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Same-sex couples urged to hold hands in public

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  1. Good luck to this campaign. I can’t even get my wife to hold my hand in a gay environment let alone publically. Ah well … (sigh).

  2. Stuart Neyton 23 Apr 2009, 6:08pm

    It would be nice if this was possible without people either staring or commenting. I haven’t held hands in public since someone shouted “gay fuckers” at us a while back.

  3. Pumpkin Pie 23 Apr 2009, 7:14pm

    “We want straight people to hold hands with someone of their same gender in public, and describe how it made them feel.”

    D’aww… That’s cute. I have the highest respect for straight people who don’t take offense if people think they’re gay.

  4. Stuart Neyton – difficult as I know it is, try to ignore them. I always hold hands with my girlfriend when we go out even though we’ve been shouted at, spat at, had vomiting noises made in our faces, had rubbish thrown at us, and been verbally abused more times than I can count. It’s not easy, but I refuse to let small-minded spiteful idiots dictate what I can and can’t do in public.

    This is a sweet idea.

  5. Iris:
    You and your partner have nerves of steel and I want to congratulate you.
    My partner and I, who live in a small town in northern New Brunswick in Atlantic Canada, have been dreaming of holding hands in public since the day we met 20 years ago.
    We actually did it when we vacationed in Quebec City, and again in the Gay Village in Montreal where gays not only hold hands in public, they cuddle and kiss and nobody gives a sh*t. When we visited a lonely beach on Prince Edward Island, we actually got naked and kissed for half an hour taking pictures of ourselves as we cuddled. We have friends in San Francisco who say holding hands in public there has been taken for granted for years.
    But here where we live, a small town where we have family, nieces, nephews, in-laws, neighbors… you know the rest, we would be thrown out of a third story window by local rednecks who have a dozen cans of beer for breakfast before raping their wives and leaving the house for the day. They would scratch the paint off our car and probably set fire to our little house.
    Why don’t we move? Why oh why? We have lots of reasons to love the place, go figure.
    Sorry, sweet idea, but Pumpkin Pie gets my vote today.

  6. I commend all of you who hold hands, cuddle, kiss whatever you like in public! I do hope that when my English girlfriend and I see each other for the first time, whether here or over there, we won’t let anyone spoil our first kiss when we meet at the at the airport. Power to this campaign! It’s a beautiful idea and long overdue.

  7. Abi Chrisopher 24 Apr 2009, 4:10am

    The posts on this page just show how far we still have to come to establish equality. We must move attention past the marriage debate and onto these areas of establishing true equality in society.

  8. David Griff 24 Apr 2009, 7:54am

    It’s wierd but I actually feel more comfortable kissing guys in public than I do holding hands with them. I can’t even hold hands in gay environments, but I think thats to do with me being physically attacked once upon a time for holding hands wth a guy, should get over it but suppose it takes time

  9. I wouldn’t hold hands with someone in public but that’s more to do with me not being 12 years old.

  10. In South Korea, girls have been holding hands in public regardless of sexual orientation. It is thought to be a sort of expression of friendship between girls in kind of East Asian culture. Nobody think it wierd. In part it might be because existence of gay people is not visible enough yet. Anyway, this circumstances make Korean gay girls feel comfortable holding hands in publc…I think it’s not bad. anyway, Good luck!!

  11. Jean-Paul – how horrible :( I’d assumed all of Canada was quite liberal, but, like every country, I suppose it’s all down to the specific local area where you live. I’d also guess (maybe wrongly) that it’s harder to hold hands in public if you’re both male. I don’t know if that’s true or not?
    People should mind their own business. When I’m out in public, I don’t even notice who’s holding hands (straight or gay). Those who are constantly focussed on other people must have extremely boring lives.
    Jane – each to their own, but I hold hands with my girlfriend because it makes both of us feel good. Not in a bravado way, just in a nice, relaxed, gentle way – the physical contact and the occasional squeeze to show how much I care about her.

  12. I remember some bastard telling me off for holding hands in front of his children. I wish I’d seen gay men doing it when I was a kid. This is worth doing although you’ve got to feel strong to deal with all the curiosity and stares and you should do it somewhere where there are lots of people to minimise getting physically assaulted. I love it when I see gay people holding hands it makes me feel good.

  13. Pumpkin Pie 24 Apr 2009, 12:09pm

    Thanks, Jean-Paul! :3

    And regarding this fascinating stuff about East Asian girls… Being a bit of a weeaboo (anime geek, japanophile, whatever), I have spent a long time “examining” Japanese culture from a distance. Apparently, it’s considered healthy for young teen girls to get crushes on other girls and experiment with them in what could be regarded as “proto-relationships”, in preparation for “real” relationships with boys when they’re older. It is pretty adorable, but it does carry the unfortunate connotation that same-sex attraction is a childish habit to be grown out of.

    Still, Japan has always been pretty open-minded towards homosexuality. Unfortunately, it seems that this open-mindedness took a bit of a blow in the 20th century, when Japan was eager to show the rest of the world how “civilised” it was (horrific war crimes notwithstanding). Still, it is leaps and bounds ahead of many other Western countries.

  14. Brian Burton 24 Apr 2009, 2:11pm

    When I was in North Africa in the early 1960s, local men always held hands as they walked down the street. There must be some thing about the heat of North Africa (Libia.) Because local guys were always trying to pull my pants down when I was there.

  15. Vincent Poffley 24 Apr 2009, 2:37pm

    Great! Wonderful! I’ll have some of that! Now if only I could actually find someone to hold hands with…

  16. It is an evil taboo-not being free to hold hands in public.
    To think that some of these people who restrict others are actually heterosexual and parents.

  17. Iris:
    Thanks for the feedback. You are right about localities. We don’t call our little town ‘the brink of civilization’ for nothing, but we do have plumbing and a good public sewage system!
    Most ordinary people here know we are gay, we pay our taxes, they are friendly when they meet us at the grocery store, etc., as long as we don’t talk about being gay. Talking about the weather is a safe alternative.
    We love this place mostly because of its unspoiled natural beauty, its open spaces, fresh air, beautiful bay, etc.

    Pumpkin Pie:
    You must surely know that Japan is a country whose civilization evolved without the influence of the Abrahamic religions,and its history of homosexuality, as well as China’s and India’s, read like a fairy tale (no pun intended).
    It is only when christian missionaries (jesuits, mostly) arrived there and encouraged the habits of ‘civilized’ Europe to torture, and put the torch ‘sodomites’, men and boys, without anything remotely resembling a fair trial, that the Eastern mentalities were vitiated by christianity (small ‘c’ intentional).

    Incidentally, I love the picture of the two American soldiers holding hands. Reminds me of a sight which would have been common in the Sacred Band of Thebes, which also existed in a civilization untouched by christian homophobia.

  18. We have between together nearly 3 years and have probably only held hands in public where we live a couple of times. It’s real sad when we see hetero couples walking along hand in hand and hugging each other and no-one notices, yet we do it once and get verbally attacked. We often go away just to be “out as a couple” in public.

    I hope A Day In Hand will educate some, but I don’t think it will do enough to change those hardened “hetero” mind sets.

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