, has changed his name by dee poll.
    He now wishes to be known as Mr. Michael PENIS.

  12. gays not been happy for years
    he\’s a silly bugger

  13. What a snivelling scared idiot.

    His father and ancestors will be turning in their graves.

    Grow up.

  14. Think I’d have been busy having a word with my Mum and Dad for saddling me with Tristram for a starter. Silly sod should have kept quiet, because someone will suss out who he is and it will be worse than ever. He should have gone for the double and kept his mouth shut.

  15. Oh, he is changing it, to Tristan. That’ll go down a storm.

  16. x-Village People 20 Feb 2010, 3:24pm

    My x-partner was in the Navy up until 2006…and prejudice still applied in that “It may be legal, but it’s still not allowed”.

    I still know a Navy officer responsible for ‘Equality & Diversity’ issues, who is openly opposed to the Human Rights Act

    …so there is little hope for any gay pesonel under his command.

    …and I heard the Navy declined to take part in Plymouth Pride last year???

  17. Carvero: “What a snivelling scared idiot.”

    You are a tactless wanker that obviously has no concept of what it is like to be in the armed forces, barracked with loads of other young guys. If you did you might understand what it might be like to have an officer shout “GAY!” across a yard at you.

    People might be slowly accommodating homosexuality, but it is not going to stop the constant sniggering and comments behind your back, even if you are straight and have a rather unfortunate name.

    I fell sorry for the lad, and I fully support him in his decision.
    He has grown up and learned to face the real world, unlike you and your nasty puerile attitude.

  18. I thought this was a silly non-story, and a waste of space. but actually, looking at it that wsy, RobN has a point. There’s a lot of unnecessary cruelty in the world.

  19. RobN –
    I detect a major inconsistency in your attitudes here. On other threads you repeatedly exhort people to ‘get a thick skin’ or ‘learn to take a joke’ if they react angrily to explicit public homophobia, but here express every sympathy for someone who actually changes his name (a very big reaction indeed) in response to precisely the same attitudes. Is it that you consider homophobia more serious if straight people suffer it? A very self-oppressive attitude, if so.

  20. Riondo: I have never denied that homophobia is alive and well. I just think it is to what should actually be defined as truly malicious activity, as opposed to a bit of light-hearted banter at our expense. There is one thing to poke fun on odd occasions, and another to have to suffer effectively 24/7 constant ribbing from a herd of less-than-politically-correct lads in a barrack room environment. Although the name calling is not such a big deal, per se, I am sure there would be a continual barrage of comments that would wear anyone down after a while.
    It is really all a matter of degree.

  21. Mihangel apYrs 21 Feb 2010, 6:38pm

    but surely, RobN, once “Tristan” has shagged all the girls he can, his sexuality wouldn’t be an issue, and “gay” would be just playful banter…

  22. RobN –
    I think this is where you’re wrong. It’s not just about degree. It’s about kind. On other threads you have tended to dismiss concerns about stereotyping contempt expressed for lgbt people in broadcast and print media by influential public/cultural figures. These have a legitimising and reinforcing effect on public attitudes which nasty bully-boys in the changing-room don’t have, however unpleasant their effect on individuals(in fact the bully-boys usually have their perceptions shaped by the popular media culture) . You over-individualise your response – ‘occasional fun-poking’ is how sneering by media figures can seem to an individual in comparison to harassment in the barack-room, but its effects on the general climate I would say are worse and more insidious.

  23. RobN, you smack of disappointment… for all that you have said in the past, your comment today completely shows you have an incoherent principle.
    And to this idiot child, it appears he lacks self-confidence. People are called different names and they only change it for WORTHY reasons not for such a fairy tale. I know & have friends with the same surname. They have come to appreciate their last name more because it makes them famous everywhere. Addressing someone by their surname does not in anywhere make you that? Are all Mr. or Ms. Field , fields? Are all Backhouses that? Grow some sense people. This is the lamest excuse to change a name and the Navy (except for discrimination/Human Rights accusers) may reconsider recruiting this man. From all the jokes, insults, homophobia and what-have-you out there, calling people Mr. Gay is, if not inexistent, rarely used… This child is yet to develop and I fear him being in the Navy where ability to be confident personality is a need.

  24. Riondo / Godwyns: I can only speak from personal experience having been constantly ribbed throughout my (public) school life for having big ears. You may think this is trivial, but it went on. And on. And on… For years. Old kids left, new ones arrived, and I was still the butt of kid’s jokes.
    It’s a bit like the Steve Martin character ‘Cyrano’ where he turns on everyone and reels out all the lines, “Oh, I hadn’t heard that one before”. etc etc. One does learn to live with it after a while, and fortunately, as I grew up, my ears kind of became proportional!

    I just think this guy will suffer a similar fate, and it is one that is totally avoidable. Living in close quarters with people is not easy at the best of times, and when you are living, working, eating and sleeping with those same people 24/7, there is NO respite, and nowhere to get away from it.

    If someone calls me a poof, or has a jibe, I just laugh with them. I see nothing wrong in that. What I do find wrong is when those jibes either go on continually, or they become barbed and nasty. That is when a joke turns to homophobia.

  25. Mihangel apYrs 23 Feb 2010, 2:38pm

    I agree its the relentless unceasing nature that can cause damage, but can’t you see that that’t what some of us have been concerned about where society, or parts of it, validates such bullying, and kids pick up on it.

    Adults can (usually) shake it off; kids bullied by continual verbal queer-bashing are less able to protect themselves and usually have no-one to protect them.

    What you may consider whiney, poof-pathos at first sight is this recognition.

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