In an idea world everyone should come out, Im out and quite happy, anyone who didnt like it could f**k off but there are still some out there for whom either its difficult or they just dont want to as they feel its no one elses business and I fully agree with them. Im quite happy to answer questions on my sexuality but I have some good friends whom are comfortable with themselves but dont feel the need to tell others and no before anyone says it, its more out of privacy that they do this, not because they are uncomfortable in themselves. Fair dues to Robert Taylor, its people like him who lead the charge.
I have thought about this long and hard for many years and I am coming to the conclusion that all those who don’t come out at work but who claim that they are happy with their sexuality “but don’t feel the need to let others know” are simply being cowardly and they are lying to themselves!
It’s nonsense this “I don’t feel the need to let others know”!
In reality it means, “I just don’t have the confidence to be counted as a proud self-respecting gay man!”
And as long as this remains the case we’ll continue to have gutless wonders hiding in closets.
Can I open an account and have you as my personal bank manager please (remember that advert when the bank manager lived in the closet?) :-0
I think with the certainty of a Tory government in waiting, It actually might be good for this advise to be acted on. The more that are open about it at the top of business the more cloat we have.
“In reality it means, “I just don’t have the confidence to be counted as a proud self-respecting gay man!”
Paul do you wear the rainbow flag tied around your waist in work too? I think we should let others come out screaming “We’re straight and proud”, cop on FFS. Again I can see you probably are a lover of Peter Tatchell.
ChutneyBear, I don’t think that’s fair on Paul. Being open about your true self with everyone does not necessitate wearing a rainbow-coloured flag round your waist. Paul has not suggested you do that. Is Robert Taylor wearing one round his waist? No.
What’s needed is for every gay man or woman to take up their jobs and talk about their loved ones and their lives in the same free and open manner that heterosexuals do. We are not thieves, we have nothing disgusting to hide. This is all that it is about. And until all gay men and women can REALLY respect themselves so much that they WILL be free and open about themselves we can’t expect heterosexuals to totally comfortable with us. It’s not possible to comfortable with people who have decided to hide such a fundamental part of their being.
Gay and a huge bankers’ bonus – a delicious combination! Robert hasn’t mentioned if he is still with the aforementioned partner, or available. And I thought it was only old queens who banked with Coutts!
Eddy my apologies I will admit it when I am wrong I took Pauls comments out of context and Paul my apologies. You are right we should be able to discuss our partners in the same context as others without fear of being shunned. :o)
Good for you, Chutney Bear! Well said.
Why the pressure to come out? My straight friends didn’t come to me one by one and have me sit with them and hold their hands whilst they divulged they were actually breeders, so why the compulsion to announce to all and sundry you’re a guy who likes cock? Its just another example of self-absorption, “ME and MY sexuality are sooo very important”. A more pressing question; Has he blown his bonus on trade?!
or what has he blown lol
No, C, that’s a bunch of illogical nonsense that you’ve come up with there as an excuse not to be brave and plucky and let people know that you are who you are, gay, a queer. Full stop.
Your straight friends don’t need to come to you and confide that they are straight. 90% of people ARE absolutely straight. It is a given in this world, if you really haven’t noticed, that EVERYONE is straight.
So it’s only YOU and me, and all of us who are gay or bi, who have to be gutsy and just airily say you saw a corker guy walking down the road just now and you completely forgot what you were supposed to be doing! That’s all it takes. Easy as pie. And then, after that, stick with it. And you don’t have to ram it down their throats non-stop like some neurotic camp queen. Just the occasional disclosure and reminder of who you really are. That’s all that’s required.
And it will take one HELL of a load of stress off YOUR shoulders! Believe everyone who says it does!
Why on earth would a gay man with more than just a modicum of self-respect call himself a chutney bear? It’s as repugnant as that woman in America saying what she did about penises wriggling around in excrement!
out has been way better for me than the closet, but come on
a guy can only do what a guy can do.
what works for you doesn’t work for everyone.
your loving support is more helpful than impatience and name calling.
This “Eric Whitney”, I understand, is a self-confessed LA-based whore. It would seem that he may consider that the services by which he makes his money constitute the supply of “loving support”. So admonitions of his are of little value.